The Light in the Dark (completed)

Tell you what?

I didn't go to lunch or dinner with everyone else. I stayed inside my room and went out after lunch to get a salad. And that's all I've had some breakfast. I was actually really hungry but I didn't want to go out and face 'Paris' which happened to be the new girls name. None of the other girls had joined in all of her teasing but they've all had they're moments. My stomach growled with hunger but, there is nothing I can do to help that. And I like making progress in something even if it is loosing weight.
    Then, I didn't realize what I was doing, but doing that changed my life forever. 

•••

2 weeks later.

It had been a week since school had gotten out and I had had no more visits from Zach. I still wasn't feeling super well but I had been ending on my medications. I didn't do much nowadays. Only snack, maybe a granola bar for breakfast and salad for dinner, nothing more. I walked uneasily toward the full length mirror which revealed my true self.
    I gasped as I walked past it, thinking it was a ghost. My body was pale and my cheeks were hollowed. I had bags under my sunken eyes. My arms and legs were thin and you could count my ribs. My face have in to no emotion and my eyes had a dull sense of life. No, I couldn't see the light in them, they looked like glass. I ran my fingers over my arms and felt the bones pressing out from them. My knee caps stuck out to far and I had shadows cast from my cheek bones. I was skin and bones.

•••

I continued to eat like that for the next to weeks. I didn't leave my bed unless it was to get a small bowl of lettuce and carrots. I didn't know what I was doing wrong anyway. I didn't care what anyone thought about me and I never have. Paris had continued to tease me. She was everyone's favorite. The other girls soon followed her lead as she took my blankets, saying it was "to cold". I now slept with my bare pillow. People say they don't mind the cold, but they never slept by the window in the middle of winter without any cover but your thin layer of clothes. I had gotten three colds since she had started her parade. I haven't even seen Zach since the night in the garden and I regretted even getting that close to him. I tried to tell myself he was just busy but the more I lay to do nothing but think, the more I thought he had just left me alone. Today school started back and I was away from Paris's raiding but for only seven hours.
    I groaned and peeled myself from my mattress which I don't think you can call a bed anymore. I dressed myself in a thick knitted sweatshirt that was donated to every girl here about a year ago. I had just recently fit it lately but now it hung off of me like a blanket. I brushed my hair through with my fingers and let it lay like that.
    I walked out of the building that I had lived in for the last 6 years. My legs shook with effort to walk. I hadn't been out for almost 3 weeks and now I was paying for it. Black dots dotted my vision but I blinked then away. I walked into the school where kids were hurriedly rushing toward their lockers. I went straight to my first period where no one was in yet. My legs were shaking and I clutched to the desks for support. I lay in my seat and lay my head in my arms. People slowly gathered their way in and I watched for a certain student to come in.
    The familiar dirty blond walked in swinging his head around wildly and when his eyes fell on me they widened in alarm. He rushed toward me but was broken off my the bell which signaled for class to begin.
    Mr. Walls walked in the room and tiredly said something to Zach. He took one final gaze at me and reluctantly went back to his seat. Class then started but I zoned out through most of it. My eyes only stared blankly at the chalkboard in which words were written.
    In gym we got to go walk/run around the track. I sat on the bench, what I had done almost all of the school year. I leaned my head against the shimmering railing and closed my eyes for what felt like a second, when I felt an arm on mine. It pulled me from my seat and before I knew what I was doing, I willing let it take me. My eyes blinked open and revealed Zach's piercing Amber eyes facing mine. I was on the track slowly walking with Zach walking backwards ahead of me.
What happened to you? He signed frantically.
I don't know. There is a new girl at the orphanage and... My hands fell limply by my sides and my vision started to fit with black. I remember falling into arms and then, nothing.

•••

White. It was the first thing I gathered from the room I was laying in. I blink my eyes open and looked to my right where I had a heart monitor and a seat with a familiar face sitting in it. His hand was attached to my limp one, and he had his head in his other hand.
    I think I made some sort of noise because his head shot up and stared at me. I held his gaze for a moment until he pulled his hand away from me and started slowly signing.
I'm so sorry, Holly.
    For what? That seemed to be our regular conversation lately.
They wouldn't let me see you. He signed.
Who?
    The girls at the orphanage, they refused to let me in. Understanding flowed over me as he signed. But I shouldn't have let them stop me cause then you wouldn't be like this.
    I started to sign something but then I noticed a tube in my stomach. What's this? I sign pointing toward the small flow of things entering my stomach.
A feeding tube. He answered uneasily.
    No. Was the first thing that I though and I unstrapped it the bandage around it, Almost thrashing to keep Zach's hand from pressing it back on. I pulled out the needle after the small struggle.
You need it Holly! Zach signed quickly.
I didn't go through everything for nothing! I probably would have been yelling if my hands could scream.
Fine. He signed, defeated. But why didn't you tell me? I stopped for a moment, not understanding.
Tell you what? I still didn't quite understand what he was saying.
That you were anorexic.