Smoked Success

18.

I mean, okay I still smoked, but never have I ever turned back tests smelling like cigarettes. Also, I've never smoked anytime near class time, not even during breaks, lipstick covers my lips everyday. What'd make him think I do? It's no shame to smoke, but a mother and a smoker don't really mix well. Should I be honest or should I lie? I'll just ask him what makes him think I do smoke. 

"Why'd you say so?" I narrow my eyes in totally fake confusion, hoping to not seem like I'm lying. 

"These Marlboro packs on your bedside table?" He points at the table, and shit I forgot to hide them. I always hid my packs, but I completely forgot today, since I went running. I don't think I should lie about this, because I'm a horrible liar. But if I tell him the truth, he might tell his classmates and they'd all judge me for doing so. Who cares what they say, I'll just tell him the truth. 

"Yes I do." I try to be as direct and brief as possible. I really need to ease down my stress at the moment, but it just gets higher. 

"Great, another smoker on the list." He mutters, rolling his eyes. I narrow my eyes, not understanding what he's talking about. I'm frozen in place, not knowing what to do or say. "Got to go, see you tomorrow Jessica." Andrew waves and gets out of my room. I'm glad this is over. 

And another Friday's done, I'm so glad it's finally the vacation. This week's been very wild, all my classes had tests, since they prefer no tests in the beginning of the new year. The projects have all been presented by everyone, which I'm very thankful for. All I have left is one hour with Andrew, LAX, IAD, and then I meet my daughter. Andrew and I have decided we'd exchange gifts, since we're now 'friends'. It's nice to be friends with a student, they feel more comfortable in your class. It's nothing illegal anyway, he's twenty seven, don't forget. I'm now heading home, in my car. It's not a brand new one, but it's what I could afford for now. What happens when you stop living with your parents. I had another meeting with the pedagogical team, we're talking about the seniors' curriculum, it's sort of longer than the school days. It's not really working out, so they're probably getting extra days during the summer, you know before they graduate. I'm glad I've packed everything I need, because I won't have the time to do so when Andrew leaves today. I eat my typical salad and head to the roof, where I smoke. It's where I smoke since I don't like my room to smell like cigarettes, which may make some persons uncomfortable. This is my once a week time, and yes I'm risking it before Andrew comes. I won't have to explain the whole thing, he'll just know. 

"Merry Christmas Andrew." I smile at him, handing him my gift. It's a Balmain fragrance, hope that's good enough. I am very excited for this time of the year, has always been my favorite. I feel overwhelmed, these past months have passed very quickly I'm shocked. 

"Merry Christmas Jessica." He grins, handing me a normal sized box. Hope there won't be something very expensive in it. "No opening before Christmas." 

"I promised, and I never break my promises." I laugh, trying to ease the atmosphere around us. "I wish we could hang out longer, but I have to leave." 

"Where to?" He knots his eyebrows in confusion, and narrows his eyes. 

"LAX, I'm going to DC for the holidays." I announce, hoping I do not stress him. 

"You want a ride?" He offers. I do not know if I should refuse this or not, I mean there's nothing wrong with that, but I'd interrupt him and he probably has a party coming up for the holidays. "Come on, LAX's on my way, so it's fine." 

"Fine." I roll my eyes, taking my purse off the bedside table. I head out of my room to say goodbye to Carmel, Sasha's already gone. I'll miss Carmel, but she says she'll be fine on her own. She'll probably go naked all around the room, and do whatever she likes to do with her boyfriend, known as her boss. It's so fucked up, but she likes it this way. "Carmel, I got to go."

"I'll miss you so much." She glances up at me, giving me a sad smile. "Don't forget to get me candy." I forgot to tell you, Carmel loves candy more than anything, it was her favorite food, even though I didn't consider it as one. 

"Sure." I roll my eyes, and notice that Andrew's taken out my luggage, one bag. "See you next week." I hug her quickly, hoping not to leave Andrew alone more than this. It'd be awkward for both of us, so I walk out of the loft. 

"Thank you so much." I smile at Andrew, walking out of the car. I cannot believe this friendship will probably be over in a year or so. I think I've also forgotten to tell you that I've been going out with Smith, for two weeks now. We still didn't make it official, us dating and all, but we've shared a few kisses here and there. 

"Anytime. Merry Christmas and happy new year." He shows his dimples, making his crinkling eyes twinkle. I shake his hand and get inside the airport. I do all the necessary steps, glad this is a domestic flight, less stuff to do. Mom has called a few minutes ago, telling me that she's in the airplane with Angelina, on their way from London to Washington. Dad's not coming, since he hasn't spent last Christmas with grandma Twist. It sucks, but we'll have to deal with that. I'm waiting for my flight, so I start reading, some writers are really good, like Charles Dickens for example. 

I'm finally in Washington, the airport looks the same from last year. Such a copy paste. All I have to do now is take my bag and then go hug Angelina. Mom has texted me, this time from her American number, that they've arrived, and that was thirty minutes ago. Mom will sort of take more time, since it's an international flight and Angelina's custody. Tyler's supposed to be in here since yesterday, so he's probably the one to pick me up, and I'm right, he's smiling at me. What's weird is that he's gone bald, he said he'd rather suck his friend's dick than get bald, that's how much he loved his hair. 

"Bald? That's new." I narrow my eyes, and smile at him.

"Love you too sis." He scoffs and I hug him. I've missed him so much. "It didn't turn out good with Christian, right?" He just ruined his gift, I'm not giving him that. I nod and smile as I see Angelina. 

"Oh my god, you're all grown now!" I shout as I see her getting closer. I hug her tight and don't let go before she does. She does look older, it's just that she seems sort of hurt, you know, because of her father's situation and all. Alcoholic parents are the worst.

"Mommy, I love you." She kisses my cheek. I look at her eyes, and see happiness through them. "Your hair, it's amazing!" I knew she'd say that, her accent's so mixed up, Americanized British. 

"I love you too Angie." I grin, holding her. "Mom, it's been so long." We both get closer for a hug. I haven't seen her since July. 

"Shall we go, grandpa's going to kill us for being late." Tyler cuts us off, and walks, rolling our bags. 

"How's university going?" Mom asks, smiling. 

"Great, I'm now a student's friend." I tell her, proud for some weird reason. Angelina's playing with my hair, she's too happy with it.

"That's good, helps get better grades of them." She shrugs, encouraging me. 

I'm in my flannel, jeans and boots. Angelina's asleep, because jet lag, and mom's probably in her room. I head to the living room, you know, to hang out with the rest of the family. I am confused, few voices are speaking and it's very low. 

"What did you tell her when she saw your hair?" I hear a female voice asking. I'd say this is mom, but I'm not sure, since most of her family speaks like her. The Washington accent isn't so bad anyway. 

"Didn't comment about it." A male voice, this time, replies. It's so wrong that I'm eavesdropping, but I cannot help it. 

"Tyler, you should tell her, she's your sister after all." The same female voice speaks again, and this time I'm sure this conversation's between Tyler and mom. I can't help it but interrupt them, I'm confused, what's going on. 

"Tell me what?" I ask, cutting Tyler off from speaking. Mom looks at me, looking guilty, so does Tyler. I can see they're speechless, but I need to know what's going on, or else I won't stay in here one extra minute.