Reaper's Lily

10

(TRIGGER WARNING!! this is your trigger warning for this chapter which contains: attempted suicide! if you are feeling this way yourself please reach out to family and friends! you are loved and are an amazing person! now back to the story)

Liliana's P.O.V:

I ran out the nice modern house, ignoring Kaiden's brother's cry for me to come back, and got in my car. I locked myself in, looking around for my keys in my pockets, then screamed in anger as I realized I did the stupidest horror movie cliché. I dropped my fucking keys! Good thing Dan taught me how to hotwire this car.

I opened the part that let me see the wires and started to hotwire my car. I got it turned on, sitting back up, and yelped in shock as I saw Kaiden staring at me with his eyes shining in the brights of my car. I put my car in reverse, backing out with my foot on the gas like a cement block, then stopped as I put my car in drive. I heard a...wolf?! I slammed my foot on the gas as I looked to see Kaiden only walking towards me like he was Jason fucking Vorhees.

I drove down the road, then stopped as I saw a huge dog in the middle of the road. I stared at the huge dog and saw its dark brown fur almost shining in the brights of my car with the added bonus of being the height of my car. I looked behind me to see if I could back up, but I felt my heart sinking to the ground as I saw Kaiden waiting behind the car on his motorcycle. I wondered if I was really going to run over this animal, but I didn't want to stay a minute more with everything Kaiden was trying to lie to me about. Fuck it.

I slammed my foot on the gas pedal again, not caring if I ran over someone's massive ass dog. I kept on speeding down the road, trying not to worry if I actually hit the dog or not, and heard Kaiden's motorcycle roaring behind me. My poor rabbit only went to 80mph at the max speed I was willing to push it and his death machine was probably faster. I kept my foot on the gas, trying to escape to my house, then looked to see Kaiden wasn't next to me. He wasn't behind me either, so I eased up on the gas.

I made the turn on the road cautiously, still keeping an eye on the rear-view mirror for any sign of Kaiden or that dog. I wasn't paying attention when I saw Kaiden standing near his motorcycle, then slammed on the breaks as I came mere inches from running him over with my car. Kaiden only glared at me, walking to the driver side as I had unbuckled the seatbelt. I crawled to my front passenger seat as I made sure I was locked in, then Kaiden stood at the driver side window.

I opened the glove box, happy that I found the pepper spray I thought that Illena still had, then got it ready. I heard the window shatter, making me scream, and I looked to see Kaiden's fist where my window used to be. I flailed my feet, kicking everything in sight as he tried to grab me, then I felt him trying to drag me to the driver seat when he leaned in further to yank on my shirt. I used the pepper spray, spraying him in the eyes.

He only backed up, wiping the spray from his eyes as I sped off. I drove around his stupid bike, even though I should've run it over, but I didn't. That piece of useless junk probably would've done more damage to my car than I would to it. I had to leave. Kaiden was crazy, and proved to me that I was right. All men were the same and love was still a bear trap.

I drove into town, feeling the shards of glass poking me on the back of my thighs, then stopped at the nearest gas station. I parked in front of a gas pump, turning my car off, and felt silent tears rolling down my cheeks. I didn't understand why I was crying, but here I was. Crying like a big ass baby. I got out my car, slamming it shut, then paid at the gas pump as I felt my tears now becoming a waterfall. The more I wiped away, the more it came down and eventually, I just gave up. I got back in my car, wishing I had a window to block the world out, but I didn't.

I drove mindlessly around town, thinking of Kaiden completely turning into my ex, and I felt so hopeless. I found myself parked near a park and turned my car off. I didn't even bother to get out as I looked out the hole in my driver side door and stared at the ever slowly rising sun as I wondered how my life was so fucked up. I opened the glove box, grabbing a bottle out, and looked at it. My prescribed medication for my PTSD, Prozac. I had only taken these once when I tried to kill myself after being out of the hospital for a little while.

I opened the bottle, putting the lid down in the cup holder, and stared at the inside of the bottle. Just a good handful of these and I'd probably be in the hospital for a day or two. If I had downed this whole bottle, then I'd finally get some peace unless that bastard was waiting for me in Hell. Even then, at least before I'd die of an overdose, there would be some rest. The idea of a dreamless and night terror-less rest did sound amazing.

I stared at the bottle as the sun was started to shine, the bird chirping cheerfully, then looked at the beautiful sun rise. I smiled softly, remembering how I used to love watching it with my great grandmother before I was taken. Had it really been that long since I'd seen it like this? Maybe she'd give me a lashing or two once she saw me. Who knew, but all I knew was that I had finally had enough.

Calvin had won and it wasn't really Kaiden's fault. I wondered if Kaiden would miss me, but I didn't care when the image of him shattering my car window came to mind. I poured a few of the pills into the palm of my hand, sighing, and closed my eyes as I took them. I leaned back into the car seat as I looked at my phone to see my dad texting me. I only scrolled to a picture of my brothers, myself, and my father a few months before I was taken.

My eyes started to grow heavy as I answered Dan's phone call with a drowsy, "Hello?"

"Hey, I'm at your place. Where are you?" Dan asked, and I only took a few more pills like candy.

I only sighed after taking them and said softly as my eyes felt heavier and heavier, "At a park."

"A park? Did you stay up all night again," Dan joked as I heard him getting back into his car.

I rattled the bottle, letting out a dry laugh, and said, "Something like that. Tell Ian he doesn't have to worry anymore."

"Worry?" Dan probably had me on speaker now as I heard his car starting up.

I nodded, humming, "Yeah, and make sure you marry Illena. Have a girl and name her after Abuela."

"Lil, what are you talking about?" Dan asked, and I closed my eyes, waiting for sleep to take over.

"Tell Dad and Mikey that I'm sorry and I love them," I felt a tear rolling down my cheek. I sighed, and said, "Daniel, you're always going to be my favorite. I love you."

"Liliana, where are yo—"

I felt my phone slip out of my hands as I felt my entire body turning limp. Sleep was slowly starting to wash over me, and it was an amazing feeling. I'd never fallen asleep this fast before. Maybe the doctor was right. I needed to take my medication more often.

I only thought of how upset Kaiden probably would've been to hear of me like this, and I felt my heart breaking. The guy that I liked, that literally turned into a monster in front of me, was the only one that I wanted now. If we were in another life, then maybe I could've been happy with him.

I heard my name being screamed, wondering who was screaming at me, but it didn't matter now. I was finally able to get some sleep and I really hoped that Dan didn't nag me all morning.