Little Secrets, Little Bucky

Just An Accident

Bucky leaned entirely against her as she read and Y/n reached for the stack of books that she had bought. Big Bucky loved reading so she assumed that little Bucky would love it too. Turned out that little Bucky liked being read to even more than doing it himself. They sat there for hours, as Bucky insisted on appreciating every single illustration and asking about a hundred questions about each page. But Y/n didn't mind, she patiently answered every question and let the excited little boy gaze at each picture for as long as he wanted.

They had worked their way through most of the stack when Bucky began to wiggle around, but Y/n thought nothing of it. He was probably just a little restless. He picked out yet another book and she began reading.

About halfway through The Very Hungry Caterpillar, Bucky gasped and pressed a hand down hard on his crotch. Y/n stopped reading as he got up and bolted to the bathroom slamming the door behind him. She sighed, they would definitely need to have a talk later about him trying to hold it so long when he was little. It wasn't really his fault though, she understood that he'd just been excited about the books and all of the apple juice just caught up a little faster than he thought it would. While she waited for him to come out of the bathroom, she gathered up the discarded toy packaging and brought the dirty dishes to the sink. But after 15 minutes she got worried and went to knock on the bathroom door.

"Is everything ok, honey?" She asked.

No response.

"Bucky, I need you to answer me," still nothing. "If you don't answer me I'll have to have Jarvis unlock the door, I need to know you're safe."

"Don't," she heard his tiny voice choke out. It sounded like he was...crying? But why would he be crying?

Oh.

"Sweetheart, did you not make it all the way to the potty?" She asked gently, trying not to upset him even more than he clearly was. All she got in response was a choked sob and she knew she had guessed right. The poor boy was probably terrified, not to mention uncomfortable. "Oh Bucks, it's ok." She said, "I'm going to grab you some clean clothes." He still didn't respond, so she went and grabbed him a new pair of pants and boxers. When she returned she knocked on the door again. "I got you some clothes, can you open the door please sweetheart?"

"No," he cried, and Y/n's heart clenched in her chest at the fear in his voice.

"Why can't you open the door?" She asked patiently.

"Don't want you to see. Gonna hurt."

"I won't hurt you, I promise," she was even more sure now that someone had mistreated him in the past. Why would she ever hurt him, especially just because he had an accident? "I won't even look if you don't want me to. I'll just hand you the clothes and let you get cleaned up ok? You can put your wet clothes at the bottom of the hamper where I can't see them."

Bucky cracked open the door just enough to let the clothes pass through and then slammed it shut again. He got himself cleaned up, stuffing his wet pants and underwear deep into the laundry basket, and then just sat there on the bathroom floor, trying to get big again. But it was no use, he was too scared and too deep in his headspace. He curled up and buried his head in his knees, unsure of what to do next. There was a knock at the door again.

"Are you done changing?"

"Yeah," it came out as more of a sob than a word and he cringed at his own weakness.

"Can you come out sweetheart?" She pleaded with him, "You're not in trouble I promise."

Bucky knew he shouldn't open the door. But all he wanted was the comfort that Y/n seemed to exude. He wanted to be held, to be picked up and told that it was ok, that she knew he couldn't help it and he had just made a mistake. But he knew that mistakes like these couldn't go unpunished.