Elysian Fields

13 - Querencia

POV - Nora

It was time to tell him.

I felt some sort of comfort having her beside me as if the energy she owned was my motivation, he stood clueless as his eyes drew to my shivering hands.

Even though my body was conscious, my mind felt disconnected from the situation, maybe it wasn't the right time. Was it too soon?

Even though I've known her for a few years only recently, I have been able to confirm what these feelings were. Who'd new that the girl of my dreams would've been the one with me day in and out.

"Mom, we've been standing here for 5 minutes, what's up?" My head spun in doubt that I could do this.

My confidence was missing, what if he thought I was some wh*re.

Would he accept two moms? Would he ever love me the same just because I like women? I feel like I've found my queen but how could I tell my 18 year old this.

For all he knows, Mason hates me because of my job, how will he react to the news that I'm with one of the nurses there?!

I pulled the string of my mannequin mind back to the situation and beside me saw the gentle expression Anna always held upon her glowing frame, she signalled that we were ready.

I should just tell my own son the truth.

"I- Kingston. I know how stressed you must be with the divorce and everything coming up, and I don't think this is the time to-"

"Hey, hey. It's fine mom. You can tell me. I felt like you and dad are better off alone. I don't know what he was about to do that night but whatever it was, it has to stop. This divorce is the best choice for the both of you."

I nodded. Was this really my child? I was astonished at how fast my boy grew up and how mature he was being about the whole situation.

It was the right time, and I was ready.

"Kingston, ever since the divorce was filed for, I felt stressed and anxious. Your father and I are no longer together even though the process is still running at court. When I felt stressed, I turned to my friend. Colleague, actually. She gave me a shoulder to cry on and everything felt right. And we just, talked more often and we both agreed that we both..."

Kingston frowned, but realisation straightened the creases on his forehead.

"We both like each other. Quite a lot. More than friends. We want to start a relationship together only if you and Lola are okay with that, of course but I mean I know I didn't raise homophobic children and told you all to be accepting of everyone and to be honest, I would be quite ironic if the children were homophobic and their mother was gay so-"

My breathe hitched as Kingston, at lightning speed, raced into me and squeezed me tightly. This was not the reaction I had anticipated for, but I would gladly take it any day. This situation was opposing to the multiple scenarios that rolled around in my head.

"Mom... I'm so happy for you! I'm so glad you told me; I have never been prouder to say you were my mother."

My eyes swelled with tears, and we embraced on another, right outside Elysian's room. I was delighted I had finally told someone.

The secret relationship between Anna and I was becoming hard to conceal. I let my mind wonder off to memory lane, to the time I first knew about these feelings I had obtained for Anna.

Anna Collins.

Just the thought of her, made my heart swoon.

I reminisced about the way I had fallen for Anna, her charming smile, her soft blonde hair, shiny brown eyes that was enveloped with light.

"So, Mom. Tell me about her." Kingston said, surprising me as he spoke. "What? I'd like to know about who my mother's dating. Wait does she know about everything going on with dad?."

I silently nodded.

"Okay. Now tell me when did you know about your feelings?"

My eyes glittered as I recalled our first encounter.

"Ellie went missing once. She told me she just went for a walk and something but I saw right through her lies. She was clearly with someone else, but anyways I was really stressed. Elysian was my daughter and I had always vowed to protect her. And knowing that she was in the real world possibly contracting a disease or risking her life. I freaked. Had a panic attack in the bathroom, and that's when Anna found me. "

I had been sweating and my eyes began to "sweat" too.

I would never admit I cried.

"Anna had walked in and raised me up and comforted me. I usually had a strong mindset but I... Anna thankfully helped me and when Ellie got back, I was mad. Me and Ellie had our first fallout ever. Anna was there for me, by my side. She's the querencia my heart lives in."

We were sitting in my office. Anna was talking to me about something along the lines of apologising to Ellie and fixing our bond.

I sat, sobbing in her arms, all until I looked up right into her dashing brown orbs, and she looked down at me with nothing more than a friendly smile.

It felt wrong but I did it anyway.

I raised my head, which was currently in her lap, towards her head. My lips were slightly spilt as her eyes danced from each of mine. Her eyes fell to my lips as my eyes slowly shut.

And it happened. It was everything I had wanted. It was just like this unreleased joy erupted from my heart and pumped it around my body with my blood.

But I was married. I was happily married to Mason. Or so I thought.

I was NOT going to describe how kissing Anna felt to my son.

The thought itself made me shudder.

"I guess our relationship just hit it off. During breaks we'll go on mini dates together and it was perfect. It was everything I had imagined for but with your father."

I sighed, not admitting that I was extremely grateful this suffocating relationship me and Mason had to endure for over 5 years was coming to an end, but I was still downhearted that my son and daughter no longer had married parents.

Kingston will understand, but Lola...?

How will my daughter react that her mother and father will split up?

"Mom?"

What will she think when she doesn't come home to her parents' faking smiles in the living room, and hiding their problems for their children?

"Mom? Hello?"

What will she think when I tell her I'm bisexual? How will she react when she finds out her mother is dating another woman? What will she say when-

"MOM?"

I jumped at the sudden raise in volume.

"You will not yell at me young man. As your mother, I deserve respect."

"Sorry" Kingston sheepishly replied. "But I know what you're thinking about. Lola, right? Don't worry about her. I know my sister well."

I smiled at the comforting words sprouting from my son's mouth.

"Thank you, Kingston."

"Well, I'll get going then, it's almost 1am"

Kingston walked past, and down the stairs after hugging me for one last time.

I felt as if a weight was taken of my back.

Suddenly, I heard whispers in Elysian's room.

"But I want to know what you were like when you were a baby.." Elysian's muffled whine came through. I raised an eyebrow before opening her door. She was either talking to herself or someone else in her room.

As soon as I stepped in, Elysian seemed fast asleep, but her breath came out harsh and sharp. I could tell she wasn't asleep.

I smiled to myself, shaking my head, amused, before closing the door and walking away. Everything was perfect.

So far.