My Player Bestfriend (Book #1)

Chapter Seventeen

*Three Months Later*

I woke up with my stupid alarm. I hurried up and got ready for school. Jackie's picking me up. She told me to stay put, and not to move. I'm not really sure but she sounded like she was panicking, which is never good. I heard a car pull up. Speak of the devil.

"Hey." She smiled.

"Hi?" I was utterly confused by her behavior. 

She stayed silent as we drove to school. Then I awkwardly walked to first period. There's something that's not right.

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*Lunch*

"Okay, why is everyone acting so weird?" I asked as I sat down at the table; between Jackie and Sarah.

They looked at eachother, then looked at me. Then they looked at Alex and Robert then me. The boys nodded.

"Look." Jackie sighed.

She took out her phone and pulled up twitter. She pulled up a picture. My heart shattered into a million pieces as I looked at it. It was Austin, at the beach with Stefanie Scott. He was holding her from behind and kissing her cheek. The caption was even worse.

@AustinMahone: With the Boo @StefanieScott at the beach ;* I love you baby (:

I was crushed. No. I am crushed. So much for forever. I looked down. I don't know what to do with myself.

"Are you okay?" Sarah asked.

"Y-yeah, of course. Why-why wouldn't I be?" I cracked. 

My voice cracked, and I was about to cry. I damn well wasn't letting my friends see me cry. I stood up, and as soon as I did tears started to flow. I ran out of the cafeteria doors and ran down the road. There were footsteps behind me, and people calling my name but I didn't listen. I though I was the "Boo." He only called me that. Only me. He knew I was going to see it. He knew that he was breaking me. He knew. I know, he knew. He knew everything. I sat on the curb, and cried with my head in my hands. Soon, I felt the prescence of someone sitting next to me. Rubbing circles in my back. I looked up. Suddenly, I came to realize Austin wasn't the one. He wasn't comforting me. I realized at that moment that I would never feel him comforting me ever again. I love him. I miss him. I want him. And I need him. But, now...it's too late. 

"Mary, it'll be okay." Robert said pulling me into his side.

"No it won't." I shook my head as I cried.

"Yes. Yes it will." He said.

"No. It will never be okay. I screwed up everything." I said.

"Mary, I swear he'll come around. You guys will be friends again." He tried to shush me.

"You don't get." I said raising my voice. "Nobody gets it. I screwed up everything. I'm a screw up. All I do I fuck everything up for everyone. I'm a disappointment, and a failure. I'm worthless. I'm hopeless. I'm nothing but numb." I shouted.

"No." He grabbed my arms. "You are more than that. You aren't any of those things. You're amazing. You're the most beautiful girl in the world. I love you. Austin, believe it or not...he loves you too. He just doesn't want to get hurt anymore." Robert explained.

Did he just-Did he say that he loves me?

I was completely taken back. No. No. No. I pushed him away. I ran, I ran as fast as humanly possibly. I got to my house, ran up to my door, and locked it. I continued into my bathroom. I pulled up my sleeves. I sat on the toilet and ran my fingers through my hair in frustration. Is it worth this? Am I worth this? No. I'm worthless. Nobody cares. Nobody cares. They're just pretending. The worst  part of this is that Austin doesn't care. He never did, and he never will. I can't live watching him with someone else. I walked out of the bathroom and grabbed a pen and some paper. I wrote as neat as possible.

Today, I will leave this Earth. You know, it's not as great as everyone thinks. Life isn't as great as it seems. I can't go on being hurt. I can't go on living life knowing having the one that I love isn't with me. We drifted apart because of my stupid mistakes. Don't worry, when you read this I'll be in peace. All my pain will be gone, I'll be happy and hopefully everyone I love will be happy too. I love you Austin. I'm done dealing with all of this. I'm worthless, hopeless, and a screw up. I don't want anyone to cry, I don't want anyone to mourn just know that I love you, and I'll forever be watching over you all. Love is key. 

                                                                            Love, Mary 

I paced around my room for a while. I turned on Last Resort by Papa Roach and put it on replay. I put it on really loud. I opened the bathroom door and turned the light on. I opened my box in my cabinet. I pulled out the razor. I turned on the shower and jumped in with my clothes on. I had placed the letter on the sink. I winced as I put the blade to my skin. I wrote the letter H.O.P.L.E.S.S and just watched the blood drip down my arm. I could feel my body losing blood. I knew at that moment that I was dying. And I also realized that I didn't want to. But, I was paralyzed. I couldn't move because I had gone into shock. I started to cry silently. 

"I love you Austin, I love you." I said to myself.

Then it all went black.

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A/N: Whaaaaaat? Nobody expected it. What do you think of the plot twist? What do you guys think? Did she die? Is she dead? If so, what will Austin do? What will anyone do? Is what she said what she meant? When choosing between life or death, she chose death...but is she really dead? Find out soon :p Comment tell me what you think. <3