Saving Agent Hotchner | 1

5. Restricted feelings

HOTCH
I had a particular dream, one that concerned and confused me. I left work the previous night, ready for a good nights rest. When I got ready for bed and finally laid my head against my pillow, I let my thoughts roam free. Unfortunately, instead of dreaming about anything random, my thoughts drifted to Y/N. I let myself dream about her.

Unlocking the front door to my house, I walked inside and headed down the hallway. I was ready for a nice cosy night with my wife and son. Putting my bag down, I smiled at the sight of Y/N sitting with Jack on the couch, one of his toys in her hand as Jack started laughing. I looked down at her ring finger, my heart beating with love as I gazed upon the gold wedding band and diamond ring on her finger.

"Daddy's home!" Y/N smiled, watching as Jack got up from the couch and jumped onto me, wrapping his arms around my neck.

To say that I jolted up from the bed would be an understatement. I immediately stood up and stripped, intending to spend 10 minutes under the cold water that my shower could provide. My dream had enticed feelings that I didn't know I had, resulting in an uncomfortable strain in my pants.

I thought that once I had successfully gotten that...inappropriate dream out of my head, that my feelings would slowly disappear as well. Unfortunately, I was wrong. My thoughts about Y/N weren't necessarily bad, but they were thoughts I shouldn't have been experiencing about one of my Agents. I was her boss, and she was my employee.

———

Nevertheless, I arrived to work as normal - early as usual. No one was around, so I had 30 minutes to myself. I intended to spend those 30 minutes catching up on paperwork before the next case would inevitably fall onto my desk as soon as Strauss arrived at work.

Instead, I looked up from my stack of paperwork to see Y/N opening the doors to the bullpen, her bag hanging from her shoulder as she sipped the coffee she must've made at home. She put her bag at her desk and picked up her paperwork from her drawer, beginning her day. For some reason, I was more interested in watching her be a good Agent by completing her paperwork, rather than doing my own paperwork.

I needed to focus on my own work, so I reluctantly moved my gaze and refused to look up from my work until it was done. 15 minutes later, JJ walked into my office, a case file in her hands.

"Time for another case." She handed me the case file, exhaling. I nodded, watching as she walked out of my office. I put away my paperwork and stood up, reading the case file as I walked to the conference room. Admittedly I was less focused on the case, and more focused on Y/N.

I did listen to Penelope as she went on about the case we would be investigating - something about 3 10-year-old boys going missing on their way home from school. The case made me feel uneasy. Every case involving children - no matter how old they were - made me think of Jack, and how much I missed him.

"4 days ago, 3 10-year-old boys went missing while on their way home from school in Bakersfield, California." Penelope exhaled.

For some reason, watching Y/N react to this case was interesting. She seemed just as confused and disgusted as the reast of the team. When hearing about the circumstances as to the boys disappearance, her face contorted - like she had just smelled something bad.

I couldn't keep my eyes off Y/N. I didn't want to tip any of the team off, so I focused on the case file in front of me and listened as she gave her own theories as to what happened.

"Is it a possibility that the boys went riding? Maybe they found a hideout that they liked and went there?" Rossi questioned.

"Yeah, that's what police thought, until another 10-year-old boy went missing 24 hours ago." Penelope shook her head.

"As of now, we have 4 missing 10-year-old boys. No witnesses, no notable M.O." Emily shrugged her shoulders.

"Maybe the boys were lured away. There are a few things that would catch the attention of a 10-year-old." Y/N suggested, reading through the file in her hands.

"That is a possibility. Maybe they were lured with candy, or video games." Derek nodded.

"So, this could be a case of stranger danger? The kids ignored their parents warnings about talking to and taking things from strangers." JJ exhaled.

"Seems so at the moment. Bakersfield police needs us ASAP. Wheels up in 20." I instructed, everyone standing up. I stopped when I noticed that Y/N hadn't yet gotten up from her chair.

"Y/N, are you alright?" I asked, concerned.

"Oh, yeah. I'm alright. Just...worried about the boys...that's all." She nodded.

"We all are. If at any point this case becomes too difficult, let me know." I smiled.

"I should be saying that to you, not the other way around." She chuckled slightly before getting out of her chair and heading out of the conference room.