[Complete] Noise and Kisses {chicklit}

32

I wake a little while later to Ben's light snoring. I roll over to check the time, pressing the button on Ben's screen. When it lights up, I see three notifications from Becca. My mind immediately thinks of the worst, and I correct myself, remembering how much I hated that he'd never given me the chance to prove myself when we were in Avebury.

I'm not going to read his texts... just because they're from Becca, it doesn't mean I have anything to worry about. My heart is thumping out of my chest, and I know that I have to read them. I pull down on the notification to read the trail and my chest sinks as I see:

You busy? Fancy some company again? xx

Come on Ben, you know you want to xx

I miss you, call me xx

I cup my hand over my mouth and choke back the tears brimming to the surface. Desperate to get out of there, I quickly dress and order an Uber. Silently, I open the door and make my way onto the street and into the waiting cab.

I know I shouldn't have read the texts and I hate myself for doing it, but fundamentally, I did it because deep down, I don't trust him... and it turns out, I was right not to.

When I get home, it's a little after 3am, and I quickly change into my bed clothes and jump into bed, but my mind refuses to stop thinking about them. As I toss and turn, my phone springs into life.

R u ok? Just let me know u got home x

A few minutes later, another message appears.

Holly? Are you ok? X

A few seconds later, the phone starts ringing, and I immediately cancel the call. Angrily, I reply:

I'm home. I clicked on your phone to check the time and saw the messages from Becca.

He immediately responds.

Answer the phone. I can explain x

It's not what you think x

Please Holly, you need to trust me x

My stomach sinks. I can't trust him... all that's gotten me before is a load of drama and heartbreak.

I can't. I've been burnt too many times.

But I love u so much xx

My heart breaks as I tap out a final message and click send.

I love you too, but it's not enough xx

I switch my phone off and force myself to sleep.