Struggles of a Fangirl

Struggle #31

True to his word, Saturday of the same week, Prod took me to the amusement park. The others wanted to go too but Prod made it very clear that this is a two person day of fun only. Honestly, I'm glad it was just us. I was feeling a little awkward at first because I'm used to the others being around, but Prod acts a bit more loose when it's just us. I probably wouldnt have had fun if Prince and London where there, she'd make me uncomfortable the whole time and I would work myself to death trying to avoid Prince.

 Ever since I heard him talking to Ray and Prod that day I've done everything in my power to avoid any type of contact with him. We don't speak to eachother and I force myself not to look in his direction. It's not like he's paying me any mind anyway. Him and London have been glued to eachothers hip ever since he apologized to her. From what I heard, hes planning on asking her to the BET awards soon since they are coming up in five days. The boys are so excited to be the opening act that they've been begging Waler and Dave Scott to help them come up with mind blowing performance, one that will stop people from underestimating them.

 The boys have been going extra hard in rehearsel, making sure everything is perfect for the show. Me and the girls even get to work with their costume coordinater and Keisha to help come up with cool outfits for the red carpet and for the performance. It feels good to be putting together outfits again, I've needed something to keep my mind busy other than my summer reading which I haven't looked at in a couple days. My mom would probably be pretty upset about that but what she doesnt know won't kill her.

 "Look what I found!" Joya exclaims, running over to the circle we made in the middle of the design studio. Keisha was able to book us a spot in the local design studio in order for us work on some outfits for the boys appearance at the awards. So far we've decided that they should have matching pants with different shirts and accesories. Joya holds shows off the black velvety strip of farbric in her hands. "We can put these on the pockets of the boys pants."

 Keisha nods from where she's sitting on a stool, talking to one of the coordinators. "That could work. If we shape it and place it over one of the pockets. But what color pants are we giving them."

 "Not red, everyone is gonna wear red." Yannie remarks, studying her sketch of a shirt and vest.

 "What about forest green? I think Prince and all of them would cute in it. It can be like cargo pants with one of those chained belts." She comments, twirling a strand of hair around her finger. Her eyes gaze up at Keisha innocently, looking like two huge emeralds. Those innocent eyes she uses on Prince all the time, those innocent eyes that Keisha can see right through. Even though I can't stand her, I have to admit that I like her idea.

 "That sounds cute." Renee says. We all nod our agreement and Keisha writes the idea down. We all go back to our sketches and I'm about to add the finishing touch to a jacket that I was drawing, when my phone buzzes. I take it out to find a text from Prodigy. I can't help the smiile that spreads across my face when his see his name appear on the screen. He texts me at the randomest times, starting up a conversation about whatever seems to pop into his head. I unlock my phone and read the message.

"Im covered in sweat >_<" 

i shake my head and text back. "Good, that means your doing your job right."

A few moments later another text comes though from Prod, "Yeah, Yeah I know. Whatchu doin tho? Workin hard or hardly working? ahahahaha, like my joke?"

I giggle at his corny self before typing my reply. The smile on my face must have given me away because next thing I know my phone is being ripped out of my hands by Joya. I take in a sharp breath from surprise and she smirks, "Ooh, who you texting...Prod?" She says slyly. I blush hard as her thumb begins scrolling through my phone.

 "Joya gimme my phone." I hold my palm out towards her. She laughs and shakes her head no. I groan and reach for it but she scoots away from me, jumping to her feet and walking across the room. 'Joyaaaaaa," I whine, standing up and heading over to her. Joya laughs as she dodges my reach, walking around one of the tables multiple times with me trailing her.

 "Ohh, read one of her juicy text." Renne says deviously, I glare at her for instigating and she flashes a smile back.

 "Nothing good is in there I swear! I just dont like people going through my phone." I tell them, putting my hands on my hips in fustration. Joya snickers as she keeps scrolling, invading my privacy. Yannie turns around to look at me, grinning wickedly. "You've been spending an awful lot of time with Prod, Kacey. We're all friends here, tell us a ltitle somethin somethin."

 Mt eyes flick over to London who quickly turns her head as if she's not listening. I have to bite my cheek to keep in a laugh. Us? Friends? Don't even try to front. We all know that whatever is said in this room, London will manage to slip up infront of the boys, spilling business that isn't any of her concern. I look back at Joya, "There's nothing going on between us. He's just a good friend to me and I could really use it right now."

 I gave the girls a recap about the things Prince said to me. I left out the thing about over hearing the Ray and Prod talking to him but I didn't even need to include. Apparently Ray and Roc rant about Prince and London all the time behind closed doors. They're saying that he's gone crazy and her beauty is blinding him. He's never had it this bad and it's worrying them. Even Walter tried to talk to Prince and tell him to chill out on the love struck phase but nothings working. London has got him in one of her trances...just like the boys at school.

 Keisha suddenly calls us over, "I think we need to have a little talk ladies."

 We sit in a semi circle infront of Keisha, pushing out sketchpads to the side to give her our full attention. She closes her notebook and clasps her hands together, leaning forward a little. "Look, I'm so glad that you guys are having fun with the boys and everything but let me just remind you that you're not here for much longer. We have a few more weeks to go before the tour ends and....so does everything else."

 Yannie tilts her head to the side, her hair falling over her shoulder as she scrunches her eyebrows together. "Everything like what?"

 "I mean, you and the boys." Keisha says, "I'm not blind or deaf guys. I can tell that all yall have developed feelings and stuff for the boys and I'm glad you're all getting along but...I don't know if it's gonna last when the tour ends." Her words linger in the air as we take them in. Of course we know this isnt gonna last forever, but to know that it's all coming to an end soon saddens us. "Your friendships will probably last longer than whatever relationships some of you are in." She glances briefly at Joya who's looks down at the floor. "Just think about it. The boys sacrificed alot to get where they are today. They had to leave their family, their friends. Miss out on their high school life, miss out on prom and school activities, all because they wouldn't have time for it. Now do you really think they're able to hand a strong, long distance relationship too?"

 The realization hits us all hard, I can tell by how everyones shoulders droop and frowns crease our lips. Life in the fast lane slows down for no one. "And don't even get me started on the publicity. There will be a numerous ammount of rumors, threats, headlines, drama, gossip, cameras in your face and alot more. Alot of girls cant take that and I'd hate to see yall break down from the pressure." Keisha tells us. Lettings her words marinate before sighs and standing up. "I'm not telling yall to just cut off the connection with the boys or anything, I'm just giving you a heads up."

 "We know," Renee sighs sadly. Joya gives hands me my phone, suddenly the urge to read my text dont seem so important anymore. I glance down at the screen where Prod's message still lingers...wondering how long these messages will continue to come once the tour ends and I'm back in Boston.

**

Filler :P Updating again tonight