Love Never Existed - Hyunsung

[22]

As our eyes met, my action of nibbling with my lips halted.

A heat cropped from the base of my neck and climbed up to my cheeks. I felt beyond embarrassed.

It was the very first time in my life I genuinely blushed so hard.

I never imagined that Jinsu would be the one making me blush to that extent.

No man has ever done that to me. Jinsu was indeed special.

"Ji...?" after who knows how many minutes of us staring at each other, Jinsu uttered my name, "why are you still awake? Can't sleep?"

"I- yeah..."

"Huh? Why? Nightmares? Do you need more covers? Or what's the reason?" Jinsu asked naively.

I shook my head to the first questions, but I didn't know how to answer the last inquiry. I couldn't say that I was not able to sleep because of her.

The only thing I could do at that moment was to turn my face to the side in the hope this could give me the chance to think about something quickly.

But nothing came to my mind. I only could think of one thing, and that is that I wanted to dig a big hole in the ground and bury myself in it.

"Are you okay, Ji? Did something happen?"

I nodded. "Everything is fine, Jinsu. Nothing happened. Go back to sleep, yeah?"

After noticing my strange behavior, Jinsu slowly sat up, "hey..." and tugged from the hem of my shirt to direct my attention towards her.

I heeded this action, thinking I could at least act natural, so when I faced her, I smiled.

However, I averted my gaze in the same instant our eyes met. I couldn't even look at those lovely eyes for more than three seconds.

I felt dirty for having such improper thoughts about her.

Even if she tried to act sexy in the past, I knew inside of her still resided that cute and sweet girl I once met.

I don't know how or since when my heart started to pound at a light speed every time I locked eyes with her. But I only noticed it until now.

"I can't sleep if you are like this, Ji..." She said softly, "please, look at me..."

"I can't..." I mumbled, "please, go back to sleep. I'll follow you right after..."

Jinsu paid no attention to my request. She scooted closer, lifted my face with her warm hands, and cupped my cheeks, "what do you mean 'you can't'? Why can you not look at me, huh? Is it because of what I did earlier? Are you still mad at me?" Her face went from worried to concern and from concern to sad within a second, and this only made me feel more guilty. "I'm sorry... I'm really sorry... I-"

"No, Jinsu. I'm not mad at you because of that..."

She observed my features, trying to read me.

I tried to play it off, so, I managed to show her a subtle and sheepish smile.

However, my eyes betrayed me. They went a little bit down and rested on those fire lips, reminding me of that sweet flavor she always provides me every time we kiss.

I frowned and slightly shook my head to get rid of that thought.

"Fuck!" I whispered a cursing word under my breath, but loud enough for her to catch it.

"Ji? What's wrong?"

"I just... I don't...I don't know..." I said while rubbing my head harshly. I couldn't comprehend what was happening inside of me. "I don't know, Jinsu. I think...I think something is wrong with me tonight..." I said while removing her hands from my cheeks and holding them instead.