𝐑𝐔𝐍𝐀𝐖𝐀𝐘 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒// 𝒋𝒋 𝒎𝒂𝒚𝒃𝒂𝒏𝒌

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At around 12pm Violet was finally smelling like a human being not a public toilet and she was in clean clothes that smelled like JJ. Violet had stopped the car in the back close to the hammocks, the music was turned up all the way and she and JJ were laughing their asses off. She was laid on the hammock next to his with a fluffy pillow underneath her head, a blunt in her right hand and a can of monster in the other. To say that she was high would be an understatement.

"I have missed this JJ." She said and JJ looked at her, his smile froze. He was trying hard not to bring up what has happened but he couldn't pretend that nothing has happened and it just couldn't be the same as it was. She hurt his feeling very much.

"Why did you do it?" He said and stood up from the mattress, taking the last drag from his blunt and throwing it on the ground. Violet sat down and JJ grabbed her phone pausing the music.

"What do you mean?" JJ looked at her not believing her. Was she playing dumb? Why was she doing this?

"Why are you playing dumb?" Violet stood up, leaving her Monster to the side. She really had no idea what he meant.

"JJ I tried calling and texting but you blocked my number so I couldn't. I really wanted to stay in touch with you, I wanted nothing more than to stay in touch with you all." JJ just shook his head, the tears filling his eyes, he kept on shaking his head and just wouldn't look at her. "You don't know what I've been through all this months that I was in California J." JJ pointed at her and finally looked at her, she could see the tears in his eyes, and felt a tug at her heart. He looked so broken.

"You?" He asked and a let out a slight chuckle. "Do you have any idea what I've been through? I lost my best friend and the only person that I have ever fell in love, the only person, who made me happy and made me feel like I belonged and that I was worthy of love just took off in the middle of the day, without saying a word, made me wait for her in the damn rain for 2 hours, would not pick up her phone and read my massages. Would." JJ stopped for a second and groaned with his hands on his head as he looked up to the sky and then down at her, continuing. "And when she finally read my massages, she fucking told me that all that we ever had was a fucking mistake and that she never really loved me, that I was just a distraction and she would never come back again, and that she had never loved me. That she was faking everything. So no Violet. I did not block your number, you did, after you made me feel worthless and disgusting, so yeah. I've missed this but it was never really real was it?" Violet just sat there, her gaze was locked on somewhere behind him, nothing in particular just the darkness. Her mouth was slightly agape and she just couldn't believe what her mom had put her through. Both of them. She shook her head and felt the tears run down her cheeks, she quickly brushed the off and stood up walking to JJ, who took a step back. He looked heartbroken. His lower lip was in between his teeth, his tears were streaming down his face. She had promised to always love him and never give him a reason to cry. She had promised him that she was always going to be there but yet in the hardest moment of his life, she wasn't there. She wasn't there when he needed her the most. It wasn't because she didn't wanted to, it was because her mom just didn't let her. Because her mom had decided that Violet wes her property, not her daughter.

"JJ I know it will sound crazy, but I didn't send any messages to you or received any phone calls." JJ just chuckled and and shook his head.

"Why are you doing this to me? Haven't you done enough? I had just started to forget about you, started to live normaly. I finally got to the point where you aren't the first thing I think about when I wake up, well I did still thought about you before I went to sleep, that's why it's hard to fall asleep, but I was going to managed that just fine in the next couple of months, but no." JJ shouted at her and pointed at her. "You decided to show up again! Now everything in my life is once again for you! Every damn-" his voice broke and Violet finally let her tears fall. She just didn't believe how she had let this happen. "Every damn thought that goes through my mind since the moment you came back, is about you." He said softly and wiped off his tears. Violet walked to him and put a hand on his chest and looked at him.

"JJ. Please listen to me. Can you sit down please. We really have to talk about this." She said and JJ just sat down quickly lighting up another blunt and taking a drag. She sat next to him and just sighed deeply.

"Look I really needed to forget about this but I have to tell you okay. I don't think that you'll hate me less or anything like that." JJ shook his head. He could never hate her. Never. "Remember that night. We had a date at 5pm, so I got ready at around 4 and just laid around watching 'The walking dead' as I usually do. You know me. So the doorbell rang at around 4:30 and it was my mom, she looked very suspicious, but I let her in, I thought that if I did we would talk and she will finally understand that I want to be here with dad." She said and took a deep breath, JJ handed her the blunt and she took a drag and exhaled the smoke.

"She came in and wanted to make us coffee, so I said okay, so she handed me a cup of coffee and I just drank it and next thing I know, I blacked out." She said and JJ quickly looked at her. He almost dropped the can in his hand to the ground. He looked at her and could see the tears rolling down her eyes. "Next thing I know I woke up in my bedroom in California with a bag next to my bed with all of my things from here, she locked me in my room that night, and the next day I got signed up for a therapist and I had been prescribed drugs for my stomach pain. But they didn't help me with that, they made it worse and made my head spin and I spend my days most of my time in a daze, I really don't remember anything." JJ had noticed her shaking legs and quickly grabbed both of them and started rubbing circles on her thighs. He could feel his own tears, wetting his cheeks.

"Probably a week before the whole John B and Sarah thing i found the bottle with the pills. They had my mom's name on them and were for people with PTSD." Violet stopped talking she couldn't talk about this anymore, she was overwhelmed from the thoughts that ran in her mind and the anxiety that was overtaking her.

"She was drugging you?" JJ whispered and Vi nodded. "Jesus Christ Vi." He whispered and just pulled her close.

"I never wanted this JJ. All i ever wanted was you, and it broke my heart that you didn't even text me once. But now I know why, and I'm sorry about the texts. I really have no idea what the texts are but I just want you to know that I really don't mean any of them and you are none of the things in them." JJ just let out a cry and then a smile appeared on his face, at least she really did love him back then.

"Did you go to the police?" Violet shook her head.

"The first opportunity I got, I left. That's the only thing I want. I only want to be here with y'all and my dad and never see her again."

JJ held her close to himself and was cursing himself mentally. Of course they weren't from her. It was clear from the gate go. But he was angry that she didn't show up and that she had ignored him so in his fit of anger he believed the text, how could he be so stupid and not sense that something was so damn wrong.

"You are here with us, now Vi. And you won't ever see her again, I promise. I won't let her take you away from me." Violet hugged him tighter and JJ just planted a kiss on her forehead, wiping off her tears.

He felt safe again, right here in her arms. He felt like he had everything.