Rock N'Roll Chick

New Beginnings

I sat in the studio writing,re mixing songs and doing last minute touch ups on our album. So far, I was pleased. So far, it sounded great. We put our all into this. It was titled "Last One Standing."

I stood,stretched and felt hungry. I grabbed a bottle of water and fruit. Thanks to Kriss the studio was stocked with fruits and vegetables and healthy crap. I know why she did it and it pissed me off. But,I was starving.

Nikki and I had a wonderful honeymoon. We went to Paris then St. Barts then chartered a yacht for the Riveria. Except my vomiting over the side of the yacht we had a great time. We were just us; Nikki and Torrence. Just a pair of newlyweds. It was nice. But.....Bret. I still thought of him.

Kriss and Tony came bursting through the door looking strangely.....happy. And like the cat who just swallowed the canary. "What's up you two?" I asked nonchalantly.
Kriss beamed from ear to ear. This was new......
"We have news."
I looked from one to the other. My eyebrows raised. "Ok."
She practically shouted so much so I jumped. "We just got married! And, I'm pregnant! "
"What??" I shrieked. I couldn't believe it. Yet,I could. There was always something there between them. I jumped up started screaming and hugged them both. Kriss and I turned into teenage girls and we're screaming and crying and hugging.

"Details. I want details. Now."
I sat down and lit a cigarette. I ignored the look that passed between them.
"Well, I know you know Tony and I have always been....well...you know and over the past five months we really fell in love. Like love,love."

I had tears in my eyes. How did I miss this? My two very best friends falling in love. Getting married? Getting pregnant? And, I was so damn wrapped up in myself I missed it.

I shook my head and waved for her to continue. "Anyway, last week we found I was pregnant. So, we knew we were in love,we're for real and got married in Vegas!" The rest came out in a rush.
"Hold on my dear friends. Vegas is nice and all but we're going to have a wedding. An actual one."
They both grinned like jackasses eating thistles. "We want that too. But,after little junior here is born." Tony said.

I laughed. Nice Tony. "Well,shit guys I am so happy for you! Three out of the four of us are married. Now,we gotta get Danny to settle down." At that we all laughed. Danny will never settle down. He loves his women. Different one every night.

I looked at my watch. Shit. Gotta get ready for court. It's today. I'm not ready for this. I need a fix first.

I started to get ready and wait for Nikki to pick me up. I went into the bathroom and took just one pill to calm my nerves.

Kriss and Tony hugged me,wished me luck then got working on their parts. They were so happy and they wished me luck. Kriss hugged me extra tight.

Nikki picked me up and we drove in silence to the court house. We were dressed in our Sunday best but on the inside I was a wreck. We met Allison and she looked grim.

Nikki held tightly to my hand. I was squeezing it and didn't notice until he said "ouch. Tor."
"Sorry."
We walked in and Allison was filling me in. It didn't look good for me. Honestly, I had mixed feelings. I saw Bret with his lawyer and family. Seeing Jo and Debbie hit my heart like a knife. They looked at me with kind eyes. I saw no anger or hate. That made it worse. The judge walked in and here we go...

I was in shock. I couldn't think or move straight. I lost. Bret won. I had to have the baby. I could not get an abortion. Bret had rights. He can be at every appointment, he pays for everything and can be there when it's born. Then after that he is seeking full custody. I didn't know what to feel.

Nikki and I started to drive home when I felt something strange in my stomach. Like a flutter . Or a big butterfly flying around. I grabbed Nikki ' s hand. "Nikki..."
He looked startled. "What honey?"
"I felt something in my stomach. Like a butterfly or I was on a rollar coaster. What is it?" I was alarmed.
He smiled. "Babe,that's the baby. You felt it move for the first time."

Instinctively I held my stomach. I could feel my baby. In that instant I knew this was my little baby and I wanted him or her.