Dalaiah's name is pronounced Del-i-uh, so when you see "Dal" in this chapter as a nickname, just know it's pronounced del
"Luke, can you help me with this?" I asked, pointing at the word problem in my math work I was stuck on.
He nodded, leaning over and glancing at the problem, "Do you need help reading it or solving it?"
"Both," I admitted. He smiled and scooted closer to me, about to say something but was cut off by the door opening and the three lanky, loud, and awkward boys stumbling into the room.
"Guys," Luke yelled, attempting to pull their attention. Calum stumbled over to the couch, falling onto the seat next to me as Ashton laughed loudly and Michael began to yell at him. "Guys!" Luke yelled loudly, "We're trying to study."
"We know, dumbass," Michael laughed, sitting next to Luke on the couch, "Your mum sent us to get you guys. You've been in here for over an hour and she doesn't like you to work on homework for that long."
"Yeah, something about resting your brain," Ashton laughed, leaning on the back of the couch.
"So, come on, take a break and we can go play Fifa," Calum pouted, "and I'll kick your ass."
"No you won't," Luke laughed, setting the textbook on the table and getting up, following Calum out of the room. Michael ran behind them but Ashton stayed.
I continued to struggle to read the problem. "Dal, take a break," Ashton said, coming around the couch to sit next to me. His hair was still plastered down to his forehead slightly from sweat after performing.
"Dal?" I laughed, looking up at him.
He nodded with a smile, "It's a nickname. But, seriously, take a break."
I sighed and placed my notebook on the table next to Luke's, "What do you want to do?"
He slung his arm around my shoulder, "You made a promise to me the other day... About showing me something."
Our conversation from only a couple days ago flashed to my mind. I had promised to show him my suicide attempt scars. I can't break a promise. I looked down at my feet as I stood up from the couch. I grabbed his hand and pulled him up, beginning to drag him from the room with no explanation.
"Where are we going?" he asked.
"The bathroom," I said, "I can't show you in here. Someone might walk in."
He nodded as I dragged him down the hallway, making sure no one was around before dragging him into the large bathroom. I flicked on the light and shut the door, locking it.
I hesitated, reconsidering showing him. Was I even comfortable enough with my body to do this?
"Dal, are you comfortable to do this?" he asked me.
I shook my head, "I'm not, but I need to do this. I need to be more open. I just don't want you to ever bring this up to the other boys unless I talk about it, okay?"
He nodded, "I promise."
I sighed and I gripped the ends of my shirt, "And nothing awkward between us."
He nodded, repeating my words, "Nothing awkward between us." I slowly lifted my shirt from my body, dropping it on the floor. All along my hips were scars from my only suicide attempt of trying to bleed myself to death."Are there more?" he whispered. I nodded, grabbing the band of my sweatpants and slipping them down. All the way from my hips down to nearly my knees were long white scars. "That's a lot," Ashton whispered, looking carefully at the white lines.
"I know," I said, bending down and pulling the hem of my sweatpants back up to rest on my waist. Ashton handed me my shirt and I thanked him, wiping away a single tear and slipping my shirt back on.
"Come here," Ashton whispered, pulling me into a tight hug. I buried my face into his chest as he held me tightly. "Thank you for showing me," he whispered, "I'm always here for you. All the boys are. We love you."
"I love you guys, too," I whispered, pulling away from him.
He smiled and wiped away the few tears that fell from my eyes, "Do you want to go do something fun with the boys now?"
"They're playing Fifa," I said.
He shook his head with a grin, "We'll get them to do something else."
"Okay fine," I said, "you go out first though just to make sure no one's there."
"This would be awkward to explain," he laughed quietly, walking over to the door and opening it just a bit before turning back to me and nodding. I walked over to the door and slipped out of the room, only stopping to turn off the lights. "Let's go," he smiled, wrapping his arm around my shoulder.We walked down the hallway slowly until we got to the lounge room where the boys were still setting up the game.
"Change of plans," Ashton announced, "We're gonna play a game so we can all do something together."
"Sure. We can't get the game system to hook up the TV anyhow," Luke shrugged.
"I say we go full-on grade school and play hide-and-go-seek," Michael laughed.
"Not it!" I yelled.
"Not it!" Michael.
"Not it!" Calum.
"Not it!" Ashton.
"Not it!" Luke. We all ran off, leaving Luke to count to 30 before he came to find us.
