Gerard POV
"Do you have anything you wish to say?" my father starts uneasily.
My parents are on the couch, staring at me intently. I'm sat on the floor in front of our fireplace, my back facing them. They can't see my face, and I'm glad. I hear them shuffling around a bit, and I don't even open my eyes. My fingers are pressed together, my eyelids are tightly together, engulfing me in darkness. Dad coughs slightly, and I'm sure he wants me to answer.
But what do I say? How am I meant to be welcomed back home again? I don't know.
"No," and it comes out as a choke of a sob.
Then that's that. Tears have exploded silently from my eyes, streaming down my cheeks like an overflown waterfall. I'm not whimpering, or making sounds as I cry, it's silent, but my tears are still there, are still falling.
Mother gets up off the couch and kneels next to me, wrapping her arms around my body.
"It's okay," she whispers, stroking my illuminous red hair.
"No, it's not," I spat.
...................................
Nothing.
Dad gets up off of the couch and runs a hand through his hair. I wish Mikey was here with me. Here to share the pain. That sounds selfish, but it's not all my fault.
He's in his room, I suspect, and I'm worried about him. Mikey's not acting like himself, he's a bit rude now, and he just sits in his room with the light switched off. He doesn't read, he doesn't listen to music or write or do homework. He just sits in a pitch black room and closes his eyes. It's not him, it's an alien in his body.
I want my innocent baby brother back! I don't know how to retrieve him yet, and I guess that makes me a bad brother.
"Gerard?"
"Oh, yeah, what?" I mumble, returning to reality.
"Do you love him?" mum asks.
How do I answer? I don't answer at all. I don't need their pity. Instead, I break out of my mother's arms and stand up silently. My legs carry me over to the kitchen and I stare out of the back window, watch the snow fall happily and get soaked into the winter wonderland.
Birds chirp and sing, robins fly around the white garden, leaving mini footprints in the snow. I smile despite myself, and watch how families reunite and fly in groups into the air.
My eyes close for a second before I turn around into a different direction and open them again. Wait a second, why is the knife drawer open? Since when did we enter the kitchen at all today? I shrug, probably my imagination, and I go over to the drawer and close it- wait, it's empty. Where in the world has all the knives gone? Seriously, they don't just dissppear.
"Mum!" I call, and I step backwards slightly.
She enters with puffy red eyes and shakey fingers.
"Y-Yes?" she spits, shaking like she's cold.
"Where are all the knives?" I question, looking everywhere in the kitchen.
"How am I-I m-meant t-to k-know? A-Ask M-Mikey," she grumbles, leaving me alone again.
Michael? What in the world would he need those for?
I sigh and rub my eyes and let my legs carry me up the stairs. The hal;lway on the second floor is covered in dust and darkness, I switch the light on and the corridor is a right mess, books and furniture that needs to be thrown away scatter the floor.
I make my way down the hallway and come across a door with the sign M on it. I sigh and knock.
No answer.
"Mikes?" I call, silence.
I notice the door is unlocked so I push it open slightly, and my eyes start blinking rapidly, the room is dark too, of course. My hand roams around the wall that's exposed of his room in search of a light switch, and there it is. I press it and my eyes adjust to the light, blinking again.
"Mikes, where have all-" and I stop and my eyes go wide.
Red blurs my vision, red and black and white. Pure white skin soaked in red, and black clothes that cover my brother.
"MICHAEL!" I scream, because what else is left to do?
There is my baby brother, with black eyeliner on and black jeans and jacket, a rolled up sleave with a slice from a knife running down his arm, blood trickling out of the scar.
"Gerard," he snarls bitterly like I'm an outsider.
"W-What happened? Why?" I explode, and my hands ball into fists.
Why is he doing this? Self harming? What in the world is going on?
"Just leave," his voice returns calm, and I feel like punching something.
Calm? This is anything but calm!
YOU ARE READING
To The End (Frerard, Rikey)
Fanfiction"Make up already! Gee, Frank didn't kiss Sammy, Sammy assaulted and forced kissed Frank. Frank, Gerard only lies now because he thinks he's failed me, and he misses you so much," Mikey snapped, as if his cold side had just opened up again. It's not...
