BLACK MOON ⍋ Remus Lupin

Chapter NinetySix- Too Much.

Sirius eventually left and I could finally take myself to bed. The weight of his feelings not making my body feel any lighter.

Why couldn't we have all just left? All of us cut the ties we were being controlled by? What led Bellatrix and Regulus down a destructive path and what led Sirius, Andromeda and I down ours? Where was Narcissa's?

What made us different from each other?

These thoughts clouded and dominated the thoughts that preoccupied my mind beforehand; how to show Remus I was falling in love with him.

Part of me wishes I never went to collect the chocolate to hand to him. Then I wouldn't have been responsible for seeing what I had. For worrying about Regulus.

I could have remained in peaceful ignorance. Not being taught about the Knights of whatever they were called; the death eaters. Especially because I was learning my family had connections within it. I had no idea and wish it stayed that way.

-

Friday finally came along and I had received a phone call to invite me to the pub, just like Remus had said. I knew he wasn't coming, not quite sure what he was up to but not wanting to be incredibly nosey. He promised me we would have our date next weekend and I will hold him to it.

I didn't know whether I wanted to go without him. I didn't want to feel as if I was taking his place, like an understudy. Though I felt like Sirius would appreciate me being there.

And for that reason I began to get ready.

Once I was I went up and over to knock on Sonny and Dorcas' flat.

"Hiya!" Dorcas said as she opened the door.

"Are you guys coming to the pub tonight?" I asked.

"Oh I'm not sure? Sonny!" She called for him.

"Yeah?" I heard him call back.

"Are we going to the pub tonight?"

"Can do if you want?"

Dorcas nodded.

"We'll meet you there, how about that? We're having dinner late." She laughed and pointed at her polka dot apron.

At least I can be around more people I'm comfortable around. Not quite yet comfortable around the old group and with more people joining, the less I'll feel like Remus' replacement.

I arrived at the hogshead by floo. The choice of pub for the night.

The sky was clear and still light, it being a warm august evening. A light breeze graced the air, which was fresher than the air in the city. I much preferred it. It reminded me of being outside at Hogwarts within that first month of September.

I lingered outside for a little bit, gaining the courage to go inside on my own. I wish Sonny and Dorcas could have walked in with me.

"Hi Art." Suddenly James pushed open the door.
"Window." He gestured to the window next to me, meaning they've seen me waiting here aimlessly.

An embarrassed redness flushed my face.

"Don't be embarrassed. I'll stand out here with you for a bit if you want, it's quite nice." He said and lightly pushed me over, creating a space for him away from the door. Both of us now leaning against the wall.

"Rem told me you asked him out on a date." James spoke up again.

"He did?" I was a little shocked. I had wondered whether he would keep us secret. People knew there was tension between us, but that was the same with Lily and James and as far as I was aware that was a reoccurring joke.