I'm Just Septic-Eyed

Chapter 22: Something Wicked

Mark shifted uncomfortably in the couch. Felix and Cry left the apartment in order for Mark and Sean to work things out. As much as Mark hated himself for what happened, he didn't know how to start. Sean was being distant both literally and figuratively, so he wasn't exactly any help. "I'm sorry," Mark said quietly. Might as well start with the basics. "I was a jerk and I didn't mean to do anything to you. I'm sorry, Jack. I really am."

Sean said nothing. Mark looked at him and frowned. This wasn't the Sean Mark was used to. Sean was always smiling or laughing. Instead he looked miserable and defeated. Mark racked his brain for something to say. Anything to fill the silence. "Do you hate me?" His voice was barely audible. 

"Of course I don't," Sean answered in a similar tone. It was odd to hear his voice so silent. "How can I possibly hate you?"

"I can write out a list if you want." Mark was serious. "What isn't there to hate? I basically abandoned you every night, I barely talked to you, I-I pushed you down... You have every right to hate me. So why don't you?" Mark's voice rose to it's normal volume, possibly a little louder. He wanted Sean to hate him -- he deserved it.

Sean rubbed Chica's head. "I just don't see a reason to."

"I made you cry," Mark practically shouted, voice cracking. "I was a fucking idiot. I never paid attention to how you felt, I never even noticed. God, I'm so stupid..." He squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his palms to them.

"It's okay --"

"No it's not! I treated you like trash for a month and when you tried to speak out about it I started a fucking argument with you. I wish I could take it back. All I want to do is take it back." Mark ignored how is voice broke. He didn't care. He just wanted Sean to be okay.

Sean was silent for a moment. His voice was too quiet when he asked, "Do you hate yourself?"

"Of course I do." Mark pulled his hands away. His eyes were red from holding in tears and pressing his hands against his face. "I was stupid and did things I shouldn't have. I hurt you. I'm not supposed to do that."

"You shouldn't hate yourself." That was all Sean said.

That was all either of them said until Cry and Felix came home. The couple gazed at the two on their couch in dismay. Their friendship was certainly not patched up, and didn't seem like it was going to be. Felix and Cry watched wordlessly as Mark left with a silent goodbye and thank you. Sean remained quiet the rest of the night. And he would be for the days to come.

~~~

Sean stayed with Cry and Felix for a week. During that week there was a constant gloom in the apartment and awkward silence. For once, Sean didn't mind. The police even came one day to tell them they stopped monitoring the area. Sam was clearly not returning and there was no point to waste their time. But they reassured them that they would not stop searching and to call immediately if Sam showed up again. Sean had nearly forgotten about Sam. Rather surprising considering the stab wound that caused him to limp.

He then began to wonder if Sam would start his rampage again now that the police were gone. What else could he possibly do to Sean? He had nearly put Mr. Morrison in his grave, he hindered Sean's walking as well as Cry's ability to speak, and even shattered the most precious thing Sean had. There couldn't possibly be anything else Sam could do other than kill him. And at this point Sean would welcome any death Sam had planned. He was a total mess without Mark.

Mark wasn't doing any better. He only left the apartment to go to class and he didn't showed up for work. Marzia tried calling several times out of concern for her friend, but he never answered. Then Suzy called for work related reasons, but he still didn't answer. Arin downright banged on his door with Suzy by his side. To no one's surprise, Mark didn't answer. Ross, Holly, Cry, Felix, Mr. Ash, whoever it was, Mark paid no attention to them. He ignored everyone. He didn't sleep, he hardly ate, he barely even took showers. He was a total mess without Sean.