Red String of Fate

Eight

"Y/n stay behind." I hear Mama say, I feel my blood run cold. Both Enid and Stephanie give me a sympathetic look. Everyone leaves except for Marilyn and I just want to curl into a ball and hide. "What were you thinking you could have gotten seriously hurt. You're lucky it was just a bloody lip and nose. Those girls could have ganged up on you." with each word she said I shrunk more and more. I start rubbing my pointer finger and my thumb together trying to calm down but I start to feel overwhelmed. This was the first time I've gotten yelled at by her. I don't let her see that I am starting to panic.

"What do you have to say for yourself." Marilyn says to me, I want to say something that the words are stuck in my throat. Nothing is coming out and I try to breathe for air but there's nothing, there's no air going in and there's none coming out. It feels like I'm suffocating "Are you okay darling?" she bends down and she touches my shoulder and I flinch away.

"Sunshine look at me." Mama says in a low voice its muffled like im under water. I want to look up but I can't, I can't move. I just concentrate on looking at my feet. "Sunshine please" She says again "Can you talk?" I shake my head. "Do you want to sit on the couch?" I nod my head, I see a hand sticking out and I know its Mama. She's patient and she waits for me to put mine with hers. I slowly move mine into hers and she guides me to the couch she sits down next to me. I start to tap on her hand with my finger "Do you want to be left alone?" I shake my head no.

"Do you want only one person with you?" I nod my head. "Who?" I keep taping not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings. "Me?" I slowly shake my head no. I heard muffled sounds and it was quiet. "Can I touch you sunshine?" I nod my head yes. She bends down and she takes my shoes off and she sits down. "Lay down with me okay" I nod my head again and I move my body and I listen to her heartbeat trying to get mine to match with hers and soon enough I do and the sounds are coming back. "Are you okay to talk now?" I shrug my shoulders.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you. I was just worried about you, you could have really gotten hurt and I don't want to see you get hurt."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you angry" I croaked out.

"Oh sunshine. I'm not mad at all, just worried. And now I'm also proud of you, you stood up for a friend and fought back amazingly." I have a small smile on my face.

"Are you feeling better?"

"A little bit."

"What else is bothering you?"

"What Marilyn said."

"What did she say?"

"That she was disappointed in me and that's when my heart started racing."

"She's not disappointed in you, she was probably almost as worried as I was."

"I guess so."

"Why don't we take the rest of the day off, you only have a class left. I'll just email your teacher to say that your done for the day." I nod my head, she quickly gets up and she walks over to the laptop and quickly writes on it then closes it. "Why don't we get some hot coco at the weathervane? It looks like we could both use it." I nod my head and I get my shoes and we make our way out of the building and into the car. I stay quiet as she drives into town, she parks the car and we walk inside. "Go sit down, I'll order for us." I just nod my head, I walk over to a table and I sit down, I take my phone out of my pocket and I see that I have a couple messages from Marilyn.

Marilyn: Are you okay?

Marilyn: I'm always here for you if you need to talk

Marilyn: I'll stop by Larissa's office after class is over.

I don't even know what to write back, I could choose to ignore it. But if she doesn't see me there when she gets out she will get worried. But Larissa is also gone. As I debate internally whether or not I should text her, Larissa comes over, She sets the cups on the table and then walks back to the counter.

"I got you food sunshine. You need to eat after a panic attack, you know it takes a lot out of you. Even if you eat a little bit." She sits down in front of me and she smiles.

"Marilyn texted me and I'm not sure I should text back. I don't even know what to say if I do."

"Well what did she say?"

"She asked me if I was okay and that she's here if I need to talk and that she will be back at the office after class is over."

"Well you need to text her that you're not there. She wont get worried she knows you're with me." I unlock my phone and I start to text Marilyn.

Me: I'm at the Weathervane with Larissa. Thank you

I put my phone down and I look at Larissa and I give a small smile.

"One hell of a first day, don't ya think?"

"Yeah and in all honesty I never thought I would see you get into a fight. Especially on the first day."

"Well I did pretty well for my first fight didn't I" she gives me that look of you have got to be kidding me, she raises her eyebrow. "I mean I'm not gonna go around starting fights but at least we know that I can defend myself."

"You are right about that. And for a first fight you're not that bloody either." I laugh

"I mean I can always change it."

"Don't even think about it." I raise my hands up in surrender.

"I will try not to get into any more fights" she rolls her eyes and shakes her head. We sit and we talk more about our summers while I eat and she picks at my food. I watch as she looks past me but I pay no mind and I go back to looking at my food. She nudges my foot and I look up and she nods her head.

"Look at who's here" I turn my head and I see Marilyn walking in the room. She spots us and walks over to us.

"Can we talk?"