225: You Will Never Look at Anything the Same

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Shine was tired like the others, but her inspiration for passing on wisdom never dulled no matter what went on, and she rather hoped the two old souls would come to her.

But as it happened, Oscar also wanted to speak to her.

"I couldn't even... begin to say how grateful I am that you both showed up for me," he said. "And you stuck it out. I almost thought it would never actually happen, but you always believed it."

"I had doubts, same as you," Shine said. "I'm only human. I felt afraid many times that we'd be too late. I even had nightmares about it."

"Really?" Oscar said. "You never said..."

"No, not to you," Shine said. "I wouldn't have wanted you to think they were omens. Gift of prophecy or insight or not Oscar, we all have demons that plague us. I'm not different than anyone else, but I didn't need to add to your fear with my own. We must show people what we believe in the most, not what we fear."

Oscar's mind was a lot clearer now that Ozma was out of it... and he realized finally that Shine was simply speaking the truth.

And he also, being a sensible boy, saw suddenly how often she must have been worried and tired and unsure since they arrived. How often it must have been hidden by her going off alone to think or pray, or by her sass, which he already knew was often a brave front.

Wally too, must have been uncertain so much more than you'd think to listen to him.

"To the end though, you faced the gods like it was nothing," he said.

"So did you," Shine said, looking him in the eye. "We both know why, Oscar. It wasn't us. Did you feel it was you against them? Or did you feel it was truth itself? And truth gives us power and courage and hope. Even with its difficulties there is a strength in truth that there is never going to be in a lie. You have the gift of knowing that better than other people, thank you for reminding me of it so many times along the way. I believe, if not for your faith in us and in who sent us, I might have felt I could never get anywhere with this mission. You gave us something to fight for."

Oscar looked somber. "I guess I did... somehow, but I still don't feel special."

Shine put her hand on his shoulders. "Because Oscar, you're not. I mean you have special gifts and personality, but you are still a human being. It's a good thing you don't feel any more so. When I go home, I'll just be myself, in my ordinary life again, and few people will ever know I was anything but that. And as it passes, few people will know or care about your accomplishments either. But remember that that is a good thing. Pyrrha could tell you that any of us who have the pressure going on too long are going to let people down, because we can't live up to it. If I was to give you one last piece of advice, it would be better to let this last year both shape you, and also to leave it to rest. You'll find your role as what you are supposed to be. A moment of greatness in life is usually fleeting. But to live out a truly excellent life, that is going to be something you will always have to choose to do. But it won't be, God willing, so difficult anymore."

She then ruffled his hair affectionately. "And you need to be able to take it easy again. The others will see it that way too. You have to learn how to be friends instead of warmates now. But that's also good. I wouldn't have it any other way as a teacher or leader, and God would have us live peacefully when we can. After all, He did make the world to be good and He made us to be good too. So the best service to Him is accepting that and making the most of the good in your life. The rest of it will come with time."

Oscar smiled faintly. "It's like you knew what I've been wondering to myself... I mean what comes next? Will I ever feel normal about this? I... do feel like me now, but it's like I told Ozma, it's not the same me as before. It never will be, will it."

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