unsteady // g.d. // completed

ten.

He briefly eyed me as he led her outside, her towing behind obliviously. I feel my stomach turn.
"Please Gia, let me tell him something," Liz sighs as she glares at them. I shake my head, looking back down at the bar in front of me.
"I want another drink."
This is one of those instances where I end up doing something stupid like drinking myself out of it, or attempting to. I downed three strong drinks in the fifteen minute period he smoked and joked with his girl in front of the bars tinted window that took up most of the wall. I was feeling a little fuzzy now. Liz had gotten up to play a drinking game with the bartender she flirted with at a table close to where I sat since his shift just ended. I saw a couple of guys and a girl approach George outside, one leaving the group to walk in. We make eye contact, him smiling at me.
"Adam," I giggle as he approaches.
"Hey Gia," he smiles as he puts his hands in his black leather jacket. I pat the bar stool next to me, he laughs as he takes a seat.
"Um, so I'm guessing you've seen George," he looks down, avoiding my gaze.
I shrug, "I didn't think we had a thing."
He's silent for a bit.
"Want to dance?" I smile at him, trying to push that thought aside. I was almost drunk and the last thing I wanted to be was sad. I felt tingly and great.
"To this?" He laughs softly.
I try to make out what's faintly playing, the sports channels and loud drunks not helping. I laugh when I make it out to be some folk song. "Okay maybe not this."
I mess with my white hoodie sleeve as I think of something to say.
"Shouldn't you be getting back to your crew?" I nod in the direction behind him where the window is. He shakes his head.
"Ross bailed," he simply says. I raise an eyebrow once I see the two guys and their two picture perfect girls laughing as they walk in. I then look over to Liz who's encouraging a girl that joined the game to take a shot.
"Want to leave?" I bite my lip as George's group thankfully stops to sit at a table by the entrance.
He nods, and stands up, me doing the same, but I stumble, grabbing onto him making us laugh to ourselves. I link my arm with his and my heart beats faster as we walk towards the front of the bar.
"Don't pay attention to them. They're drunk," Adam mumbles as we walk closer. We are in their line of view now, everything seems to play out in slow motion. George's eyes tear away from hers, looking at me guiltily. I break his gaze, staring in front of me with a blank face, head held high. I don't want him to know he actually hurt me. As we walk out, we quietly make our way to the end of the block.
"Where are we going?" Adam looks around.
"Um, I didn't think this far," I nervously laugh.
He grins then continues walking, leading me to another bar that's not too far from the one we just left.
"I'll grab drinks, you pick a spot," He unlinks his arm from mine, giving me a small smile after I nod.
I pick a spot at a table towards the back. I swing my bag into the seat next to me, looking around the bar that was less crowded than the last. I turn my attention to one of the flat screens on the wall that was playing a music video that went along with the music coming from the speakers in the place. Adam comes back with two beers, setting one in front of me, then sitting in the seat across from mine.
I thank him then take a sip, remembering this was the same brand he handed me the last time I was at George's.
There's a commercial on now that's an ad for dog chow. I laugh at it as it shows the small brown puppy rolling around.
"It's so cute," Adam chuckles with me.
I nod, "I want a puppy now."
The ad ends and there's a new song coming on. I freeze as the drums kick in and it's no other than-
"Hey there's our music video," Adam mumbles. I almost forgot he was there. The camera pans in, then the screen switches to Matty behind a mic, holding a guitar, his hair all over the place.
"Don't call it a fight if you know it's a war."
The video flips to many different areas, showing Adam and Ross, and the warehouse setting. My eyes never leave the screen until I notice Adams looking at me at a part where George is on the screen again. I turn my gaze back to the screen, smiling as the same guy in front of me is shown.
"Hey who's that guy," I giggle pointing to the tv. He drops the seemingly concerned look on his face and smiles.
"This is from our first EP. I can't believe they're playing this," he softly laughs, staring at the tv.
"Ross looks so mysterious with his hoodie," I joke. We both laugh. I turn my attention to Adam now, bobbing my head and pretending to play guitar.
He chuckles then joins me with the air guitar playing but then it just turns into silly dancing between us. The music video ends and we laugh together, immediately taking a sip of beer.
"Not bad Adam," I smile.
He puts his hands together and slightly bows, then chuckles.
"Glad you enjoyed the show," a hand slams on to the table making my eyes dart to the person now beside me. I glare at him.
"G, what are you doing?" Adam groans slightly as George takes a seat.
"Can I not talk to my band mate?" George leans in on the table, his arms supporting him.
Adam shrugs, exchanging a quick glance with me.
"So can someone tell me what's going on here?" George's glossy eyes indicated he was drunk, as he looks from me to Adam.
"Why are you jealous?" I sarcastically laugh, grabbing my beer.
"Don't think there's anything to be jealous over, love," he smirks now, and I feel anger rising in me. As a million things that I would do to him in this situation cross my mind, I set my beer down and grab my bag, quickly walking out of the place. Tears threaten to fall as I stomp back towards the other bar, hoping to find Liz. I felt hurt, angry, and worthless all at once.
"Gia," George calls out from behind me. I stop in front of an alleyway and turn around to see him walking closer to me.
"Fuck off," I snap, still trying to hold myself from crying.
As I turn back around to walk away he grabs my arm and makes me face him.
"Listen," he calmly says.
"Get away from me." I push his arm away.
"I just want to explain why we can't-"
"Fuck off!" I exclaim, my voice slightly cracking. It's too late and I break. His facial expression turns to confused as he's unsure of what to do. I sniffle trying to wipe tears away with my hoodie sleeve.
"Just please leave me alone," I mumble, turning back around to walk away.
"I'm sorry," he calls out as he follows behind me.
"Tell that to your girl," I snap, getting myself together as I get closer to the bar.
"Please," he softly says as he gently grabs my hand, stopping me. He pulls me so I'm facing him again, then let's go of my hand and holds my face. He wipes my tears away and quietly studies my face. I open my mouth to say something but he pushes his lips to mine, kissing me roughly, possibly due to all the alcohol he's probably had. Im startled at first but then give in. He pushes me up against the brick wall of some random building, one hand grabbing a handful of my hair, the other gripping my waist tightly. I promised myself I wouldn't let my guard down around guys ever again, but he blind sided me.

I end up at his flat, pushed up against a wall once again. George pulls away from the kiss to pull my hoodie over my head, taking my shirt with it.
"George I'm not sure if I want to-"
He interrupts by quietly shushing me.
I look over at his hand that now lightly traces the fading purple colored bruise on my collarbone, pushing my bra strap aside.
"Did I do that?" He whispers as he studies it, I nod in response.
He bends over, kissing the bruise softly, then my lips.
"I don't ever want to intentionally hurt you."
He pushes my hair out of my face, then kisses my forehead. If only he knew I was hurt.
"You tired?"
I shrug in response, holding his hand in place as it rests on the side of my face. He softly smiles, kissing me again, then picks me up and carries me to his bed. This man confuses the hell out of me, but I loved it.

I heard rustling next to me, turning over on my back and rubbing my eyes before opening them. I think back to last night, remembering at was at George's.
"G," I croak sleepily, opening my eyes. He's sat up on the bed, looking down at me.
"Gigi," he mimics me with a grin on his face.
"Hey, that's rude," I laugh, playfully punching his arm which does nothing against his apparent biceps. He chuckles, apologizing. I study the shirtless figure next to me, hair messy, goofy grin. I sit up, crossing my legs like his, rubbing my eyes once more. I look at my bare legs and his shirt I was now wearing, remembering last night him telling me it looked so much better on me than him. I lean my head against his shoulder, but he pulls away instantly, standing up.
"Breakfast?" It's more of a rhetorical question he asks, never looking at me but around his room as if he's looking for something. I sigh, mentally cursing at myself for pulling such a dumb move. He walks out, I hesitantly crawl off the bed and follow a good distance behind him. I'm so stupid. I pull out a stool from the island and sit on it as he searches through the fridge.
"Wait, do you even eat eggs?" He turns to me, egg carton in hand, I immediately scrunch my nose. He chuckles, "I guess not."
He turns around and puts the eggs back, "What about waffles?" He calls out.
"Yes!" I agree a little too enthusiastically.
"Waffles it is."
I watch him get all the ingredients out, making sure to leave out the eggs. It's silent for awhile as he mixes the ingredients and I feel like he's ignoring me. I hop off the stool and walk over to his cd collection. There were tons of them, a lot of them favorites of my own. I take my time looking at them. I finally cross an irresistible album which I take, popping it into to CD player. I turn down the volume before pressing play, being cautious due to last time. I smile to myself as the beat kicks in, then guitars. I sit down on the carpet then lay back, softly singing along.
"I dreamt about you nearly every night this week. How many secrets can you keep?"
Arctic Moneys were always a favorite of mine. My smile fades as I realize how relevant the lyrics were to my relationship with George.
"Do I wanna know, if this feeling flows both ways? Sad to see you go, was sorta hoping you'd stay."
I sigh almost pushing myself up to turn it off but I jump as there's a yelp from the kitchen.
"Sorry, I burned myself," George calls out. I shake my head and smile to myself. I push myself up and skip to the second to last track then sit back on the floor. The intro plays, I softly hum along with the words.
"You call the shots babe, I just wanna be yours."
I stand up and softly twirl, the shirt going up as I spin. I look over to George who's already looking at me intently. He smiles at me which causes me to blush. I felt like a kid with a ridiculous crush. I look down as he approaches me, grabbing me by the waist to face him, guiding my arms to wrap around his neck. He presses his lips to mine, slowly kissing me. It riles up something inside me just like all the other times we've kissed.
"Maybe I just wanna be yours, I wanna be yours, wanna be yours..."
"Gia," he mumbles, pulling away from the kiss. I look up to him, waiting for him to say something else.
"We can't do this anymore."