~ damiano david imagines ~

withdrawal

damiano promised me he would stop smoking so i promised him i would help him, i wanted to help him but seeing him go through withdrawal made me want to die.

"PLEASE!" he was shaking, sobbing at the kitchen table with his head in his hands,

"dami.. you know i wish i could help you but one leads to two, two leads to three.. you know how it goes.." i wiped away my own tears, i hated seeing him like this..

"PLEASE! PLEASE JUST ONE CIGARETTE!" he looked at me his eyes a puffy, eyeliner stained mess.

"dami.." my voice broke and i stopped holding back the tears i could, letting all of them flood my cheeks,

"it's so hard.." he whispered..

i collapsed down to the floor, sliding my back down the kitchen cabinets..

"i know dami.. i know.."

***

i woke up cradling damiano in my arms, after the meltdown last night i just wanted to hold him and protect him..

"goodmorning.." i sighed and kissed his temples, he had big bags under his eyes and his eyes were glossy..

"morning.." he hummed i rubbed my hands on his stomach, something i used to do when we were teenagers to calm him down when he would have nightmares.. he used to have god awful nightmares.

"did you get any sleep last night?" i saw his heavy eyelids starting to close, "no but hopefully you'll get some now," i giggled and continued rubbing his stomach.

***

i was talking with Victoria outside when I smelled the familiar smell of cigarettes..

"that better be thomas.." i said standing up and following the smell, sure enough it led to thomas,

"oh thank god it's just you thommy.. i was worried damiano had relapsed.."

"merda!" i heard the familiar voice of my boyfriend of 6 years,

"what happened?" thomas called out around the corner to where damiano was hiding on the other side of the fence.

"burned my hand god damnit," he said walking out from around the fence to where me, victoria, and thomas were standing

i looked at his already blistering hand, he was till holding the burning cig, i threw it out of his hand and stomped on it before grabbing his wrist and dragging him into the house, all while not saying a word.

i turned on the tap and quickly put my finger under the running water, not hot but not cold, perfect for a burn. i gestured to the water to which damiano promptly stuck his hand under the water, i saw him slightly relax at it's touch and i crouched down to get the first aid kit from underneath the sink.

"i'm sorry" he mumbled as i stood back up and turned off the tap, i dried off his hand and lightly wrapped it up,

"better?" i said, he slowly nodded..

"you're not mad?" he said, his eyes beginning to water,

"no damiano i'm not mad, i'm fucking pissed, how could you do this, after all we've been through!"

"it was just a moment of weakness!"

"damiano i want to believe you, but i can't.. it's never just a moment" i walked out of the kitchen and into my office, i locked the door and sat on the floor, i let myself melt down, sobbing and all.

after i calmed down i ran into me and damiano's shared bedroom, and into our bathroom, i splashed some water on my face and saw damiano asleep on our bed, his cheeks were tear stained and the bandages on his hand were torn up,