𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐊𝐄𝐃

28: 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱'𝘃𝗲 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗻

𝗣𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗹𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗮𝗵

The Shining played on the projector screen of the private jet. Twelve hours into our eighteen-hour flight and a grinder sub inspired sandwich for lunch, I was growing sleepy for the second time and my interest in movies was dying. Two Tyler Perry plays, a random documentary about a young rich daughter who turned into a serial killer, and now a horror film.

That's how fast my moods were switching.

When one film didn't hold my attention anymore, I dug through the list for something else. My phone was on airplane mode, regardless of the Wi-Fi accessibility on the plane. But I had my Mac connected, resting on the pull-out table closest to me.

Still, it didn't do the trick.

Everything brings me back to the man so close, yet so far.

"What'chu watching?" Came from the six-foot-five frame. His locs were left loose today. The latest style showcases the head full of congos, versus the cross-cross technique he normally does.

You're paying too much attention.

"A movie." I answered back, never taking my eyes off the screen.

By now, I believe, my attitude was rebounding off of him. The slick remarks no longer earned me a verbal response, teeth smack, or even a subtle head shake. Instead, KD only stared down at me. His eyes boring into mine before I couldn't take the moment and broke away.

Even then, he didn't give in to my responses. Only reading my body language before kissing my forehead. Or neck. Or cheek. The last time it was all three.

This time was no different. Expect when he bent down to meet me on the couch. His loose locs fell over as he brushed passed my neck and cheek. The unexpected touch awakens the desire to pull him closer.

Zay stood up straight, tossing back the dreads before taking the seat directly across from me in the cabin.  There was nothing else said by him in that moment.

Unlike myself, Ka'Dafii kept his electronics bagged up in his Nike tote which was labeled in the baggage claims of the jet. He was barely focused on the television — even when the docuseries was playing. That was the most I caught him paying the most attention, which was barely in itself.

Ten, fifteen, maybe even thirty minutes had passed before the thoughts in my head couldn't stand to be left alone anymore.

"Would you really be okay if we never saw each other again? Like, that doesn't bother you? Not an ounce? Not at all?"

KD turned his attention from the window of the plane to me. Blinking a few times before sighing softly. I know the questions were out of the ordinary. Leave it to me to overthink during the entire eighteen-hour flight. Even in this jumpy state with The Shining playing, I stared blankly at the film. Lost in the thoughts of 'what ifs'.

"Why would I never see you again, mama?"

"Cause you've given up so easily." I told him, tugging my bottom lil in between my teeth. The facial expressions crossing on his face were worth seeing.

"Easy...? It's not easy to express emotions. 'Specially when they're ignored and you gotta sit in the shit and figure out if you're wrong for feeling how you feel."

Mm.

Stubbornly, I wanted to ignore the valid points being made by him. Yes, I understood that he too had something to lose in this situation, but in my mind, it wasn't that deep. Trust and love. That's all we needed, and we had enough to secure a long distance relationship.