Disenchantment Sagas

Bounty Hunter Bean Part 1

"Oh my goodness, Is she dead?"

"Isn't that how she always looks?"

"What about that green thing next to her? Isn't that the elf?"

"Aww, that poor dead kitty...." 

"Wait, I think she's coming to...."

Bean let out a sluggish groan as she opened her eyes. At first, her eyes met the blinding sunlight in the blue sky. And then, her eyes adjusted to the crowd of people hovering over her, Elfo and Luci. "Ooooh man...my head is killing me..." She groaned as she rubbed her forehead. "What the hell happened?" She slowly rose, and her blurry vision began to focus. Bean was staring at the shocked faces of Dreamland citizens that were staring at her. She looked to the left, seeing Elfo still passed out. She then looked to the right, seeing Luci still passed out. That's when Bean began looking at her surroundings.

Bean, Elfo, and Luci were all laid out before a destroyed royal carriage in the middle of the Dreamland plaza. "Oooh...oh man...." She said in a worried tone. "Oh, I'm so dead...." 

Elfo and Luci were now beginning to wake up. Elfo yawned and looked at everyone: "Hi, everybody! Ow, my head!" He then looked at the broken carriage: "Oh man, what a crazy night we had!" 

Luci laughed. "Nice job on the carriage leap, Bean! You weren't kidding when you said you drive better when drunk!"

The trio and the crowd of people heard clanking footsteps coming their way. It was the knights of Dreamland, followed by an angry-looking older woman. "There they are! Those are the ruffians that stole my carriage when I was still in it!" said Lady Lingonberry, pointing at the three. Bean, Elfo, and Luci gasped, and then Bean said, "Come on, guys, it's time to book it!" She said hastily as the trio quickly got to their feet and were about to run but were surrounded by more knights that appeared. "Ah crap..." said Bean as she slumped.

"Oh wow, we're screwed!" said Elfo with a laugh.

Bean, Elfo, and Luci were all escorted back to the castle and were taken straight into the throne room where her father, King Zog of Dreamland, stood with his fist against his lips, baring his usual angry expression. "Well, what do we have here?" He said as he stepped away from his throne and got closer to Bean. "The spoiled, ungrateful brat who decides to leave her princess duties to get drunk with her two weird little friends!"

Bean rolled her eyes. "Daddy, please, I'm sorry, ok? We drank way too much and got carried away. It won't happen again, and I'm going to cut back on drinking!" 

"You're drinking right now!" said Zog, pointing to Bean's right hand, which had a Beer mug.

Bean looked to her right hand, which had a beer mug. "Where did that come from?" She asked. Luci would say, "You're welcome!" with a smirk. Bean would shrug and chug the whole drink, which further angered her father.

"What in the hell am I going to do with you, Bean?" he said as he rubbed between his eyes. "You go out and cause so much trouble. Why can't you be like your older brother and start taking your duties as royalty seriously!"

"And be a pretentious dick like him? Yeah, no thanks," said Bean, "I'm going to go inside and get a hot emerald message." Bean walked past her father, but Zog grabbed Bean by her arm, stopping her.

"Oh no, you don't, wise guy!" said Zog, "You aren't going anywhere because I am banishing you from this castle! You're a good-for-nothing, and you ain't worth nothing! And you aren't returning to this castle till you appreciate all the money I poured into you!"

"FINE!" Bean yelled. "I don't need you! I don't need ANYBODY!" She screamed at the top of her lungs before she marched off. Elfo and Luci follow close behind.