Karl Jacobs
--
I've been back at school for three weeks now. August is almost over and i've spent it acting like i'm okay. Lola has been distant with me again for an unknown reason, but she's at my house every Friday night for dinners my mum hosts. Sapnap and Harmony are still the couple of our school. And i'm back to being a no one.
The people have noticed that Sapnap and I aren't really talking anymore. All the attention I once had is now gone, I really feel like my old self again. Except I know i'm not the old me, without Sapnap I can never be me. For a while I thought all the attention on me was from Lola, but I know now it was just Sapnap. I don't know when he became popular, if I looked a timeline I wouldn't even be able to point the moment out. It's just happened and it's way out of my control. All I want is for him to be happy and have everything he wants, I just don't know if this is it.
"Karl" Lolas fingers snap in my face. "Stop staring at them" I look to my right to see Lola rolling her eyes at me. "I'm right here, why can't you at least act like you're interested in what i'm saying?"
"Sorry" I cough. "What's up?"
"There's a part-"
"No, I told you I won't be going to anymore parties" I shut her down before she had the chance to suggest me going to the party.
"It's not a house party" she frowns. "It's actually not even a party" she pauses. "I spoke to your mum about it and she said it would be a good idea for you to join me".
"What?" now I frown.
"It's a wedding" her cheeks go pink and she avoids eye contact with me. "You don't have to come with me".
"No, of course i'll come with you" I smile softly. It's nice to be considered again. "When is it?"
"Next weekend" she shrugs. "My family weren't meant to go because my dad had a fight with my uncle, but now everyone is angry at my uncle so we're invited again".
"Oh, nice" I just nod my head.
"Your mum said she still has your suit from the last wedding you attended" we start walking to our classes as the bell rings. "She also said if it doesn't fit you she'll take you shopping".
"When did you do all this talking with my mum?" I chuckle.
"I called her yesterday while you were with Marianne".
Lola and I go our separate ways as we both go to class. I walk into the room to see Sapnap sitting with his new group of friends. I then do my best to ignore his presence until i'm sitting in my own seat at the back of the classroom. I watch how they all act with each other. His friendship with them is something very different, they're all just stereotypical guys. I never knew what kind of friendship we had but I was always confident that we were both comfortable with the friendship we did have. I would do anything to live through it all again, even if it has the same outcome.
--
"Mum!" I shout as I walk inside. "Mum?"
There's no response. All I hear is the familiar sound of heavy boots walking down the stairs. I swallow any anxiety I have as dad approaches me, he's holding a cardboard box stacked with his clothes. We don't say anything to each other, he just lets out a heavy grunt as he passes me to leave the house. I don't look back and watch him leave, I just stay looking forward. I haven't seen him since everything that happened. I haven't even talked to him on the phone. And I honestly don't care. If he was around right now, everything would be so much worse.
"Karl" mum approaches me, wiping away tears i'm assuming dad caused. "Did you speak to Lola today?"
"Yea" I quickly answer. "Is everything ok-"
"No questions" she's blunt before she quickly puts on a smile. "Lets go see if that suit still fits you".
I follow her upstairs. The suit is laying out on her bed and I can tell just by looking at it that it won't fit me. The last time I went to a wedding I had only just turned twelve, I don't know why mum thought it would still fit. She still insisted I at least attempt to get it on, so I try. The pants don't go past my knees and the jacket is stuck at my elbows.
"I don't think I can wear this one" I look up at her and I can see she's holding in a laugh. "We might need to go shopping".
"Yea, maybe we do" she lets out a small laugh. "We'll go on Saturday?"
"I can't. Lola and I are going painting on Saturday. Can we go tomorrow afternoon?" mum just nods her head.
"You know, i'm so happy you're with Lola" I look at mum and see she's frowning. "But I never thought you'd let anyone come between you and Nick".
"What do you mean?" I question.
"It's just-" she pauses. "Nick used to be here all the time, when he wasn't here physically you were on your games with him. Since you've been with Lola I haven't seen him at all, I haven't even heard you speak about him".
"Oh, yea" I look away from her before she can see any sadness on my face.
"Did something happen?" I shake my head. "Karl, please".
"No, mum. Nothing happened" I swallow. "He's in a serious relationship with Harmony, and now i'm with Lola. We just don't find time for each other anymore".
"Oh" her face falls.
I feel a part of me shrivel. I never thought my mum cared enough about Nick and I to visibly be upset about us not really talking anymore. I begin walking out of her room but I hear her clear her throat, I look back to see her staring at me. Her hand is resting on her chest and I can tell she wants to say something.
"What?" I ask and she shakes her head. "Please just say whatever you want to say".
"Well, I just-" she pauses and shakes her head again. "I always thought you and Nick were going to get together. I honestly thought you already were together and you both just kept it from me".
"No" I say breathlessly. "I don't think that could ever happen".
---
HELLO EVERYONE
I HAVE MISSED YOU ALL!!!!!!
im finally back... i know it was like the shortest break ever but still im excited to be backkkkkkkkkkkkk <33
im also using this time now to share some exciting news with you........
its all very early BUT i've decided that when Sweater Weather ends i will be posting a new fanfic........ and it won't be karlnap
it will be dnf !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
there is no title for it yet, i know the plot but that is literally it lololololol
i'll keep you all updated with how its going!!!!!
i hope you all enjoyed this chapter! i would love to hear all your thoughts and i would like to know how everyone is doing???!!! any updates from you guys????
ily all sm
YOU ARE READING
Sweater Weather - Karlnap (au)
Fanfiction"Karl" he says softly, making me turn to face him. "Do you ever feel different?" he asks, without looking at me. "Different in what way?" he turns to me, looking me in the eyes.
