Little Secrets, Little Bucky

Domestic Life

Bucky woke up the following day in Y/n's arms. His eyes were still heavy, and he nuzzled into her shirt instinctively.

"Good morning," she said softly, earning a sleepy hum from Bucky. "Are you big or little, angel?"

Bucky whined in response, feeling much too tired and fuzzy to figure that out. "I dunno," he mumbled, voice rough from sleep. "M'sorry."

"You don't need to be sorry," she assured him. "Why don't you go back to sleep, and we'll figure it out together when you aren't so sleepy." Bucky nodded and let out a deep sigh when she held him closer. "I've got you," she whispered as he slipped back into the peaceful state of sleeping.

When Bucky woke up for the second time that morning, everything was much clearer than before. Y/n had been right, he just needed to go back to sleep. He sat up and stretched, watching as Y/n did the same. "Thank you," he said quietly. "For, well, for everything."

"You don't have to thank me," she responded. "Why don't you go and get cleaned up so we can talk about yesterday?"

Bucky nodded and got out of bed. "Are, um, are my..." His face flushed bright red. "Do you still keep, uh-"

"Buck," Y/n interrupted, laughing a little at his flustered expression. "Yes, I still keep boxers and sweatpants in the third drawer down for you."

"Oh thank god," he breathed out. "I'll be right back."

Before long he had returned, hair still wet from his shower. He sat down on the bed beside Y/n, who was in the middle of sending an email. She finished up quickly and leaned back into the pillows, watching as Bucky followed her lead.

"How do you feel about yesterday?" She asked, knowing that they needed to discuss what had happened. She was pretty sure he'd never felt that small before and needed to make sure he was alright about the way she had handled it.

"Being that small should've been terrifying, and it was terrifying at first," he started. "But somehow you made it feel okay. You made me feel safe and loved, like I really wasn't a burden on you."

Y/n smiled at him lovingly. "My baby is never a burden," she said softly. "I told you Buck, I love taking care of you."

"Yeah but yesterday was a whole new level," Bucky said, awe present in his voice. "I couldn't even talk, well, except for your name, but you understood me anyway. And you didn't get mad at me, even when I puked on your shoulder."

"You didn't puke," she laughed. "You spit up a little bit, there's a difference. Babies do that, and mamas fix it."

Her words made Bucky's face flush red, and he fought the urge to hide under the covers. Why did she have to say such soft things to him? She made it sound like taking care of him, like loving him was just a natural part of life. It wasn't something she had to think about.

"You're a really good mama," he said quietly. "I never thought I could have a caregiver like you. Someone who could make me feel safe while I was little instead of afraid."

Y/n felt tears burning in her eyes and smiled at Bucky sadly. "I wish I had been your only caregiver," she whispered. "I wish I could've spared you from what they did."

"I know you would've," Bucky said quietly, looking down at his hands. "I know that if you had the chance you would've saved me." Y/n reached out, opening her arms wide in silent invitation, and Bucky didn't hesitate to hold on tight. He rested his head on her chest and let out a shaky breath, focusing on the way her arms tightened around him. "I love you," he whispered. "I love you more than I'll ever be able to say."