The Triangle

Part 20

Every roll, every story, every part of us is a thread in the beautiful tapestry of who we are:

I took a run to the park to clear my head, when I got back mom said Frank brought all of my things, I said I guess this is what Dex wants, and it looks like after a week he doesn't want us anymore. Mom said he's just upset he needs time, I went through my things and all of the pics of Dex and I were in the boxes, and his wedding ring he's given up on us regardless of what mom said.

I know he's mad, but how could he give up so soon on our love, I'm not giving up, I took the boxes upstairs and put them in the guestroom, I'll give Dex sometime before I try and see him. Mom and Jenny came into my room,  Jenny asked me if I'm hungry I didn't eat breakfast, I told her I'm not hungry. Mom said I need to eat, and she has some good news, I asked her did Dex call, she said no,but Bell did and she took Faye to her appointment she and the baby are fine.

I said I don't think Dex will let me near the baby when it's born, mom said I don't know that, I told her she's always the optimist in bad situations, she said and I'm a pessimist where is my faith that things will workout. I told her right now it's hard to think that everything will be alright, Dex sent all of my things here so he doesn't want me, mom said maybe not right now but her God can do anything.

Meanwhile she told Jenny to fix me something, and I better eat, they left the room and I went to my room, and into the bathroom I took my clothes off and got in the shower. I cried not only am I losing Dex, but I won't be a part of the baby's life either. After I showered I wrapped up in a towel and went to my room mom brought a tray in and told me to eat, she said Bell told her that Dex is working from home and she's going to see him.

I told her thanks, she said it isn't for me, she wants to be a part of the baby's life, I made my bed I have to lay in it until God changes the situation, she left. I hope Dex let's her see the baby she shouldn't be punished for what I did, she loves Dex as if he were her son.

I looked out the window and saw mom get in her car she drove away, and I felt better and ate something.

(I'm your mother too)

I called Bell just to make sure Dexter is still at home, she said he's in his office working, I told her good I'm on my way there now, don't say anything to him, she said she won't. I hung up, it didn't take me long to get to the house Bell let me in, Dex called for her asking is lunch ready, Bell said she'll bring his tray, now stop all that hollering,I told her I'll take the tray to him.

I knocked on the door, he said come in and sense when does she knock, I walked into the office he looked up at me and said if I'm here to plead Marco's case he doesn't want to hear it. I told him I'm not here for Marco I sat the tray down, and told him to eat and I'll do the talking.

I told him before he and Marco got married I looked at him as a son, and whatever happens with him and Marco I still see him as that, I'm not pleading Marco's case but my own, I want to be a part of the baby's life, because he's my son and I'm the baby's grandmother.

Dexter said I've been good to him, and he wouldn't stop me from seeing the baby, but only if I don't let Marco near the baby, I hated to agree but I did.  He said he knows that Bell keeps me in formed about Faye and the baby, Dex got up and hugged me, he said he hates how this turned out,I told him it doesn't have to be this way. Dexter said I minus well be the first to know he's going to file for divorce, he can't trust Marco so they have no future.

I told him it's only been a week, think about what he's doing, he said remember I'm not here to plead Marco's case, I kissed him and left.

When I got home Marco asked me did I see Dexter, and how did he look, I told him I saw him and he looks fine , but he's hurt, Dexter did say when the baby is born I can see the baby, Marco said maybe Dex will let me bring the baby here and he can see the baby too. I told him I won't do that I agreed to not let him see the baby, Marco said at least Dex isn't punishing me by denying me seeing the baby. He looked at my face, I wanted to cry, I told him I'm going downstairs.

Mom  wait theirs more I can see it on your face, what else did Dex say, mom said Dex is filing for a divorce, I said he didn't waste anytime, but it looks like he moved on some other dude answered his phone when I called him. Mom said stop doing that, I don't know why that happened, again I said she's such an optimist, she said if I want Dex back I need to be one too, mom left the room.

I wonder who that guy was who answered Dex's phone, did he fuck someone on the rebound, I said fuck it and headed to Dex's he's going to talk to me, I sped there as fast as I could when I got there I just walked into the house. Bell told me that Dex is in his office handle my business, I went to his office and just walked in Dex said I'm not welcome here now leave.

I told him he's had his say and I'm going to have mine, I told him I called him and someone answered his phone, so while he's upset with me it didn't take him long to fuck someone else.

Dex said he doesn't know what the hell I'm talking about, but he does know that he's filing for a divorce, he can't trust me, now get out and don't come back. I told him I'm not giving up on us, yes I messed up but I love him, Dex hollered I have a funny way of loving someone by fucking other dudes, and he even let me fuck him to make me happy, I said I never asked him for that, he told me to get out and the next time he sees me will be in divorce court.

I told him even if we get a divorce I will always love him, and like I said I'm not giving up on us and I left the office. I told Bell goodbye and walked out of the door, I got in my car and drove away, I cried the whole ride back to mom's house, all I know is that I want Dex, and I'm going to fight to get him back.

I got home and changed into some swimming trunks, and took a swim, Brandon came out and asked when I was going to finish my book it will help me take my mind off of Dex. I told him it's too late Dex is on my mind, he wants to file for divorce.

Brandon said damn has it gotten to that, I told him for now Dex is hurting I don't think he knows what he's doing, Brandon said from what he sees Dex has his mind made up so I better accept that it's over with us. I told him I'll never accept that, he just needs time, I told Brandon he doesn't have to worry he'll still get paid, he can keep me company but we're not going to talk about Dex. He said cool, he'll go and change he has some trunks in the car, he'll chill with me.

I would run into Dex at the gym, or at a board meeting at Alexanders, Marcelo and I had ten percent of stock in the company. A month later we both went to a charity affair that Ekim sponsored for cancer research, we sat at the same table mom and my brothers were all there, Dex talked to them but not me. Ekim let both of us know having us at the same table wasn't a set up, this affair was set up months ago. I said it's for charity and I'm sure Dex can stomach seeing me for charity,he just looked at me with his cold eyes, he really can't stand being in the same room with me.

After the affair I did try and talk to Dex, he said  he'll talk to me this one time, and that's just to tell me as of now any talking should be done by our attorneys, he suggested that I hire one since he's no long my attorney. I told him just be a man and talk to me,  mom said don't do this here, Dex said I want to talk so he'll talk he said I'm a liar and a cheat and our marriage was a liar, he walked away. People were looking at me I just left too.

Weeks went by, the only good news I heard was about Faye and the baby, but I know Dex won't let me see the child the way he feels about me. A month later I got divorce papers, I told mom Dex hasn't changed his mind so I guess it's really over.

Mom said never say never, she told me time and time again to pray on it, if it's meant to be it will be, don't get her wrong she loves Dex, but if God says something else I need to listen to him, I said now who's being a pessimist. Mom said life goes on and she doesn't want me thinking about hurting myself, I told her I was a kid then and no one will make me feel that way again, if Dex won't fight for our love why should I, maybe it's time I moved on those divorce papers say just how Dex feels.

I went up to my room and listened to Chrisette Michele's (Blame it on me) Dex took me to New York for her concert that's one of the songs I like, and Dex likes (A couple of forever) that was our song for our wedding, tears went down my face, I fucked up and now I have to deal with it.