Irreconcilable~Mattheo Riddle

Year 5: Mattheos pov (part 6)

Song: Boys Don't Cry- The Cure

"Listen, Mattheo, I did what I had to." I hear Draco say as I shove past him in the hallway.

It's been a week since he helped Umbridge discover the D.A and she is also headmistress now.

"Mattheo!" He calls back, causing me to be filled with more and more growing irritations towards him.

"What is it Malfoy?" From the corner of my eye I see Theodore and Lorenzo standing beside me, the two of them have also decided to ignore Draco.

"I'm sorry, okay? I had to do it!" He says approaching me and closing the distance, making it easier for me to hit him if he decides to say something stupid.

"You realise me being caught in the D.A has serious consequences," I approach him this time

"I-"

"No, this is the part where you shut up and I talk, " I say rather too loud, and noticing how Lorenzo and Theodore are drawing attention away from the situation.

"Because of you, I can't go back home! Do you get that?" I say, and by doing so, openly admitting that my parents love is something I do want.

More than anything in this world, I wish they were better people, I wish they were the people I needed them to be.

Unfortunately, life is not always fair, and instead of receiving the family you need, you are stuck with a group of strangers.

"It's not like they loved you anyway!"

Before I know it, my hand is stinging with pain, but I think Draco's nose is worse off.

"You bloody broke it" I hear him in between sobs and watching him on the floor.

"I think it's a fair trade, you broke my trust, I break your nose," I shrug.

To my disappointment I am not satisfied, seeing Draco hurt, by my own hand (literally), deeply shames me.

I feel tears start to threaten my eyes and am instantly disgusted by the thought that it turns to nausea.

"Get up," I say through gritted teeth.

A crowd has formed around us, and a few are laughing, enjoying the scene, as if seeing Draco in pain had brought some relief to them.

I offer him my hand, and as I help him up to his feet, he takes a swing at me.

A blow lands on my face, and I feel the blood dripping down my face, down my throat.

I can't say I am in too much pain. After you experience Crucio a few times, this is rather relieving.

Draco seems unnerved by my reaction. To be honest, I am, too.

I am smiling, but I'm not happy, instead I'm filled with anguish and more hurt than before.

"You forget yourself, Draco..."

I say stepping forward, Draco now clutching his nose and hand together, a blue bruise starting to form around it.

As I step closer, he steps backwards, unknowingly, backing himself more into a corner.

"My family may not love me, but yours do," He finally realises he is back against the wall, " that makes them your weakness, and you, theirs." I explain using a rather happy tone of voice, which makes the entire situation more unhinged.

"Do you know what you do when you find a weakness?" I say, this time in a more whisper

"You exploit it." I watch as his eyes grow wider and his breathing quickens.

"What is that supposed to mean?" He spits, and I see hin trying to find his way out the situation.

He tries to run from the wall but I slam him back.

"If I decide to tell the ministry that your father was lying about being under the imperius curse whilst serving my father... well not only will they be thrown in Azkaban, Voldemort will in fact, personally see to their deaths."

"They'll kill you too you know! For snitching!" He cries

"Oh right, well maybe I can suggest that you told all of them this information. Make it look like you betrayed your own family." I shrug.

"I would never do that!"

Once I hear the anguish in his voice. The pleading, the begging, all that agony. Something happens which I can't really explain to myself.

But I feel a single tear stream down my face, and I experience it's movement as if it were my own.

Everything just seems to stop, because as much as I hate Draco, I saw him as my family.

He was there for me in ways I haven't allowed others to see. We lived together, we supported each other, and him giving us up to Umbridge is a betrayal I feel deeply.

Instead of shouting, I find myself struggle to form words, everything that spews from now is just restrained, difficult to get out.

"But you did! You did betray your family!" I say, and I feel ridiculous saying it.

"I didn't!" He says again, wiping more blood from his nose

"I was your family!" I say, my voice shaking, "You were my brother!"

I'm not sure Draco realised anything up until now, but finally I can see the moment the penny drops for him.

He seems to understand why, and then when he seems to want to comfort me, I turn away and leave.

I feel my emotions cascading all over the place and I'm trying to stay composed for as long as possible, but I feel myself reaching a breaking point.

I'm long passed the crowd and don't know where to go.

I find myself walking to the Gryffindor common room.

Because of Lorenzo, I know the password, as him and Y/N frequently visit.

The room is empty, and I wonder what I'm doing here. I shouldn't be anywhere near this place.

I also know how to get passed the traps that prevent boys from going to the girls dorm.

I hear silence from the other side of the door.

I want to knock, and I lift my hand to knock.

The door is there, but I can't seem to move.

I'm paralyzed by my own feelings and I am standing there, just looking a the piece of wood in front of me.

That's when the door opens.

It's her.

"Mattheo, what are you doing here?"

I stand staring at her, unable to form words.

She looks down at my bruised hand, and decides to ask questions later.

Instead she just decides to bring her arms around me and hold me.

The mere action of holding me, is my breaking point.

I snake my arms around her in return and hold on for dear life.

"Everything is going to be okay." She whispers softly.

I hold on tighter, almost as if she were an anchor, the thing keeping me tethered to reality.

I concentrate on her voice.

"You're okay,"