The Unforgivable Journal

Chapter Twenty Seven

*DOCTOR'S POV*

"You two don't have to help. I can do it," I mumble, looking at Psi and Vastra. "Just stand back."

She's going to die if I don't do anything, and I can't let my Impossible girl go. Clara absorbed all of my regeneration energy, and she'll die if she doesn't release it. But the problem lies way beneath how simple that sounds. She's human. The only way that regeneration energy can be exerted if it's taken out.

I understand that she took it so she didn't have to see me regenerate, but she's unconscious, almost dead, and I'll have to regenerate in order to save her. She won't have to see me, but she'll have to understand, when she sees the new me, that I did it for her.

Deep down, I want to stay this way - quirky, crazy, bowtie-loving, and just overall weird. I might up being a mean, 80 year old crank. Knowing Clara, all 3 of her, I don't think she would want to travel with someone like that. We get along so well because, well, I look pretty damn good for being 1200 hundred something years old, I think. 

"Clara," I say aloud, ignoring the fact that I can telepathically speak to her. She might hear me better out loud. "I know this isn't what you wanted, but I need you alive. I need you safe, and this is for you. This is to keep us all moving. I'm going to change, and you might not want me to, but it's going to happen. I might be a five year old girl, or I might be a ninety year old man in a wheelchair. It matters, I know, but remember that it's always me. I might be completely different, but on the inside, I'm still the same person. I'll still care for you. And you'll always be my best friend.

"We all change. When you think about it, we're all different people, all through our lives. And that's okay, that's good, you gotta keep moving, so long as you remember all the people that you used to be. I will not forget one line of this, not one day. I swear. I will always remember when the Doctor was me."  

I kneel down next to Clara's still-body with teary eyes and place my hand on her heart. Slowly, yellow energy surrounds my hand and travels up my arm, flooding my blood stream. My hearts begin to race and suddenly, the yellow light envelopes my body. I quickly back away, keeping my distance from Clara, as well as Psi and Vastra.

My head whips back and the regeneration energy roars through my veins and all around. This time, it might be quick. Last regeneration, it was so long, and I hope it isn't that way again.

I double over and my face contorts, and right there, the regeneration energy fades away, and I stand back up.

It's done.

Everything feels different, but I can't put my finger on it. My skin feels looser too. My hair isn't poking into my vision. Oh, I know what's different.

"Kidneys! "

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Author's Note: Sorry about the short chapters. I'm just getting back into writing this :)

Oh, and you should totally check out my story Fixed. I updated it yesterday {>o<}