Childhood Crushes

Chapter Fourteen - Big Ben, The Clock Who Lives In France

Chapter Fourteen - Big Ben, The Clock Who Lives In France

Though Momma and I always watched movies together, listened to music, went out to eat and explored all around the city; Hazel was the one who taught me most about city life. Everyday, after we were done with school work, she would sit down with me at the computer and show me pictures of famous people she'd met; places she'd gone; places she would take me.

We had a lot of fun together, and some days I almost forgot about the pain in my heart from leaving my family behind back home and coming to live here; just to get away from certain people. Sometimes I felt so guilty all I wanted to do was cry. But I told Daddy on the phone the other day to come visit me sometime, and the boys to do that too. They haven't planned a trip yet, but I know they will soon.

Momma says they might not plan to come out here, and that maybe I should go see them, but I refuse to. I'm not going back there. And besides, they'll like it better here anyway. Hey, maybe they'll move here too!

And then there was Bale... I couldn't help but ask myself, all the time, whether he missed me at all. He hadn't tried to contact me, and I even told Daddy if Bale asked for the phone number here, to give it to him. That was a few days ago, and I still haven't heard from Bale.

"This," Hazel tapped the computer screen, "Is Big Ben. It's in London, and I want to go there someday. This is one of the world's greatest landmarks." She smiled proudly as if she owned this humongous clock.

I tried to nod appreciatively, but she knew I didn't really care that much about it. Biting her lower lip, she all of a sudden started tapping wildly at the keys on the laptop. I asked what she was up to, but didn't get an answer. Then, Google came up on the window. She typed in 'Bale Hax from Tennessee'.

Oh no.

"You're not going to find anything," I worded my hopeful thoughts, "He's only 14."

"That doesn't mean he's not a real person." She smiled deviously before clicking on one of the links and pulled up a picture. A picture of a boy in middle school on picture day. He was wearing a plaid button down shirt, his dark blonde hair was all messed up and his friendly blue eyes squinted in his wide smile.

This picture brought so many emotions. Happiness from all the memories, sickness from the last things I ever said to him, and heartache for leaving him behind too.

Hazel looked to me, then to the picture, then back again. "So, that's him." She already knew the answer, so this wasn't a question. I nodded and swallowed on my dry throat.

"Well, he's a cutie, I'll give you that." She smiled, admiring the picture in front of us on the screen.

"Yeah... Wait! Ew!" I hissed. How could she think Bale was cute? He's just a friend, and always will be just a friend. To both of us! Even though she doesn't know him...

"So I can have him?" She grinned excitedly.

The frown on my face made her laugh really loud, for some reason, and she didn't stop laughing for the longest time. "See!" She pointed to my face with one hand and clutched at her cramping belly with her other; while she continued to laugh. "That proves it!"

"Proves what?"

"That you like him!"

I didn't even begin to answer that. Even if I did put up a fight of that, she wouldn't believe me. All that mattered was that I knew the truth. Daddy always told me that's the only thing that ever matters.

...Sometimes...

"Well, your mom will be here soon to come get you... What do you want to do?" Hazel asked, closing the computer; as well as removing the picture. I couldn't tell if I was grateful for that or wanted it back...

"Um... Do you know how to Electric Slide?"

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We were laughing and falling over ourselves when Momma walked into Hazel's room. We were both trying our best to get the dance right, but even though we'd been doing it for the last twenty minutes, we kept bumping into each other or into her dresser.

Momma threw herself into our crazy dance; doing it perfectly and even adding a snap and a clap here and there. I smiled up at her and was proud to call her my momma. She was so cool! Though she keeps her cool all day and tries to look professional, she's still a country girl at heart.

"You ready to roll?" She laughed when the music ended. I nodded and gave Hazel a hug before following Momma out of Hazel's mom's large apartment. I don't think this was an apartment. It was huge! I could fit my room in Hazel's closet, and my room wasn't small anymore! Momma made good money, so I could only imagine what Hazel's mom and dad made.

"Did you have a good time, honey?" Momma asked on the way home. She looked tired; bags under her eyes and her forehead wrinkled a bit in worry, but she still kept up her smile.

"Yeah, we had a really good time! After we did our school work, we looked up music on YouTube and looked at places all around the world. Do you know Big Ben? It's a big clock, basically, so I don't know why they gave it a name... Anyway! It's really cool and it's in France-"

"London."

"-Right! London. And Hazel wants to go there sometime!... What's wrong Momma?" After realizing she just kept staring at the road and frowning, I stopped my story. She quickly put on her smile again and shook her head, "Nothing, baby." After a while, she sighed. "It's just, your father called... He wants you to come home."

She looked really hurt at this. I felt a stab in my own heart, too. Daddy wanted me to come home? I frowned and looked down at my new Mary Jane shoes, shining in the street lamps turning on, one by one, as the sky got a bit darker. Truth is, I wanted to come home too. But I didn't want to go back to Tennessee. Momma said I don't really have a future there, and what if she's right? She left, and look where she is now; a hot shot living in the city, driving a fancy car and eating sushi. What if I end up frying chicken and serving beer... I don't want to do that...

"What do you think?" Momma snapped me out of my thoughts. I looked up and saw we were already almost home. I'd been staring at my shoes and thinking for the past ten minutes or so...

"Well..." I mumbled, swallowing hard on the lump in my throat. What did I think? Do I want to stay here with Momma, or do I go home with Daddy and the boys? I'd lived with them all my life; I'd only lived with Momma for two weeks. I was making friends, I was trying new things... I wasn't the only girl in the house anymore.

"You don't have to answer right now, honey." Momma reasurred me, patting her hand on my knee as she turned into the parking garage of our apartment. "Just... If you ever feel like you want to go back home, just let me know." She turned to me and put on another smile after parking the car. "Simple as that."

Right... Simple as that...