The Triangle

Part 21

Blame it on me:

I had my door locked so that mom and Jenny wouldn't just walk in, I've been in my room all morning naked and listening to music, and writing notes for the book and it takes my mind off of Dex. Sure enough someone tried to come in and then they knocked, I said I'm busy and I'm not in the mood to talk to anyone, Jenny said when I'm ready to come down and have lunch.

I kept replaying Chrisette Michele song (Blame it on me) The part when she says sometimes you can work it out, sometimes you can't, sometimes you're forced to watch everything fall apart. It's out of your hands, sometimes leaving is easy, I thought it's not so easy for me, and she's right about the part when she says sometimes it hurts to know the love you had is slowly fading away.

I wanted so badly to tell Dex those words blame it on me, say it's my fault say that I left you outside in the cold, with a broken heart, say I'm a liar and a cheat say anything that you want as long as it's over. You thought it was meant to be, I admit so did I.

I ain't going to crying no more, say I'm a liar and a cheat, yes, I love you but I really got to lose you so blame it on me.

I minus well face it Dex hates me and will never trust me again, I lost a good thing in him and it's my fault, it's time I let him go so he can be happy with his new baby.

I put on some shorts and some flip flops, and I unlocked the door and went downstairs, mom and Jenny were in the kitchen, mom said don't come in her kitchen with my underwear on, I told her their shorts. Bell said those are those hoochie daddy shorts that men wear they show too much, I went in the fridge and got the leftover chicken from last night's dinner and sat at the table and ate. Jenny said she made shrimp pasta, I told her this is fine, I'll have the pasta later.

Mom said she can warm it up for me, I told her it's fine, Jenny said at least I finally came out of my room she'll go and clean it up while I'm eating, I told her no I have notes all over the room, I'll clean it up after I'm finished.

Mom asked me why do I keep playing that song over and over again, I know it hurts me, I said because the song makes me think, Jenny said she doesn't see how I can think with the music so loud, she knows the words to the song it's stuck in her head she started singing the words blame it on me. Say I'm a liar say I'm a cheat, she stopped singing and said sorry, I told her don't be it's true I am a liar and a cheat, I'm not going to fight Dex on the divorce he should be happy.

Mom said so should I, okay I made a mistake, I told her and it cost me my marriage, I left the table and went upstairs, I turned the music down and called Dex maybe he just might answer my call he answered I said Dex thanks for answering my call I just wanted to say, I got cut off and it was Rex he said I need to stop calling Dex he won't take my calls.

I told him I just wanted to tell him I won't contest the divorce and I'll sign what he wants me to sign, Rex said he'll tell him and good luck, he hung up. I could hear Chrisette Michele's other song (A couple of forevers) playing in the background. Funny Dex would be listening to that song and me listening to Blame it on me.

Maybe after Rex tells Dex what I said he'll feel better, and maybe some day we can be friends, Dex changed my life and I can truly say I was happy, but I'm just a hoe a liar and a cheat, my phone rang but it stopped it was Dex. I started to call him back, but I'll wait and see if he'll call me again.

(A couple of forevers)

I walked into the family room and watched Dex staring out the window, he's been playing that (A couple of forevers song all morning. He turned around and asked me why I have his phone, I told him because mine is up in my room, so I was going to use his, but he got a call, he said anyone from his firm would've called the house phone so who was it.

I told him it was Marco, he said I shouldn't have answered his call he told me not to have anything to do with Marco, I told him what Marco said so he's going to get his divorce, I asked Dex is he sure this is what he wants. He said it has to be this way, he can't trust Marco and I know why, I told him I'll support him but I think he should've talked to Marco they never talked when he found out what's been going on.

Dex said there's nothing to say it's over, I asked him if he believes that then why does he keep listening to their wedding song over and over again. The music stopped and Dex looked over and Bell turned it off, he told her don't touch that, she said she's been calling for him to have lunch, he said he's not hungry, I told her I am, she said I can eat through anything lunch is on the table.

Dex played that song again, deep down he's still in love with Marco, this is onetime big brother is wrong, I went to eat.

(Divorce)

Three months later we were divorced, Marco didn't ask for anything but to keep my last night I agreed to that, I wanted to say something to Marco, but I couldn't I hope he finds someone he truly can be fateful too, as for me I have a child coming and I'll love him or her. Right now, that's all I need, Mary came over to where I was standing and said I'm still her son and she walked away, and so did I.

I asked mom what she said to Dex, she said she told him he's still her son, let's go we left and went home, mom asked me what I am going to do now that I'm divorce and don't say move on with someone else. I told her that's the last thing on my mind to be with someone else, I need to find me again I will always love Dex.

This is the end of this story, but they'll be more about Marco and Dex coming soon.