When I'm In His Arms

Chapter 23 :)

My body went numb and my eyebrows scrunched together. A deep frown crept to my face. "Thank you. That's all," I said.

The line went dead. I held the phone away from my ear and tossed it onto the neat bed, losing sight of it under the mountain of blankets and pillows. I thought about the conversation and blinked. I was confused and surprised and... I just didn't know what to feel or think. It was surreal and fuzzy and I was having a hard time grasping the idea, like a soon to be forgotten dream.

"What was that? You look so pale, like you saw a ghost!"

A lump formed in my throat the size of an apple. "The police; they got him."

"Lionel?! How?!"

I swung my aching head sideways. "You won't believe this."

"Tell me anyway!"

A breath of air escaped from my trembling mouth. The words came out, but I still had a hard time believing them. "Cassi DeAngelo."

She looked at me with a blank face and then broke into laughter. "Oh, I get it. Very funny, Saby. Now, who was it really?"

"I'm serious! Look, I can't really believe it either. I know she was talking with him... do you think he called her and told her where he was and she turned on him?"

Melissa was shaking her head in disbelief. "Wow. I guess so, I mean, she said how much she hated you this morning. I thought she would turn things around to get YOU arrested."

"That's what I was thinking... gosh, this is too weird..."

"Hey, maybe it'll be on Tv!" She approached the remote and then froze as she saw the forlorn expression on my face. "Oh... sorry."

I held out my hand to stop her. "Honestly, I'm feeling much better." Though I was telling the truth- I did feel much better- I still wanted nothing to do with Louis or any of the boys for that matter. All I needed was to find a good guy... one that acted exactly like Louis but with more intelligence. Maybe a guy like that wouldn't do something like this.

"No, it's okay. Hey, do you think we could plan a little more?" I wanted to get my mind off of Louis and Cassi and anyone else who threatened to break me.

"I thought you didn't really like the idea of a party." Melissa glanced at me with eyes that saw through anything. "Are you okay? You wanna talk about it?"

"Nope. There's nothing wrong."

"Okay. But if you do want to talk, I am here like a... like a..."

I pusred my lips to keep from laughing at her fail if a pun, but then a tiny bit of air escaped from my mouth and made a crude noise; that was it for me.

"Hey, I was getting there!" Melissa tossed a pillow at me and I ducked just as it whizzed last my left ear. I still couldn't stop laughing. I clutched my stomach and dropped from the couch to my knees. Why was it so funny? Or maybe it wasn't and I was trying anything to get my mind away from Louis...

Either way, little by little, I knew I would be okay.

That night, Melissa told me a story. Not a fairytale, not anything scary or terrifying; not even remotely funny. It was real.

It turns out that her mother, Sandy, left her and her dad alone when she was about five years old.

"You're the exact copy of your mother," her dad would tell her. She hated it when he said that, but she also felt pity for him. Maybe he found comfort in his words; if he couldn't get his wife back to his happy home, he'd find other ways to keep her there.

"You can see it in his eyes," she told me. "He'll be looking at me and just drift away. He averts his eyes when he gets really sad I think. When he can't even bare to look at me because I'm her mirror, reflecting everything she once was. He actually misses her."

Sandy had been distant for a while, ever since her daughter was born. She was losing her mind along with who she was; eventually, she lost herself. Slowly, she faded from reality and saw everything as a bump in the road. Hurting it, seemed to be the only way to smooth it.

She didn't beat Melissa, though. In fact, she never even looked at her. Her own flesh and blood was invisible to her like the tiny hairs on the back of her neck that stood straight up when she so much as glanced at a school picture of her daughter.

But her husband was a whole new story. She would slap him around and scream and yell right in front of Melissa. And he did nothing. He stood there, stone hard and unmoving. His angular face was blank and wistful. He remembered the woman he fell in love with, and this wasn't her.

Many times he tried to make it work. Sometimes it did. Sandy would look at her daughter at times and see love. And other times she saw nothing.

Sandy was irreplaceable but he didn't want to believe it. He kept working to make her better. Day and night he cried himself to sleep when she wasn't around to ridicule him for it. He prayed for an answer, a sign that would point him in the right direction. Anything that would save his family.

One day, Melissa came downstairs after hearing some shouts that were louder and more serious than usual. She caught one last glimpse of her mom's backside rushing out the door and that was that. She never called, she never dropped in, she never even came back for her things.

It was a year before things could be normal again. Her dad met Narissa and their lives began again. Sandy never came back into the picture and Melissa hoped she never would.

"All I remember was her blank stare. She looked past me, through me, and under me like I was nothing more than smoke. I'm not sure why I was such an abomination to her and I doubt I'll ever know. Narissa is my mom, not that useless stranger."

Melissa and I were lying parallel to each other on the bed, our heads on opposite ends (I was kicked in the head more than once that night). I sighed deeply through my nose. To insure that we wouldn't stay up too late, Narissa turned off the power in our room and we were greeted by the pitch black of night.

"I'm glad you have someone to look up to like that. She seems like a good role model."

"Yea. But you see, you are ten times stronger than I am and you, no offense, didn't have anyone to look up to for some crucial years if your life." She rolled over to face the outside of the bed and coughed. She grappled for a water bottle on the nightstand and took a swig. "I envy you."

"I've no idea why."

"Girls!" Narissa yelled down the narrow stairwell. "Time to get some sleep, okay?!"

Neither of us protested. Sleep came easily but it was full with visions of Louis.

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***Hi everyone! I know it's been a while but things have been crazy with soccer and school starting in two days, not yo mention I was trying to finish my book report in the extra time that wasn't spent with my aunt that I haven't seen in a while :P

BUT! I'm still writing(: If you want, you can check out my Zayn fan fiction, "It's in his DNA" or my Niall fan fiction, "Letters from Anonymous" which is going to be realllllllly sad. I do have many fan fictions on my profile that have been started and I hope to update them soon so please check them out!

Don't forget to follow me(; you won't regret it... I don't think so anyway... idk you can if you want but you don't have to, that's all I'm saying.

Love you lots!!!

-Ellie xx

<3