Let It Chase Me (1)

I Held Her There

"Hello?"

"Ems, is that you? Where are you right now?"

She was sobbing.

"I'm at my apartment. Are you okay?"

Silence.

"Xana? Are you there? Do you need help?"

"It's Andy..."

I don't think I had ever driven that fast. I grabbed River and immediately went when Xana said Andy's name. I didn't know what happened, but I knew it couldn't have been good.

We arrived at the hospital in minutes. I spotted Xana and ran to her. 

"Xana, darling" was all I said. She fell into my arms sobbing. 

"They won't let me in. Ems, they won't let me see him" she said between cries. 

All I did was hold her. I couldn't feel my body, but I wasn't about to make it about me. This was about Andy.

We all sat together and cried, just waiting for what they were going to tell us.

A few hours went by before anyone came to talk to us. I held Xana again. When she went into the room, I walked over to the phone. I had to tell Chris. I thought about how he was going to react. How his face would fall and his bottom lip would quiver. 

I shook the thought out of my head. I couldn't not tell him.

"Hello?"

"Chris?"

"M&M! How are you?"

I ignored the question.

"What are you doing right now?" I asked.

"About to go eat with the guys. Finally got some time to ourselves."

"That's nice. Um, can you sit down for me?" I asked. I didn't want him to collapse. I really didn't know if he would or not. 

"I'm sitting. What's wrong?"

"Chris, you need to come home. It's Andy."

I waited a moment for him to respond. I didn't know what I expected him to say, but I was worried about him.

"I'll be home tomorrow."

The tone of the phone was all I heard after that. I hung up the phone and walked outside of the hospital. I really needed a cigarette.

March 19 came and left, but the hurt forever stayed.