Flowers (krbkdk angst soulmate au)

22

“Are you feeling any better?” Midoriya asked.

“Only a little. Still mostly feel like shit. Feeling better’s a lot harder than it’s supposed to be.”

“Yeah, it can be,” Midoriya said, giving him a gentle smile.

“This happens to you too, right?”

“You mean depressive episodes?” Bakugo nodded. “Yeah, they do. I had them more when I  was a bit younger than I do now though.”

“What would you do? How’d you get through it?”

“I had different things I’d try to do. I’ve been going through the list with you already, actually: Getting you in clean clothes, taking a shower, trying to get some food in you.”

“I’m fucking tired of feeling like this. Can we,” Bakugo paused, “Do more stuff from that list?”

Midoriya nodded. “How ‘bout cleaning your room up a bit? I’m here to help so it shouldn’t be so bad.”

Bakugo nodded and pulled himself up from the bed, awkwardly standing as if he was waiting for Midoriya to tell him what to do (because he was). Noticing, Midoriya said, “How about you pick up some of the dirty laundry, and I’ll work on the dirty dishes?”

After half an hour of cleaning, Bakugo’s room was still nowhere near what would be considered a properly-clean room, but it had made much progress. There were no longer clothes scattered across the floor, nor were there dishes on every possible surface. The clean clothes hadn’t been folded, but at least they had been put in drawers, and the other items laying across the floor hadn’t been put in proper spots exactly, but at least they were in the closet where they weren’t visible, weighing down the whole room.

Just as they were finishing up cleaning the room, Bakugo looked over to see Midoriya about to pick up a book off the floor. One specific book Bakugo kept there for a reason. “Wait! Don’t-” Bakugo said. It was half a second too late, and Midoriya had already picked up the book. “Please don’t be mad at me,” Bakugo pleaded.

“I’m not mad,” Midoriya said, picking up the blade off the floor from where it had been hidden underneath the book. Bakugo could feel his heartbeat speeding up, and his whole body was going tingly. With the giant lump in his stomach, it felt as if he was going to puke. “I’m not going to take it, unless you say you’re okay with that,” Midoriya said, shocking Bakugo. “Are you okay with that?” Bakugo shook his head, scared to even open his mouth with how nauseous he had gotten. “Okay,” Midoriya said, “I still need you to tell me, are there any others in here?” Bakugo nodded.

“Underneath my lamp, and behind that poster,” Bakugo said, pointing to the wall, and trying to ignore how much his hand was shaking. “And one in the middle drawer of my desk, underneath the pens, and the last one’s in the back of my notebook for school. In my backpack.” Midoriya nodded, not showing any positive or negative reaction to Bakugo’s words.

“I’m not going to take these,” Midoriya said. “But, I’m going to clean all of them, and we’re gonna find somewhere more sanitary to put them. Is that okay?”

Bakugo nodded again, following Midoriya to the bathroom where he washed the blades and wiped them down with rubbing alcohol. When they returned to the room, Bakugo suggested they put them in his bedside table, but Midoriya refused.

“We should find somewhere farther away from your bed. As a safety measure.”

Eventually they settled on putting them in a plastic bag and set it in the window sill behind the curtain. It wasn’t like Bakugo was worried about his parents taking them, so the placement didn’t particularly matter. The only reason they had been hidden so all-over-the-place in the first place was because he’d been worried about Kirishima or Midoriya taking them. Typically, seeing his blades didn’t trigger him unless it was one he hadn’t seen in a long time or one he had come across accidentally which he was thankful for, and even if he hadn’t been using them, knowing that the blades weren’t there usually made him panic or relapse. It was the main reason he hadn’t gotten rid of them, even after starting recovery with Kirishima and Midoriya’s help.