blurry face - phan

chapter three

// short-er-ish chapter soz :) //

dan

Dan thinks he may have gone a little too far.

Phil is very pissed off at him now. As soon as Dan quoted the song, Phil just rolled his eyes and looked away, a scowl on his thin, pink lips. Dan tries to concentrate on class, but his eyes keep sneaking glances at Phil's face, almost as if he's worried that when he looks back Phil's face will be a blur - just like everyone else's.

"Will you stop staring at me you freaking creep?" Phil asks angrily, glaring as he turns towards Dan, "it's fucking weird and unnerving."

"Sorry," Dan mumbles, looking down at his notebook again, losing all of the little confidence he had, "I'll stop."

"Thank you," Phil says, rolling his eyes and looking back to the front.

Dan starts drawing in the back of his notebook, a sketch - his first one of a face, but as he joins the features up they turn to a blur, so he flips a page and starts scribbling a tiger. Half way through he notices Phil watching sneakily.

"Will you stop staring at my book?" Dan asks, mimicking Phil's tone, "it's fucking creepy."

Phil scowls at Dan, his blue eyes cold and annoyed. Dan didn't understand why Phil was so straight up mean to people, he knew that led to a lonely life. And honestly, a lonely life was what Dan feared.

"Look blurry face, or whatever the fuck your name actually is, I'm trying to concentrate, and I'm also trying to resist the urge to punch you," Phil says, "and you are making that very difficult."

"Are you rude to everyone you meet?" Dan asks, looking over at Phil cautiously, meeting his blue eyes, and Dan literally feels chills - he's never made eye contact before so this is all new to him.

"Yes," Phil replies simply, breaking eye contact and looking straight ahead again.

"Why?" Dan asks.

"Because, I don't want friends."

"Why?"

"Because I don't see a point in them."

"Why?"

"Because of what they bring. Everything has a consequence; trusting brings betrayal, joy brings pain, loving brings loss - it's the vicious circle of life."

"If you find a true friend though, it's worth it."

"Not to me."

"Well that must be because you've never experienced a true friendship."

"And I don't want to."

"Then I pity you."

"Why?"

"Because, a life alone is sad. You have no home, no one to turn to, nothing to love. There's no light in your world."

"There is, it's this amazing thing called drugs."

Dan smiles sadly at Phil. Despite the fact that he's scowling, Dan can feel the pain, and hear it in his voice. Due to not being able to see faces (until Phil) Dan has learnt to tell emotion purely off tone and body language. Phil is upset, Dan can tell. Dan knows what Phil feels like though, he himself was once functioning off artificial happiness.

"Drugs don't bring happiness," Dan says.

"You don't know that," Phil snaps, "I know your type, a mummy's boy, nerd, do-gooder with your perfect life. It isn't like that for everyone you know."