Eli Borrelli

21: Demons

Eli POV.

"If you won't change, God can't love you anymore," The bearded man said with a shake of his head.

"But don't worry. I am sure that with our help, you are going to get better. We can fix you," he said reaching out to gently touch my hand.

I just nodded, turning my gaze to the floor. I didn't know why I was there, but I just was.  I remember the long drive and finally mom and dad leaving me with this man. I think his name might have been Matthew, or maybe something completely different.

"You seem like a good kid. You have straight A's, you play the violin and piano, so why would you choose the path away from God?" Matthew asked.

"I don't mean to," I said scared.

I really didn't I didn't want to go away from God, I wanted him to love me. I wanted nothing more than to be the perfect child my parents and God wanted me to be, but I always found myself in situations like those. 

"Of course, you didn't, but that's what has happened, so why don't you tell me about what happened at school," Matthew said leaning back in his chair. 

I hung my head in shame, nervously tugging at the hem of my long skirt. I didn't like the clothes they made me wear, but they said God likes them, so I guess that's all, that mattered.

"I saw some of the boys playing in the field, and it looked fun," I said wanting to beat myself up over and over again.

How could I have been so stupid? I knew better than that, yet I did it.

"What were they playing?" 

"Football," I simply said, pulling at my skin. I was hoping to be able to rip it off completely and switch with someone better. Someone, who my parents could love, someone who was worth something.

"And you joined them?" Matthew asked already knowing the answer.

"Yes... I didn't know, that it was wrong, I wasn't thinking," I said preparing to cry.

Mum always told me not to play with the boys and not to do boy things, but I went and did it anyway. Now they're going to hate me, everyone will.

"Devil, leave this child alone! Leave her, and let her live!" Matthew screamed as he repeatedly smacked me with a wallet.

The other kids stood around us, taking turns hitting me themselves. I wanted to cry, but dad told me never to cry, so I held it in. He didn't want me to be weak, so I couldn't cry. I wouldn't.

"Leave Serena alone, Satan!"

"Take the evil in her with you!"

"There's no room for you in God's world, Satan!"

As the screaming went on, and the smacks became more and more violent, I finally let the tears fall. I wanted nothing more than for it to work. I wanted this demon to leave my body, and take the wrongs of me with him. I wanted God to love me again, I wanted mom and dad to love me again.

I tugged a lost strand of hair behind my ear and cleared my throat.

"In front of you all, I ask the Lord to forgive my sins," I started.

I was standing in front of all the kids at the facility. I was by far, the youngest at nine years old, but that just made me feel worse. I was just nine, and already so far away from God. I straightened my gray dress once again and quietly began: