Chosen: From the Ashes

A story I want to tell you

"Tell me Obi-Wan, do you have second thoughts on your choice?"

Obi-Wan gulps, he feels suddenly caged as ridiculous as it may sound.

[ or rather ]: Obi-Wan just wants a drink and have a chat, but there is a certain Anakin Skywalker to blow his plans.
Obi-Wan is NOT prepared for a jealous Anakin.
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He will not.

"Buddy, come on, you need to relax. I'll even get you a drink."

"I said I'm not coming. I still have to review the-"

"Obi-Wan, my most uptight friend, and for that I like you so much, come on, give me a few hours of your time. I promise you'll like it."

"I very much doubt that." He huffs in the pleading faux-desperate face of Quilan Vos, that seems to be in one of his "difficult" moods and bull-headed at that. Even with Obi-Wan's great negotiating skills and getaway tactics, he can't break free from this one. Quilan always knew him too well and what buttons to push. "And Anakin shall come back any time now. I'll stay. Thank you."

Quilan Vos straightens his back and makes a huff of his own.

"Please, that boy can take care of himself. It's only for a few hours."

"No, your few hours last time-"

"Two. Only two, I promise. You can come on your own back. No need to wait for me."

"Not that I intended."

"So? Deal? I'll get you the best drink of theirs."

"Where is it anyway?"

Quilan knows he has the deal almost in his pocket and he enthusiastically rambles nonsenses about some awesome cantina with best drinks and "chicks", which for Quilan makes it automatically the best place to hang out on the entire level. Obi-Wan sighs. He knows he will not like it in the least, Quilan's favorite are usually dimly-lit, smelly, too crowded and loud for his taste, with no small amount of barbaric fights erupting and usually Quilan laughing or joining it. Really, he wouldn't even entertain the idea, but a drink is maybe what he needs after all. It got better the last months contrary to the awful first weeks after Ilum trial incident. Stars, it wasn't ones of his best moments, he knows, and only now he can admit that the stress must have caught up with him and messed him up thoroughly. It took dozens meetings with Master Che to even put a name to it, she said it's trauma after the "disturbing" events with Anakin nearly dying, and then slowly coming up with ways to go around it. Time helped and mostly his time with Anakin. It was indeed a splendid idea to make small trips and enjoy it together with the boy, it helped a lot. It still helps.

So maybe a drink would be welcome. He's far more balanced now, no nightmares, has good focus and his unresonable fears and uncertainty do not take over him, he came to know how to handle it. The past method, the only one he believed true for a jedi, of releasing everything to the force and regain his calm and balance was not working. And maybe that was another shock for him, for it always was something he had never problems with, yet after he met Anakin... It's different. He can't just throw everything to the force and be done with it, it's too tangled and molded deep to his core, he would have to throw his heart and mind altogether. It's quiet a challenge and he's not sure he has found his answer, but with time and with Vokara's help, he's taking a different way. To sweep through his feelings, divide it, understand, accept, find out how to go through it, not to suppress it and so on. Of course it takes a lot more time, but it's healthier (Vokara's healer opinion) and most importantly it works for him.