Let It Chase Me (1)

Healing

I woke up in Chris' bed. I looked around the room, but he wasn't there. I pulled the covers down and felt a chill. Oh shit, I forgot I was naked. 

I searched the room for something to wear. I found one of Chris' sweaters and slipped it on. I walked out of the room to search for Chris. 

"Corn? You here?" I asked out as I walked into the kitchen. I didn't see him, but there was a note on the counter. 

M&M,

Soundgarden stuff to do today

I'll see you later

You can stay if you'd like to :)

-Corn

I smiled to myself when I read it. I didn't know what I wanted with him, but last night wasn't bad at all.

I decided to call Stone. I hadn't seen him in a few days and needed to check on him. 

"Hello?" 

That's not Stone's voice. 

"Uh, hi, I'm looking for Stone?"

"Ems?"

"River?"

"Yeah, I can get Stone if you want me to. I think he's sleeping though."

"Oh no that's okay, Rivs. So, is this where you've been sneaking off to?" I asked with a smirk.

"Maybe, maybe not. How's you and Chris by the way?" they asked jokingly back at me.

"Okay okay, we can touch on this topic later, take care of Stone for me" I said before we hung up the phone. 

"Guess we're all hooking up with each other" I said out loud to myself. I decided I needed a shower and something to eat. 

"I don't think he'll mind if I use his soap" I said stepping into the shower. The warm water cascaded down my body. I stood there for a few moments just letting the water surround me.

"I'm going hungry, yeah I'm going hungry" I sang out loud. It came to me from no where. I guess I'm hungry for life to go back to normal. I want Andy back and my band. I'm starving for the life that was ripped from my hands. 

I got out of the shower and put Chris' sweater back on. I walked out into the kitchen and found a notepad to write that down. I didn't know if anything could come from it, but I still wrote it down.

I searched through the fridge and cabinets for something to cook. I decided I wanted to cook for Chris too. I didn't know how he was going to feel about this whole thing we made happen, but I knew he still needed help through Andy's passing. This was never going to be easy.

-Chris' POV-

I stopped at Stone's place on the way home. River answered the door and seemed shocked to see me. I smiled at them and asked if I could come in. 

Stone was sitting in the living room with his guitar in his hands. He smiled at me as he saw me come in. 

"Hey man, I just wanted to come and make sure you weren't keeping yourself down" I said while sitting next to him. 

"No no, I'm doing okay. I'm better than yesterday" he said turning back to his guitar.

We sat for a few moments together in silence before Stone spoke up again. 

"I'm thinking of starting another band."

I looked over at him with curiosity. His eyes stayed on his guitar and he started speaking again.

"I don't think Andy would want me to quit. He'd say I was a wimp for quitting."

"I was thinking of doing a tribute to Andy" I said to Stone. "I think it could be a really nice way to say goodbye to him."

"I would like to do that. But I don't want my new band to be a tribute. Maybe just a side project?" He said towards me.

"Yeah," I said smiling to him. "A side project." 

We sat and talked through some ideas for the project. I let Stone tell me about his ideas for a new band. I thought it was a great idea. Now we have to get ahold of Jeff and see if he'd like to join. 

Rivs said they would step in if Jeff decided he didn't want any part of the project. I was thankful for that. I didn't want to push Jeff during this time, but I'm really hoping he will join Stone's band. They rock together and could make something wonderful.

After a little while, I decided it was time for me to go home. I didn't know if Ems would still be there or not, but I hoped she was. I wanted to talk about what had happened and what it means for the future. 

When I arrived home, I saw Ems sleeping on the couch. I didn't want to wake her, so I sat next to her and watched the tv that was on. After a few minutes I felt her stir beside me. She slowly sat up and rubbed her eyes. She gave me a tired smile.

"Hi Corn" she said in a soft voice. 

"Hi M&M, how was your day?" I asked as she scooted closer to me, laying her head on my shoulder. 

"Boring, all I did was shower, eat, and sleep" she said. "I kept having a phrase repeat in my head though. I wrote it down, but I don't know if anything will come of it. 'I'm going hungry' just over and over again."

I sat and thought about her words. I wanted to know what they meant to her, but I didn't want to push. 

"I miss how life used to be" she said after some time. "I guess I'm hungry for the way life was a few months ago. It was so much easier."

"Yeah, I know how you feel" was all I could bring myself to say. I agreed with her. I wanted it to all be how it was months ago, before everything happened. "But we can't dwell on that" I said to her. "We have to keep living, if not for ourselves, then for Andy."

She looked up at me with a smile. "For Andy" she repeated back to me. I leaned down and gave her a soft kiss. 

"That reminds me," she started, "we should probably figure out whatever the hell this is."

I smiled down at her. "Yeah you're right. What should it be?" I asked her.

She sat up completely and played with the sleeves of the sweater she was wearing. 

"Well, last night was a lot of fun, but I'm not sure if we're meant to be like totally together" she said not looking at me. I smiled at her again. 

"I agree," I said towards her. "So we can be friends that occasionally have sex, unless of course you don't want to again. Maybe we just heal together and then go back to being strictly friends" I said. 

She looked up at me and smiled brightly. She threw her arms around my neck. "I think that's a great idea" she said to me. I wrapped her in a tight hug. 

She pulled back slightly and I took that opportunity to kiss her.

"Let's go heal some more" I said before leading her back to my bedroom.