Karl Jacobs
--
I stand at the entrance of our school waiting for Lola. We meet here every day before class starts, but today she isn't here. There's two minutes until class and I haven't even heard from her, she hasn't even read my messages. I kick a pebble around with my foot waiting for something to happen. I look around the car park to see if she's maybe already here but she isn't, and neither is Sapnap. The bell rings and I quickly send her one last message telling her i'm going inside.
As I turn to walk into class I feel someone tug on my jacket. I turn to see Lola standing behind me, and she now has bangs. I also notice her arm is bandaged and she has a black eye. I begin to ask what happened but someone stops to talk to Lola before I had to chance to say anything.
"What happened?" I ask as the person walks away. "Are you okay?" I place my hands on either side of her but she's quick to shrug them off.
"No, i'm obviously not okay" her voice comes out raspy. "Where did you go on Saturday? I needed you".
"Oh, i'm so sorry I had to go hom-"
"Home? You went home?" she shakes her head. "I had a vase thrown at me" she waves around her bandaged arm, "Aarons girlfriend punched me" she points to her eye, "and someone pulled my hair so hard it ripped out! So I had to go get these ugly bangs done just to cover my now bald spot" I flinch as her voice gets louder and louder. "And you were at home?"
"Lola, i'm so sorry" I pause. "Something came up, I needed to get home-"
"And I needed you, Karl!" she stomps. "I'm always there whenever you need me, why couldn't you be there for me?" she's quick to wipe away the few tears that escaped. "You know, I really would drop you right now and never talk to you again, but i'm a good person" she huffs.
"Lola-"
"No, I don't want to hear anything you have to say. I'll continue being your fake girlfriend, but that's it. We are not friends, not after this" she walks away before I have the chance to say anything. I stand out the front of school, staring into the full carpark but I feel so empty.
I ignore the tightness in my chest, and swallow back tears before making my way inside. I walk through the corridors until i'm in my class. I walk in expecting Mr. Mavric, but i'm instead met with a sub. I walk to a seat trying to make up a lie on why i'd need to go home early today, but i'm instead distracted by the conversation happening in front of me.
"Yea she tore into her" one of them laughed. "I heard B ripped Lolas hair" .
"She did! Then Em threw that vase" they laugh. "All because of that Karl kid, aye" I suddenly feel myself cave in. They obviously don't know i'm behind them and i'm not going to tell them that i'm here.
"Who even is he?"
"No idea. Nick is really close with him so I guess that's how Lola met him" he shrugs. "But Aaron hates him, said he stole his girl or whatever".
They begin talking about something else and I stay quiet. Lola is hurt because of me. If I just went to her before rushing home she would've been okay right now. We would be okay right now. I'd still have at least one friend.
--
Lola's hand loosely holds mine as we enter the lunch room. Our usual group are sitting at a table by the window and we make our way over to them. I look down at Lola to see her smiling, but she looks so different. Something i've learnt about Lola is that she may always be stressed, but she's always happy. There really isn't much that upsets her, so seeing her fake smiling right now knowing that it's all my fault, it's crushing me.
We sit down together and she's quick to drop my hand so she can start eating. No one had any reactions to her injuries or new hair, which proves to me that they were all there and saw what happened when I wasn't. No one asked questions about what happened, none of them even asked how she is doing. It's like she told them all to not say anything, to continue living their life like nothing happened to her.
I look around the room to try and spot Sapnap but he's nowhere to be found. Harmony also isn't anywhere to be seen. I feel my leg begin to bounce and my hands go clammy. All I want to do is run home and call him.
"They're in New York?" My head snaps to Lola as she talks. "When did they leave?"
"Harmony said they left late last night" Tracy shrugs, "They were meant to leave this afternoon but her dad wanted them there earlier".
"Them?" I question, hoping Lola would answer. She just sits there in silence, acting like i'm not there and I didn't just speak.
"Yea, Harmony and Nick" Tracy smiles. "You didn't know?"
"Oh- Um, yea I knew" I lie, "I thought maybe someone else was there at the same time or something".
They continue their conversation as I stare down at the table, not knowing how to feel. He left my house and got on a plane to New York without even telling me. He hasn't even messaged me, I just thought he was at home this whole time. Not in another city with Harmony and her family. Everything around me suddenly moves slowly, the sound is muffled and my eyes go blurry. I quickly stand up, I try to tell Lola that i'll be back but i'm not sure if the words actually came out.
I walk from the table, trying my best to not stumble into people or objects. I don't know where i'm going to, I just know that I need to leave. I can't stay at school today. There's too much happening in my brain at once, too many thoughts, too many emotions. My hand clutches at my chest as I keep walking. I feel my breathing go shallow, tears are flowing out of my eyes and all I hear is an odd ringing noise. I feel myself push open a door and i'm suddenly outside, staring at the same full carpark I was looking into this morning.
----
ello besties
how is everyone?
how are you all liking sweater weather??
omg i got to hear this song live a few weeks ago which was SO COOL !! all i could think about was my lola
anyway i love u all very very much
have the best days/nights!
see you soon :)
YOU ARE READING
Sweater Weather - Karlnap (au)
Fanfiction"Karl" he says softly, making me turn to face him. "Do you ever feel different?" he asks, without looking at me. "Different in what way?" he turns to me, looking me in the eyes.
