Holding On To You//Joshler

Chapter 17

//an// I hit 1k reads on ao3 with this fic I'm sobbing, thank u to everyone one who has lasted 17 chapters lmao, or actually read any of it at all :)))))))))

♪Tyler♪

I was feeling very self conscious all day. I know to anyone else wearing what I was wouldn't be a serious issue, but for some reason I just hated the fact that people would notice me a little more. When I was with Josh earlier I felt less uneasy, as per usual he was more extravagantly dressed than me so people didn't bat an eye when they saw me.

Eddy unglued his eyes slowly from his computer screen when he heard his door open, he was probably scared he'd get caught streaming videos again.

"Hi Tyler" he said in a casual tone.

I gave him a small smile and sauntered over to my usual seat.

"Where's Josh today?" Eddy replied in a subtly concerned tone, he often tried to act as a paternal figure but it never really worked. I liked sir, he always tried to make small talk with me so that I wouldn't feel so alone in school. I used to hate his conversations because I just felt like he was pitying me, but since Josh came to school I realised its ok to receive a little help. These past few days I'd even gone to the effort of replying to his questions with answers that weren't yes or no.

 After going to the effort of closing his video he drove his desk chair over to me. "I always thought every chair should have wheels" he said, probably meaning to just say it to himself.

"I wasn't in his last lesson, maybe I'll text him to see if he's coming"

"Ooh, texting hm?"

"Yeah we exchanged numbers last night" I said, trying not to make it seem like a big deal.

"I'm glad you two are getting along, I really am Tyler"

"Are you trying to make me thank you? Because I will if you want me to"

"Thank me for what?" he said with an ever so faint smirk on his lips.

"You know what"

"I feel bad teasing you Tyler, you're just so innocent"

"Leave me alone sir" I replied, I was nervously hoping he understood my sarcasm.

"I'm sorry Tyler, but in all seriousness Josh is already rubbing off on you, I feel like my child is all grown up now"

For a moment I forgot Eddy was a teacher because my first reaction was to playfully nudge him, but I quickly came to my senses and remembered that he was a teacher not a friend.

"Yeah, I guess I don't know I'm just glad you made me talk to him, I wouldn't have had the guts to do it without that starting point"

"Tyler I'm going to cry, stop it"

I laughed a little as he wheeled his car back to his desk. The room suddenly felt as empty as it had done last week. I grabbed my phone from within my pocket and held it tightly before deciding that I didn't want to text Josh. I still wasn't sure about the lines between being needy and being friendly.

The door creaked open and I received a short wave of the noise from the corridor, I tend to forget how noisy the school can be when I'm hidden away in this room.

"How was the rest of your morning Ty?" Josh beamed as he quickly dashed over to the seat next to me.

"You're late Josh" I said bluntly, but my lips were trying to shape themselves into a smile.

"Come on, I was late by like 5 minutes Ty!"

"I'll let it go this time"

"How are you settling in Josh?" Eddy said interrupting Josh, but I didn't mind much.

"Great, thanks to Ty that is" Josh's lips naturally shaped themselves into a wild smile. He turned his head to smile at me too, but I was too busy shoving a slice of pizza into my mouth.

"Pairing you two up has to be on my list of greatest achievements!" Eddy was about to wheel himself back over, but stopped when I glared at him.

"So how was it?" Josh repeated after he realised I had avoided his question.

"It wasn't good and it wasn't bad" I shrugged, I was more interested in my food.

"So no one commented on your jumper then?"

"No"

"See I said it suited you"

"Well no one said they liked it either so"

"I like it Tyler" Eddy said as he included himself in the conversation again, "He's even helping you pick out your clothes. I'm actually going to cry, why cant I make friends this quick?"

Josh leaned over, the distance between us was making my hairs stand on edge. "Is he always this personal?" he whispered.

I nodded slowly, "Unfortunately yes"

"Well I like it," I could feel Josh's lips curl into a smile, "I think its nice that you have a teacher looking out for you"

"I guess so"

"What are you two whispering about?" a pale blush invaded my cheeks, I needed to work harder on controlling my visible emotions. "Aw no Tyler, I've embarrassed you!"

"Shut up, please you're killing me" I threw him a fake smile and he just laughed it off.

"Whilst we're on the subject of embarrassing Ty, sir do you want a ca-"

I cut Josh off by leaning over to him, "Don't even go there"

"Try me" he giggled.

"If you do this I wont speak to you"

"Of course you will, we're friends remember" I shot him my usual glare, "OK I wont, I was only joking anyway. No one's having my cakes anyway"

"Good" I spat.

"Never mind Sir" Josh said between his silent laughter.

Josh's phone beeped shortly after, I knew better than to look down at his screen. After rapidly sending a response he turned to me,

"That was Helen"

"And?" I said, I didn't intend to sound rude, I just didn't see the significance of him telling me about Helen's text.

"Brendon's invited her to his party this weekend, he said she could bring us if she wanted to"

"Does she? I mean does she want to invite me?"

"Don't be silly, of course she does, she loves you remember"

"Hm I don't know if I want you being drunk around Bren, you don't know him like I do"

"That's why I need you there for support"

"Oh come on that's hardly fair, guilt tripping me into coming"

"Please Ty, we'll have a great time, we don't even need to talk to anyone else except from Helen if you don't want to"

"I don't know Josh, I've never been to a party before"

"I wont leave you to fend for yourself"

"I don't know" I mumbled, trying to hide the fact that I really didn't want to attend any social events, especially ones that revolved around Brendon.

"Aw come on Tyler, it'll be a great experience for you, let yourself live a little. And if anyone asks I didn't the hear the mention of underage drinking, just don't go too crazy with it ok?" Eddy was already walking a fine line with me.

"I'm only going to make sure you're gonna be safe"

Josh's natural smile returned, I swore he even squealed a little. "I'll text Helen now"