With Him || Heehoon

CHAP 12

Heeseung's POV (surprise)

I knew this would happen.

Ok but surely i predicted it. I knew the moment I return here, the moment I return home, I'd lose my fucking mind.

I'd lose my mind because of someone.

Someone I haven't seen in years. Someone I've tried to forget and write off my life. Someone incredibly special to me. Park sunghoon.

It's him. It's all him.

I fell onto my bed. Looking at the ceiling. Sunghoon was just next door. He didn't even need to be here to mess with me. How this happened. I can't really tell.

He was just my best friend.

My best best friend.

We were inseparable. Somewhere along the line years ago, something changed.

My feelings changed.

Back in America, I tried to steer off this feelings. I was so convinced it wasn't right. I've stories and falling for my best friend was just Destin to ruin me and him.

I was just twelve and I was so confused, I did what I thought would be the final solution to every danm feelings.

I forgot him.

After all I wasn't attracted to other boys. Just him. So he was the problem.

I didn't write back. I didn't send a single thing to sunghoon, like I said I would.

I didn't know if he has this same feelings as I and if he did I wanted him to forget me too.

I dated girls. Lot of them. I was desperate to rid my mind from anything concerning sunghoon. It worked. At least I thought it did.

But then one time, I saw this good looking guy take his shirt off and I couldn't stop looking.

My mind immediately went back to sunghoon. 

'was he this good looking now?'

'does his body look like this?'

'did he have a boyfriend?'

The more these thoughts lingered, the more I escaped with girls.

I wasn't gay. So I told myself.

But then I realized the six years of playing bad boy was all for waste because the second I laid my eyes on sunghoon, I knew it. I was gay.

I was so gay.

"You're not sleeping right." My mom's voice asked from the other side of the door, following by a soft knock.

I sighed sitting up on the bed.

"On a Friday night? Do you even know me?"

The door opened to reveal my mom smiling as she let herself in.

"I'm going out with your farther and you're going out aren't you?"

"Yup." I replied standing on my feet. Letting my eyes fall in the two shirts on my bed .

"As soon as I figure which one of this one to where."

Mum sighed, "I hope your going with someone at least."

"Yes, sunghoon."

"Oh, sunghoon." Mom says sitting on the bed crossing her legs. "How are things with him?"

I eyed her warily before replying "good, not as before but, we're getting there."

"You still care about him don't you?"

"Yes mum, he's still my best friend." I said, although I care about him in a whole different way, much, much more.

The unusual silence made me turn to my mother and she was looking at me thoughtfully.

I frowned, "what is it mom."

She blinked chuckling as she stood to her feet.

"Nothing baby, have fun and take care of sunghoon. He's a good kid."

Don't need to tell me twice I like like him.

"Sure mom. Have fun too."

"I hope so and wear the black one, Suit you better."

Hearing my mom advice, I got dressed minutes later and I was already out the porch.

Sunghoon wasn't out so I waited by my car.

I'm surprised he even agreed to come to this party, although thankfully not because of Anna.

According to him he usually attend to parties, that's the only place to get free booze and he could do with booze.

I didn't understand him but he didn't want to tell, so I didn't press it. I understood that we couldn't exactly go back to how we used be before.

I disappointed him, I failed him. And I'm just glad that he let me spend time with him. That's enough for now.

I've always been the greedy one. I've always wanted more.

The sound of door closing brought me out of my thoughts and I turned to the house with a smile.

My smile dropped when I took in the frown on his face, his jaw was practically ticking. I jumped off my hood immediately.

He ran his hands through his hair, sighed and got his back off the door, that's when our eyes met.

His eyes twitched in what I know to be annoyance but it wasn't directed at me. Then in the blink of an eye, the look was gone and he had a poker face on.

"Hey." He greeted stopping right Infront of me. His beautiful brown eyes looked tired and I just wanted to hug him and embrace him in my arms.

"What's wrong?"

He sighed, like he was hoping I didn't ask that.

"My step dad is complaining about falling down." He smiled "I've had an earful it's annoying."

I knew he wasn't telling me the whole truth but I'll have to do with that for now, so I pretend to buy it. I nodded.

Then took a step back to check him out, ignoring the raised brow he was directing at me.

Beautiful doesn't even justify sunghoon. It's too small word. He's too good looking. The most handsome man I know.

From his vans, to his dark pants, from his black and white strips hoodie and the black jacket over it, then his messy hair. Perfection! There wasn't a single flaw.

"Danm, Hoon, you look good."

He rolled his eyes not taking me serious. Well his bad, because I've never been more serious.

"Get your sense back heeseung."

Heeseung.

I've always disliked my name. Why. Because in back in America many students teased me about it. So I went with my English name instead.

Sunghoon still call me heeseung and I don't want him to stop. It sounded exquisite coming from him. I Loved it. I always corrected him because I knew he would always call me heeseung afterwards.

"It's Ethan and my senses are still here. I know that because I can still smell you and you smell great." I pointed out. I know I was pushing it but right now, I couldn't help it.

Sunghoon frowned taking a step forward. "Are you taking me to the party or not, heeseung."

I gulped "I'm taking you to the party."

His lips twitched but he held In the smile.

"Good." He didn't wait for me before walking away and getting into the car.

I placed a hand over my thumping heart. This is going to be a long night.

_____________

Sheesh....

Have a great day 🦋💗

- Jay's side crush -