Runt (Completed & Editing)

Patterns

I woke up the next morning, painfully aware of the ache throughout my body and the emptiness in my chest. I sat up slowly, trying to keep from becoming dizzy and falling back over. Shane hadn’t moved, and was even more pale than last night if that was even possible. I squeezed his hand which was even colder than before. With tears in my eyes I checked for a pulse. It was there, but barely. I cradled his hand against my face, missing the warmth that used to flow through his body and from his fingertips onto my skin. He was the sun that lit up my world and brought hope when I thought there was none. He made me feel whole, like I had something to live for. If I didn’t have him I don’t know what I would do.

“Shane, don’t leave me. Please.” I whispered, praying that he could hear me. “I need you Shane. I’ve already lost my parents, please don’t make me lose you too.” I knelt next to him pulling his arm around me as I laid my head on his chest, listening to his faint heartbeat and shallow breathing. I laid like that until I lost track of time.

Eric came in and tried to get me to eat, but I refused. I wasn’t hungry, I didn’t have any appetite at all. Eric stayed with me for a while, neither of us saying a word. He eventually left, leaving me alone to cry into Shane’s chest. Kaylee came in a few hours later carrying two sets of Shane’s clothes. One for me, and one for him. We worked in silence, changing Shane from his torn, dirty, and bloodied clothes. I changed into the sweats of his that Kaylee had brought for me, and we too sat in silence. We both cried, but never touched. I held Shane’s hand, and Kaylee pulled up two chairs for us. I moved the chair against the couch, wanting to be as close to my mate as I could. I nodded to her as she left for the night. I fell asleep in the chair as I continued to hold Shane’s hand.

This pattern continued for a week. I would sit by Shane’s side, pleading for him to come back to me, holding his hand, and hoping that he would hear me. The emptiness was crushing. The pain I felt looking at Shane in this poor state enveloped me, and I welcomed it. Bringing myself to tears multiple times a day. I lost a lot of weight, I knew this because the clothes that Kaylee would bring to me slowly felt larger and larger.

“Nova, you need to eat something.” Eric said to me one day as we sat by Shane’s side. I looked at my mate, whose condition hadn’t gotten any better before looking up at Eric. I remembered the day that we had first met in the stupid pizza hut, and the fear that flickered in his eyes as Shane threatened him. I gave him a small smile before turning back to Shane.

I closed my eyes thinking of Shane’s face that day. The beautiful way his eyes sparkled when he saw me for the first time. The way he smiled when I told him that I would stay in Texas with him. The way my skin tingled when he touched me. I squeezed my eyes shut, as a few tears streamed down my cheeks. I took a ragged breath and let go of Shane’s hand. I let it fall from mine as I slowly left the room without a word. I trudged up to Shane’s room, my room, I suppose. I opened the door silently and let myself in. I closed it behind me, not bothering with locking it. I took another deep ragged breath, breathing in his scent. I fell to my knees to the carpet, the emptiness overtaking me. I crawled along the floor before pulling myself up to the bed. The fact that I hadn’t eaten in a week had finally caught up with me. I laid on top of the comforter, letting the exhaustion overtake me as I always do. So rarely lately do I fall asleep by will, I just simply give into the emptiness and the exhaustion. For once I started to dream, and in my dream, Shane came back to me forever.