I'm in love with my bully (Leonetta)

Chapter 11 - Always on my mind

V i o l e t t a

My eyes opened slowly, getting used to the morning light coming through the two windows.. Wait what? There weren't two windows in my room, only one. I sat up in bed, and realised I was in an unfamiliar room.

What even happened yesterday? I remember going to the kitchen after our m-moment with Leon to get a drink and then.. blank.

It didn't take a genius to understand that I got drunk. I looked around to see if Leon had left me any clothes but let out a small 'eek' when I saw him sleeping right next to me.

Thankfully, my sudden burst didn't wake him up. I got up quickly, and left his house as quietly as I could. Then, not even bothering to check my appearance, I rushed to mine because, let's face it, I was already dead. Dad would kill me.

When I arrived home, I saw a worried sick dad and Angie. Olga was crying on Ramallo's shoulder. Don't tell me that this happened because of me..

My dad noticed me and with wide eyes, he took me in his arms, taking the air out of me. "Where were you, Violetta?"

Another lie to add to the list. "Don't worry dad, I slept over at Francesca's afterwards because the party ended pretty late. I know I should've told you, it was wrong, I'm sorry." I looked down, playing the victim. Let this work please..

"It was a mistake not to call. You at least understood that it was a mistake. What matters is that you're safe. I won't ground you this once, but I bet your ass there won't be a next time!" He warned me, and I was taken aback by how calm he was.

Is this my dad?

He kissed my forehead when I nodded silently, and walked to his office. Busy man, my dad is.

It was a sunny day, and it was Sunday, so I was free once more. I decided not to let this day get wasted and go for a walk at the park Leon took me a week ago.

I changed quickly into something more casual than the party clothes, took my make up off, that had now been smudged and ruined, and left my house to go to the park.

- - -

On my way there, I saw him sitting on a bench, a bit further away than his favourite bench, now my favourite too.

By him I mean none other than Leon, obviously.

I approached him and sat down next to him. "Hey."

I think my presence suprised him, because he jumped a little when he saw me. "Uh, hey." He looked at me a bit longer, "You left before and I was worried."

"You were worried about me?" I wanted to 'awww' but of course I wouldn't out loud.

"Why? Can't I care about a person?" He looked offended.

I rushed to answer, "No, no, it's just..you surprise me, Leon."

He studied me, and I felt myself tense under his gaze. It was making me uncomfortable.

"Look Violetta, after what happened, I can't seem to forget about it."

"Can't forget about what?"

"Yesterday's events," He started, and I gave him a confused look, "When Francesca, uh, interrupted us.."

I totally forgot about that.. It seems like, wherever I go, I can't escape Leon and more importantly, I can't escape being closer to him.

I took a deep breath. This was going to be hard. "Ehm, Leon, I-I think that it would be better if we just forgot about it."

His jaw dropped, "No, Violetta, are you serious? I can't! It happened so many times before, and now again, how can I put it past me?"

"Leon I told you, I want us to be friends!" I knew I sounded annoying, I could see it in his expression.

"Friends? Then why did I find you leaning in too yesterday?" His question caught me off guard. What was I supposed to answer?

I wanted to tell him that it was because I had feelings for him. But instead, I ruined it all.

"It was a huge mistake. It should've never ever happened."

He looked like he was at loss for words. It was that moment, I knew I had crossed a line.

He insisted, "Yes but it did happen. What if we hadn't been interrupted? What if it had indeed been a kiss?"

"It would be the worst kiss of my life!" I blurt out, trying to put an end to this frustrating conversation, when I actually made it worse.

I saw the hurt in his eyes and my eyes softened. My heart couldn't bear him looking this sad. I immediately regretted what I had said. He treated you awfully at first, though, a little voice reminded me. But that was weeks, almost a month ago! I have seen a part of his different side. His sweet side.

"Leon I-I, I'm s-sorry.." I started, but he interrupted me by a shake of his head.

"No, it's okay. I should've known that you never felt anything." He turned around to leave, but I grabbed his hand and stopped him.

"I don't know what's happening to me, it's really confusing. It's a first, it has never happened to me before. I just need time." I sighed, turning my gaze to the ground.

"Time?"

"Yes. I will be ready someday. But I can't right now. And I can't forget about our little moments either. You know what I mean.." I trailed off, feeling my cheeks heat up.

"I do, but Violetta.. if you ask me to simply erase it from my mind, then don't expect me to do that. I can't."

I sighed. This was frustrating. "But Leon.."

"No, Violetta. You can't just ask that from me. This is all new for me, I haven't felt like this in forever, and now you demand that I put these feelings aside because you want to stay friends?" I could see the way he spit out the word friends, and honestly, it was kind of cute that he disagreed.

"What was that you felt?" I pushed it a little further.

"I don't know. It was a strong feeling. It is a strong feeling, and it's not going away soon. But I need to know." He fixed his gaze on me, and I gulped.

"Know what?" I retorted with a question.

"I need to know if you felt something too."

I stood there speechless, not being able to come up with a reply. I really wanted to assure him, to tell him that I only need a little more time, but I couldn't get any words out.

"Leon I--"

He must've taken my silence as an answer."I understand. You could've just told me that there was nothing between us to ever begin with."

He let go of my hand and turned to walk away, this time for real. I couldn't let this happen. I simply couldn't.

I ran up to him. He heard footsteps but I didn't wait for him to turn around, I stood infront of him before he walked away.

"Leon.." I started, and he waited, an unreadable look in his eyes, "I did." I swifted my weight to my other foot, anxiously.

"Huh?"

"I did feel something." I explained so he could understand, and his expression immediately softened.

What happened next, I think it was the first time I had felt that way. Leon pulled me into a hug, a tight, heartwarming hug, that neither crushed my bones nor was a careless one. It was the first time someone had made me feel so.. full. And that was coming from the person that had no intentions of ever being nice to me in the beginning.

There is future between us. For that I'm sure. What I'm not sure for, is what I feel for him. It's rather strong, and it's starting to trouble me a lot.