diary of a insecure fat girl (being edited & revamped)

chapter 8

Naomi POV

I woke up laying in cj's chest, I wanted to get up but I didn't want to wake him ,so I just sat there thinking about yesturday.

I did say some mean ass shit but it was the truth. what they thought they could bring him in my life and I just open my arms and scream daddy? hell naww, maybe when I was 10 but not now they can kiss my black ass, but I should go apologize cause at the end of the day I love my moma and Nanny for even trying to get him in my life, they just want the best for me but I will let them and him know that I don't want nothing to do with him.

" babe you up " CJ said knocking me out my thoughts.

" yea " I said

" you feeling any better " he asked sitting up and pulling me up with him.

He know I'm too big for this

" yea, Its just all so fucking stupid, why bring him in my life now, why come now, I already got plenty on my plate why overflow it" I said playing with his tattoos .

" well babe think of it in there perspective, yo nanna only wants what's best for you and your mom does too, mabey they feel like you should at least know who he is, mabey they don't care about if he in yo life or not they just wanted you to know " he said making me feel better this boy has me in a trans I swear!!!!

" yea I never though of it like that, uggh lets change the subject ... so how you like my slow ass family " I asked laughing.

" I love your nanna that lady is crazy and everybody's cool though and your mom ,shes a beauty" he said kissing my forehead .

"aawww thanks baby " i said kissing his lips, his hands were on my lower back and I remembered that I didn't have on any bottoms just a tee shirt and a thong.

" I know this a stupid question, but why haven't you lost your virginity?" he said looking at me. I layed my head on his chest and took a deep breathe before telling him.

" because my mom was raped by my uncle that's now in prison, but he raped her when she was young and she never talked to me about sex and loosing it, so I was always scared to cause I mean she didn't get to loose it with who she thought was right to take it so I promised her that I would loose it when I found who I thought was special enough to take it."

" well I'm gonna try my best to be that person " he said making my kool aid man smile spread across my face.

" well what if I told you that you were that special one, and that I want you ....now " I said looking up at him and he rolled us over, now he was on top of me smiling, he kissed me on my lips to my neck, he was slowly taking my shirt off and once it was off he started kissing me on my chest taking my bra off, he cupped on of my breasts and was sucking the other one, he then started kissing down my stomach to my thighs, he felt my wettness and started playing with me, teasing and shit, he pulled my panties off and started to eat me out, after me Cuming twice he finally, with warning, stuck his soldier in me, he stuck his head in and it hurted like hell, he inched in me and stopped so I could get use to his thickness, without warning this time he went all the way in.

he was so gentle with me, after I was use to it he started picking up speed the faster he went the louder I got.

" AWWW FUCK CH.....CHAZ AHHH" I said Cummings all over him. I was shaking hurting and hot all at once, that shit hurt like hell, but it was worth it cause it was with him.

I tried to get up but fell in the process .

" come on " he said laughing picking me up and running me a hot bath in the Jacuzzi tub and sat me in it while he took a shower.