Love Until It Hurts (Monteverde Series 4)

11

Chapter Eleven

Someone was playing with my hair. I stirred and groaned. Nagmulat ako ng mga mata at lumingon sa tabi ko, unti-unti akong napangiti nang makita kong nakatingin sa akin si Sam habang sinusuklay ang buhok ko. Madalas niya itong ginagawa dati. She knows how much I love it when she plays with my hair.

            "Good morning," I greeted with my weird just-woke-up voice. I put my leg over hers and she pressed her cheek against my chest.

            Nahigit ko ang hininga ko bago muling napapikit. Ipinatong ko ang kamay ko sa mukha niya bago masuyong hinaplos ang pisngi niya.

            We didn't have sex. Sex is when you fuck someone without feelings involved. But with all the emotions bursting simultaneously inside me last night, I highly doubt that it was just pure sex. It was something more than that.

            "What time are you going to leave?" she asked blatantly though her voice held no derision. I wasn't a bit shocked when I felt the familiar sting again. I had to stare at the ceiling so she wouldn't see the hurt flashing in and out of my eyes. I had no right to feel this way. After what I did, after what I made her do, I'm not the one who's supposed to be hurting.

            "You want me to leave?" I questioned as calmly as I could.

            "Of course not, Zade, but Jen will be home by twelve noon. Hindi siya umuwi rito kagabi kasi umuwi 'yung Ate niya mula sa Doha kaya ro'n muna siya sa bahay nila nagstay. Magagalit 'yon kapag nakita ka na naman n'yang nandito."

            Tumango ako. Pinisil ko ang ilong niya. "Then, I'll leave at 11:50 I guess," sagot ko.

            Pinagtaasan niya ako ng kilay at natawa naman ako.

            "What?" I asked innocently.

            Idinukdok niya ang ulo niya sa dibdib ko at saka ako marahang sinampal-sampal sa mukha. I felt nostalgic when she did that to me. Her gesture pulled me back to our past and it made me feel something I couldn't quite comprehend.

            "April 11. Four years ago. Do you still remember what happened that night?" mahina kong tanong habang nakapalibot sa kanya ang mga braso ko.

            She took a deep breath before nodding.

            "How could I forget? That night, we lost our virginity to each other." Her reply was the faintest of whispers but still, it sent tremors down the spine. I shivered as my mind shifted back to that particular memory. Suddenly, I felt nauseous and sad, wistful and dreamy. Sam can always unleash feelings I never knew I had the capacity to feel.

            She looked like the first ray of sunlight and the first drop of rain.

            She was starlight and gold glitter, magic with a sprinkle of silver.

            She was a rainbow and then a mirage.

            She is that kind of beautiful.

            "Zade, ano'ng tumatakbo sa isip mo ngayon?" biglaang tanong niya. Napahinto ako. I'm glad she couldn't read my mind, because if she could, then she might run away. My mind is full of unsaid things. Things I do not have the courage to utter, things that are half truths and things that can break hearts.

            "Business," maikli kong tugon.

            "Masaya ako na unti-unti mo nang natutupad ang mga pangarap mo."