[Complete] Noise and Kisses {chicklit}

19

After a tube change and a short walk, we make it to the gallery. The Saatchi is amazing, and I'm beside myself with joy and awe for these incredible artists. As we walk around, discussing the art surrounding us, Matt holds my hand. The small gesture is endearing and, as lovely as it is, I can't help but replay Ben's message in my head.

The photography by Cindy Sherman is striking and both Matt and I pour over it emphatically. I can't imagine Ben wanting to talk about Art in the same way. When we leave the gallery, we continue to walk around London to view the architecture and drink coffee.

"I love how passionate you get about stuff - you know?" Matt says, linking his arm around my waist and pulling me towards him. I smile but feel a pang of sadness, reminding me of something similar that Ben said months before.

"I like that you like that. Sometimes I catch myself and realise how stupid I sound, so I appreciate it."

"You don't sound stupid! Your eyes light up... it's pretty special." I can feel my cheeks heat. He stops to gently cup my face in his hands. He looks longingly into my eyes, and I can't help but glance away, the intensity too much to bear.

He laughs lightly, "I really like you Hols... if it wasn't already clear." I smile and lightly kiss him on the nose, which makes him wrinkle it. I giggle and he briefly kisses me on the lips, but the fluttering is overpowered by the sinking feeling in my broken heart.

We continue walking for a while, occasionally stopping to admire buildings or shops and Matt continues to offer small romantic touches before he suggests we go to dinner. I've enjoyed our time together, but my mind is still too much on Ben to be able to continue this date any longer.

"I'm so sorry, I told my mum and dad I'd go out for dinner with them tonight." I fib. "Next time though?"

He wraps his arms around me and kisses me on the top of my head. "Of course!"

I lean into him a little and as we make our way back to the station, the guilt rises again. On our journey home, I'm more contemplative than usual and it doesn't go unnoticed.

"Hey, is everything ok?" He asks as we stand side by side in the crammed carriage.

"Yeah, fine. I'm feeling a little tired to be honest... Didn't sleep great last night."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that." He kisses me on the top of my head again, which only makes things worse.

When we arrive back in our hometown, we share a long hug goodbye. Matt kisses me softly me on the lips and makes me promise to text him later. After watching him walk away, I make my way out the exit and swiftly turn left to get a cab.

***

10 minutes later, I arrive at the front door and before I have the chance to think clearly, I knock. Ben swings it open, his face shocked to see me. As he opens the door wider, I let myself in. Silently, he leads me up to his room and we sit on his bed together.

"This is very unexpected." He says, his deep voice bolting through me.

"I thought you might like the surprise?" I say nervously and sweep my hair round one shoulder. He smiles and my heart starts to race.

"Don't take this the wrong way, Holly, but why are you here?"

I focus on the floor, unable to meet his gaze, and shake my head. "To be honest, I have no idea."

"I was just trying to find a movie to watch if you want to join me?"

"Sure." I say, my heart racing.

"Have you eaten? We can order some food, or I can make something?"