Black & White

Chapter twelve

Whilst I am struggling trying to open my eyes, I can hear people with indistinct voices singing in front of me. A familiar song, with familiar voices the more I wake up and the same song that I've always been sung to, ever since I was a little boy with white hair. "S from rozhdeniya, solnyshko" "Happy birthday, sunshine", tells my mom, whom I just recognized right in front of me, who is sitting on my bed, with my sister's company.

I am totally surprised to see my little sister having the motivation to sing our traditional "happy birthday" song at seven in the morning.Notwithstanding, my eyes do not see any bulky man with glasses, already all dressed up for work. No, this man is probably somewhere else right now. This dad of mine.

My mom is holding my hands and is praying for our Lord,with my sister looking at her. Her prayer is about a minute or two and I am closing my eyes, with her. "'Blagoslovi moyego syna i, pozhaluysta, istseli yego ot vsego, chto prichinyayet yemu vred. Amin." "Bless my son and please heal him of everything that harms him. Amen.", my mom finishes praying. I like to imagine God being next to me, sitting calmly and watching over me, smiling.

"Kakovo eto, kogda tebe pyatnadtsat', dorogoy?""How does it feels to be fifteen, honey?", my mom is asking me, patting my leg."Eto kazhetsya obychnym""It feels ordinary."

It really does. I don't know and I think I'll never know what is so special in being fifteen. I don't feel excited about anything today, and I don't even feel like inviting any friends over.

My sister hands me a nice and cute wish card, with this time, beautiful words in. I can see that there are many people that wrote words for me in it, even my soccer coach. My mom wrote for all my family, cousins, aunts and grandparents from mom's side. I know those words are from them because I can recognize them in the words they are all using. They are very special to me. After opening and getting a quick glance at the two sides of the card, I open my arms to hug my little sister and mom, thanking them.

Although I am reading each text, I get to read the one from my parents and I am noticing something; the text doesn't sound like my dad at all. Not for a second. There is no "young man" or "son", or any kind of thing he would be the type to tell me the day of my birthday. Only sweet words from my mom, and she even signed for him, instead of him signing for himself.

It's not a surprise for me, in the end. Dad is dad. Dad becomes absent when he is mad and dad is not able to forgive anyone for anything. Dad runs away from his problems instead of solving them and dad has been ignoring me for six days now, and he doesn't care.

However, my mom and sister are the two most precious girls in my life. I could do anything to protect them and never be more grateful for everything my mom is doing for us. They are my world. Family is something to put first, and I find it very unfortunate that a lot of people my age don't get to realize this. "Mama, eto ya ili ty raspisalas' za papu...?""Mom, is it me or you signed for dad...?", I ask her, trying to not break the ambiance.

She is trying to reply to me, but I believe that she would rather my sister not be there if she tells me. "Anastasiya, ne mogli by vy nakryt' na stol, pozhaluysta?""Anastasia, could you set the table, please?", she asks her seriously, still laying her hand on my leg.

My sister is sighing and stands up, ready to leave."YA ne proshu mnogogo, Anastasyia. Sdelay eto dlya menya pozhaluysta."I'm not asking for much, Anastasia. Do it for me please."

After that she is actually leaving, my mom is moving from my bed and closes the door, to get on my bed again. "Da ob etom, Aleksey..." "Yeah about that, Alexei..."

I know what is coming already.

"On ne khotel podpisyvat', verno?"
"He didn't want to sign, right?"