Black & White

Chapter fifteen

Today is the day I've been waiting for. Wednesday March 30th. But first, updates; rumors about me are spreading and let me tell you that students of my grade still find it funny to bother me. Second, my French teacher made a hate speech to me two minutes long in front of the whole class, and third, my mom's birthday was three days ago.

It was weird, because my mom and Andrei are as if they are not together anymore. He sleeps in the guest room and Mom, their room. Mom decided so because she's the real boss of the house. She hung out with her friends for her 40th birthday and spent time with my sister and I, the same afternoon. I bought her her favorite flowers, and I could tell she was having a really good time even if her husband, or ex husband, didn't get to be with her. She refused his presence, no matter how much he tried to win her heart again.

Also my relationship with Vicky is good, I asked her to be my girlfriend and she accepted, enthusiastically. My best friend can't stop being excited for us and constantly wants me to present her to him. I will one day, I promised him. My mom can't wait to meet her as well. She is very happy for our relationship and she feels reassured that Vicky is Christian.

I'm in the car with my mom, heading to the doctor. I am very, very anxious. She holds my hand and looks at me, telling me that it'll be a relief to know what I'm suffering from. The cuts I had on my legs cured slowly, but I can't tell they are totally invisible. I have been wearing pants every day since the day after my birthday. The pretty obvious reason is that I don't want people to see my legs having more than one cut.

We get out of the car and the cold breeze is making me shiver. The hospital looks sick and ugly, and the inside of it is sad, full of sick people. I sit next to my mom, paying attention to people around me. Some are coughing, some are resting their eyes, some are with their kid or some are just alone. The walls haven't changed colour ever since the last time I went there; they are all pastel green.

There is the same young woman coming into the center of the waiting room, calling my name. I stand up nervously, kissing my cross necklace subtly. I do it every time I feel stressed, and I know God is right next to me. Mom is smiling at me with relief and the woman orders us to follow her and we step into my doctor's office.

It has been a while since I saw her. Maybe two years ago or more... I always found her beautiful. My doctor is in her early thirties, and she's ginger brunette, always wearing a ponytail and looking healthy. Her name is doctor Tessier. I remember having a little crush on her when I was younger. It's strange, I know. I used to get excited to go there just to see her.

"Hello there! How are you guys doing?"

Oh, and she's also very energetic and smiling. It's what I mainly found beautiful in her.

"Good, thank you. How about you?", I tell her. I feel my mom looking at me, knowing I might not actually be good.

"I'm good too, thank you Alexei. He grew a lot didn't he?" Mélanie exclaims to my mom.

She is agreeing with my doctor and they start talking and laughing a little bit. Mom loves people. I remember her saying that she would want me one day to be like her; a family doctor.

"So, Miss Pacaroskova, you told me your son's behaviours and health worried you?"

I am frozen as if I would be stuck to the chair and won't be able to move. She explains everything. Details by details. I know Miss Tessier will be asking me questions. She'll even check on me. I don't want my mom to know everything I'll tell the doctor.

Here we go, Mom talking about my burnings and behaviours. My doctor is not dumb, I obviously didn't burn myself accidentally in a place of nowhere on my inner thigh...