Yesterday's Tomorrow (Calum Hood from 5SOS Fanfic)

Tears and Paper Work

Shooting straight up from the couch, I ran to the bathroom, couching, and lifting up the toilet lid, emptying the contents of my stomach. My sudden movements must have woken Luke and Calum, because they were both by my side shortly after, Calum holding back my hair and Luke wetting a handtowel to wipe down my flushed face. Once I had nothing left to come back up, I slumped onto the cool tile floor, resting my head on Calum's shoulder. I was panting, and both boys looked extremely concerned for my health.

"What was that about?" Luke asked, after flushing the toilet and filling a glass with water.

"I have no idea." I graciously accepted the water and swallowed small mouthfuls.

"Maybe it was something you ate last night?" Luke suggested, sitting down on the edge of the bathtub.

"I haven't really eaten that much in a while..." I murmured.

"Nat, you need to take care of yourself more than that," Luke scolded.

"I'm sorry! But it's sort of emotionally scarring to be raped and does not put food high on my list of things to do!" I yelled, tears running down my cheeks now. Luke flinched back, and I felt guilty for snapping, but I really couldn't help it right then. "I'm sorry, actually this time," I then added more quietly.

"It's alright." Luke gave a weak smile. All the while Calum hadn't made a sound, he only held me closer to him. I sniffed and went to stand up, wanting to shower and feel fresher for the day ahead.

"Guys, I am in desperate need of a shower, so you can wait around if you want, or you guys can go home. Whichever you prefer," I said, trying to fake a smile.

"I'll wait around," Calum said, standing up also. He gave me a quick kiss of the cheek, before walking out of the bathroom.

"I would, but I should really get home." Luke stood and started heading for the door.

"It's all good, thanks for coming around anyway," I replied. I gave him a hug.

"Try one of the tests again," Luke whispered before walking swiftly out the door. What was that supposed to mean? What test was he- oh... the pregnancy tests. But the tests, they all said no. Maybe I should just do another one, to just be really sure. Not wanting to make that decision there and then, I stripped down, turned on the water, and stood in the shower.

It was a relaxing feeling, the water hitting and then running don my back and sides. There were still slight bruises on my hips from Jason, but they were fading away all the same. I washed my body, my hair, and face. Once I was done, I turned off that water and stepped out, grabbing my towel from its hanger on the back of the door. I pulled another, smaller, towel out of a cupboard and wrapped up my hair, then dried off my body.

Ensuring the towel was securely around me, I tiptoed up to my room to find clean clothes. I dressed in a plain Blink-182 shirt and some ripped jeans. I undid my hair from the towel and brushed it out, then went back downstairs, hung up my towel, and went to find Calum. During my shower, I had chosen that the best option would be to wait until Calum left, then do another test, otherwise he might become suspicious and over protective.

"Hey," I said, plopping down on the couch next to Calum, who had been on his phone.

"Hey, beautiful," he replied, putting it down on his lap.

"Uh, thanks?" I replied in a questioning tone. Calum looked at me and gave a half smile.

"Well, you always do look amazing," he continued. "Like when we first hung out after school, you looked super cute, and that time you stayed over at my house for dinner. You just always look good, Nat."

"Cal, stop it," I pleaded in a hushed voice.

"Why?"

"Because, I don't deserve compliments like that from you."

"Why not? I like complimenting you."

"But it makes me think that we're more than friends, the way we act and the way we talk. It's just, it's not the way things are," I muttered.

"It could be," he replied just as quietly.

"Cal..."

"No, Nat. Listen to me. You were the first person to really pay attention to me, not to make fun of me, but to actually, like, pay attention. You showed me that not all people are asshole, and that you actually cared. You helped me out and you took me under your wing and showed me how to look after myself. You cared about me, and not many people did that. You let me look after you too. You got me to experience things that I never would have known, and now, we are pretty much each other's only friends. You were the first person I kissed, and you are the first person I wanted to open up to, because you are the first person I love. Nat, I really do love you, and I want you to love me back." Calum took my hands, and moved his face closer to mine.

"Cal, I - I can't," I muttered, pulling my hands back. The bet was still in my mind, but I knew that I was going to lose it not matter what now, I was falling for Calum, and I was falling hard.

"Why? Why can't you?" Calum pleaded with me. Desperate to know if I loved him back, which I did, but I wasn't ready to let him know just yet. I didn't think I was ready for that.

"I just can't," I repeated with tears in my eyes, once again.

"But why, Nat? All you say is that you can't, but you never tell me why you can't. Please, what do I have to do, what does it take to get you to love me back?" Calum's voice cracked at the end. He really did love me. Nothing I was going to say would change that, and I didn't want to try and change that.

"I'm even more unstable than I was the first time you told me, Calum. I haven't left my house for weeks and everything is just falling apart! I just can't add another problem on top of that!" I sobbed after I had finished, but the look of hurt on Calum's face made me realise when I had just said.

"Another problem? Is that how you see me? I would just be a problem to add to your list of ever growing problems? Nat, I have done nothing but try and help you! How could I be a problem to you?" He was trying not to cry, but his voice betrayed him, wobbling and cracking in places as he spoke.

"No, no I didn't mean it like that!" I went to take his hands in mine, but he stood up and looked me up and down.

"Are you sure? Because it sounded like that was exactly what you meant," he spat. I was to shocked to say or do anything, so I just sat there with my mouth slightly open, watching as he turned around in disgust and walked out of my house in anger. Just like the last time we had fought.

I managed to make it back to the bathroom after Calum had left, picking up the box of tests from net to the sink. I pulled one out and followed the instructions, then waited for the results to come up. After 5 minutes of sitting there and staring at the test for what felt like hours on end, the result flashed up: Positive.

Positive.

It said I was pregnant. So I pulled out another test and took that one as well, and another and another, until I had 5 tests, all reading the same. I was pregnant with Jason's child. I wanted to just lay there on the floor forever and cry until I had no tears left, but I couldn't do that. I wasn't going to wait for this, thing, to grow a brain and have a heartbeat. I needed to get rid of it before I missed my window. I was not keeping this baby.

I then realised that I couldn't call Calum and go crying to him, he would still be pissed at me. So I called Luke instead.

"What happened?" Luke asked as soon as he picked up the phone.

"Calum got angry with me and left so I took another test and I'm pregnant and I don't know what to do!" I sobbed covering my face with my hand.

"Am I the first person you've told?"

"Yes, and please don't tell Calum. He will flip out."

"Ok, I won't. Just breathe, Nat, deep breathe in, and let it out," he instructed me. I did as I was told, my breath shaking. "What are you going to do?"



"I'm going to get rid of it, that's what," I replied a little more steadily.

"Ok, when and how?"



"As soon as I can, and at the hospital."

"I'll come around now and pick you up. I'll take you so we can make an appointment," Luke said.

"Ok" I nodded, even though he couldn't see me.

"Don't move, I'll be there soon." Then the line went dead. I sat there in the bathroom, waiting for Luke to arrive. When there was a knock on the door I quickly got up to answer it, jumping into Luke's arms. He put his hand on the back of my head and tried to sooth me.

He walked me to his car and we got in, driving in silence to the hospital as fast as we could. I wasn't really sure what I was meant to do once we did get there, but I was too afraid to ask Luke about it. The thing that scared me the most though, was the thought that I was too late to fix this problem that had been created from my own stupidity. The thought that I was going to be stuck with it forever and that it would take over and ruin my life.

"Things are going to work out. It'll be fine," Luke assured me as we entered the building.

"I sure as hell hope that you're right about that," I whispered I reply. I looked around the place, all kinds of people were here for all kinds of reasons. Yet I was here for a reason like none of theirs, and it made me feel awfully uncomfortable standing there and waiting to talk to the receptionist.

"Next please?" The only male receptionist called out, looking up with a smile to see that I was next in line. Oh for fucks sake, the only guy and I have to ask him? Taking a deep breath I walked up to him with Luke staying right beside me.

"Hi," I murmured.

"Hello! What can I do for you two today?" He asked cheerily, it was obviously the start of his shift.

"I, uh, need information about-uh-getting," I stammered, looking to Luke for some support.

"Abortion," Luke cut in quietly. The look on the guys ace shifted slightly, crossing between concerned and then sympathetic.

"Of course. Do you know how many weeks along you are?" The guy asked as he looked through files on his computer.

"I have no idea. I only found out about half an hour ago," I told him quietly. He nodded in understanding, and then pulled a form out of the printer under his desk.

"You will need to have an ultrasound before you do anything else, just to ensure that you are still within the legal limits of getting an abortion. If you are, then you can come back and make an appointment. The form is just general information for the doctors," he finished pointing to the paper he had placed on the counter.

"Thanks," Luke smiled, picking up the paper and taking my hand, walking away from him and over to some seats so I could fill out the papers.

"Calum can't know about this." That was the first thing I said once we sat down.

"Nat," Luke began to disagree.

"No! Nobody apart from you and I can know about this, Luke!" I ordered him.

"Ok," he sighed, not wanting to pick a fight with me. "Let's just fill these out for you," he muttered, taking the pen out of the cup which was placed on a table near us.

"Alright." I looked over the information needed and started to tell Luke what to write down for me, soon enough we had finished and I stood to take the form back to the reception desk.

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OK, so do you lot love me or hate me? I was so waiting for this plot twist! But I feel bad, because I am keeping Nat and Calum apart :( Hopefully they get together soon ;)

And what do you guys think of the new cover? (It wast 5 minute dodgey editing job haha)

**********ALSO THIS IS IMPORTANT*********

I DO NOT KNOW A THING ABOUT ABORTION SO PLEASE BEAR WITH ME AND MY LACK OF KNOWALDGE! I also do not agree nor disagree with the concept, all I believe is that if the person getting it thinks it's the right thing to do, then the should be able to. Same as if they don't want one, they don't have to. That's just my opinion.

Anyways, enjoy the chapter ^.^

Vote and Comment please <3

The Author xxx