Whitey Winn One Shots

Wifey Material

I sat at my desk deep in my magazines, bill sat at his own desk doing some paperwork, la belle can be such a boring little town sometimes. I heard the door so I glanced over and saw miss Callie dun the schoolmistress and ex whore she smiled giving me a little wave.

"Morning Miss dun something I can help you with?" Bill asked her

"Nothing much Sherrif just thought I'd pop in and all, my niece just arrived to stay a while from my brothers out east I figured I'd show her around the town" she smiled I expected a little girl or something to come wondering in behind her but I was taken aback a little, it was a woman... I'd guess a year or so longer than me in a beautiful black and white striped dress, black riding boots with white ribbon laces, the same white ribbons tied her hair she.... She was beautiful. "You gonna say hello?" Callie asked her

"Hello" she smiled clearly nervous

"Nice to meet you little lady, sheriff mcneue" he smiled trying to be pleasant with her "excuse my deputy, should have made him clean up I knew he'd be meeting a nice lady" he laughs

"Hello" she smiled at me

"Uhh hello, whitey, whitey winn. What uhh what's your name?"

"Y/n"

"Y/n. Well that's a very beautiful name for a very beautiful lady" I smiled giving her hand a kiss making her blush a little

"It was lovely meeting you both" she smiled before her and Callie went off elsewhere in town

"What?" He asked noticing me

"What?"

"What's that look for whitey?"

"... nothin'"

"Whitey, speak up or shut up"

"She's a very nice lady"

"Ummmm," he says returning to his paperwork

"Pretty"

"Ummmm"

"Cute, that little blush was so adorable"

"Ummmm"

"She's a sweet little thing"

"No whitey"

"What?"

"No." He told me "quit eyeing the new girl and load those guns," he told me

"I wasn't eyein' her!"

"Weren't you?"

"No, I wasn't"

"What were you doing then?"

"Lookin'"

"Why were you looking"

"I just... didn't think that still existed. Weather in this day and age it had rather stopped being produced" I said slightly moving my chair on its wheels

"What had?" He asks looking up from his work

"Wifey material" I smirked looking at that little dress wander down through the windows

"Whitey Winn. Look at that beautiful eligible adorable young lady" he says

"Yeah?"

"You'd have better chances picking up young eligible ladies in a graveyard"

"Why?"

"Why? You really wanna know why?"

"Yeah"

"You bathe maybe once a month, you have a twang that even a texas farmhand would argue was overbearing, you've never once combed your hair, you've been wearing the same clothes for the last four years without washing them, your house is a dump, you can barely feed yourself and the only remarkable skill you have is being a decent shot with a pair of 45s. You're not exactly.... Husband material. Especially for a girl like that"

"I could bathe. If she wanted me too."

"Ohh she'll want you too"

"But come on its labelle I'm quite literally the last eligible boy on earth?"

"If I was an eligible lady, I'd still pick the black dom boys or the piuets over you whitey"

"Thanks" I sighed