Stole My Heart - One Direction (Fan Fiction)

Understand

Chapter 23

A/N: Hey everyone! So how are you? Hope you are fine and glad that you are still reading my work! So I will not make you wait any longer, here is the next chapter! FAN. VOTE. COMMENT! J Thanks xx

XxangelxforeverxX

Lexie’s POV

            Instead of moping around and be depress for the rest of my life. I made myself busy by still going on tour with the lads and the girls, going back to Australia to continue the show. Nathan of course disagrees with everything I do but either way he is not changing on my decisions. Maybe the OLD Lexie he knew would change to please his but I am my own person and what I felt for him back then is no longer there. Even Uncle Si proposed to postpone the tour and just take a break but I do not want to upset the fans because of what has been happening.

            I have not checked twitter or facebook for two weeks since those messages are full of ‘CONDOLENCE.’ ‘I AM SORRY FOR YOU LOST.’ But what irritated me the most is that they do not even know my Dad. They do not even know what it feels like to lose someone you cared about. Everyone is waiting for me to break to the point that I will smash things that will remind me of my dad. I have been snapping at them for the past few days and because of guilt I apologize for my behavior. Of course they kept on saying that they understand but the question is … Do they? I know they are patience is thinning … How long until they crack? But the more important question is … When will I break?

            I can tell that Louis is trying his best to be okay. I can tell that he is keeping it cool and the lads and girls or just maybe Harry and Cess only know what really happened because of the way they looked at both of us.

~Flashback~

            We were at the airport boarding the plane in thirty minutes to Australia. I made this decision that will clearly benefit the both of us. No matter what happens I let faith decide and just hope Louis understands on what I am about to do.

            I saw Louis and Harry were talking but I stepped in and said, ‘Louis, can I talk to you for a second?’ Louis hesitated but Harry patted him on the shoulder and said, ‘It is okay Boobear, I will just go talk to Cess over there.’ I did not wait for him and just went to a secluded place just for us to talk privately.

            ‘Everything okay babe?’ Louis asked. He is really curious and looked nervous just by looking at his eyes and his body language. I sighed and said, ‘Louis, I just want to say is that … I am really glad that for the past few months you were there for me. Loving me, the flaws I have that will forever be with me. – ‘ he then cut me off mid – sentence and said, ‘What are you saying Lex?’ I can see it in his eyes, the hurt, sadness and pain on what I about to do. I then continued saying, ‘I cannot be with you Lou. I –‘ he then again cut me off and said, ‘Was it something I did? I said? What did I do Lex? Tell me. Do not do this. Please.’ the look on his face, begging me not to do it and pleading me to change my decision but nothing will change my mind. I hugged him and said, ‘Lou, you did nothing wrong. I assure you that. It is just that I think we should break because with all that is happening in my life right now I do not want to hold you back. I feel that I am no longer myself. There is this missing piece and I cannot find it. Believe me I did try but I am still lost. Please understand. I am doing us a favor.’

            I unwrapped my arms around him and looked at him in the eyes. Eyes were once full of emotion is now emotionless. He is silent for about five minutes and then looked at me and said with a bit of emotion, ‘I understand.’ I then hugged him again and said, ‘Thank you. I am really sorry Lou.’ I took a step back and gave me a weak smile. We then made back to the other lads and girls. Louis went straight to the plane seeing as we are about to board and Harry went after him. I just stood there with Cess beside me and asked, ‘What happened?’ I then said, ‘We broke up.’ She gasped and before she asked furthermore I went inside the plane and through the first class going to my designated sit. I put my headphones and turned the music on. Forgetting the people around me and just wanted to be alone. Big Girl’s Don’t Cry by Fergie blasted and just wished that everything will be okay and that Louis will not hate me for the decision I just made.

(http://www.metrolyrics.com/big-girls-dont-cry-lyrics-fergie.html)

The smell of your skin lingers on me now

You're probably on your flight back to your home town

I need some shelter of my own protection, baby

To be with myself in center

Clarity, peace, serenity

I hope you know, I hope you know

That this has nothing to do with you

It's personal, myself and I

We've got some straightening' out to do

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket

But I've got to get a move on with my life

It's time to be a big girl now

And big girls don't cry

Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry

The path that I'm walking, I must go alone

I must take the baby steps 'til I'm full grown, full grown

Fairy tales don't always have a happy ending, do they?

And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay

I hope you know, I hope you know

That this has nothing to with you

It's personal, myself and I

We've got some straightening out to do

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket

But I've got to get a move on with my life

It's time to be a big girl now

And big girls don't cry

Like the little school mate in the school yard

We'll play jacks and Uno cards

I'll be your best friend and you'll be mine

Valentine

Yes, you can hold my hand if you want to

'Cause I want to hold yours too

We'll be playmates and lovers

And share our secret worlds

But it's time for me to go home

It's getting late, dark outside

I need to be with myself in center

Clarity, peace, serenity

I hope you know, I hope you know

That this has nothing to do with you

It's personal, myself and I

We've got some straightening' out to do

And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket

But I've got to get a move on with my life

It's time to be a big girl now

And big girls don't cry

Don't cry, don't cry, don't cry

~End of Flashback~

            I can tell that being on tour with him will take a bit longer for him to move on. All I want for him is to be happy and for him to be happy is to let me go. I am a lost cause. A broken girl that needed to be fixed but sadly I am the only person who can do that.