Chapter Ten

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❝reconcile (pronounced ˈrɛk(ə)nsʌɪl or rek-uh n-sahyl), verb
the most beautiful way to forgive and forget.❞

Ryan finished wiping off her makeup, moisturising her skin with the lavender cream that she used, and Hunter had his eyes closed, smiling to himself as he tapped on his stomach, humming a tune. Ryan plaited her hair, and Hunter opened his eyes, glancing over at her. "You look beautiful," he said nonchalantly, and even without looking at him, she blushed.

"I'm just wearing my pyjamas," she said, standing and going over to the bed, lying down.

"Yeah, but you still look beautiful," he responded easily, before rolling over to face her. "How was your day?"

"Busy. I'm a bit tired."

"Me too," he said, taking her hand under the covers. "But we're together."

"That's a start," she said.

"Yeah. It is."

They were both silent, and he said, "You know, I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Mmm?"

"The... the day that Peter shot you..."

Ryan tensed instantly, but Hunter rubbed his thumb over her hand and breathed, "Shh. Don't think. Just listen. Okay?"

"Yep," she said softly.

"I remember how scared I was that I was going to lose you, Ry. I remember how I had these... these nightmares, that you were in that hallway, and I was watching as he... as he..." He took a deep breath. "My point is, my dove, I watched you go through Hell and back, and I saw how that affected you."

"I'm okay now," she said quietly.

"Are you?" he asked.

Lightning flashed outside, a spring storm, and Ryan gulped. "Of course," she said hastily.

He tugged her closer, and pulled her into his chest, kissing her rather chastely, considering they'd been married for ten years. The lightning didn't affect her like it used to as much- the familiarity of Hunter's body against hers and the feel of his hand, almost the size of the entire lower half of her back- it relaxed her, and still exhilarated her. It might be cold outside, but in this room, it was dark, warm, and dry, and Hunter was holding her, so everything was okay. "I was so scared, Ry. I saw you questioning everything. I saw the fear in your eyes every time you left the house, every time you saw me leave the house. Every time Elle said she felt a little sick."

She didn't reply to him, and he kept talking. "The night you stayed at the hospital the first time, when you still weren't talking to anyone but me, I don't think you realised, but your teeth were chattering the whole time, and you were shivering like the room was freezing. I ended up giving you my jacket to sleep with because you wanted me to stay with you but I was so scared that I'd accidentally hurt you, the way that you were. I was so worried that you wouldn't pull through that night. I'd never seen your eyes so empty."

She wasn't even sure if Hunter was talking to her at this point. It just sounded like he was reminiscing softly to himself, about a time he'd rather forget, but never would be able to. "You'd think with all the crap I've been through, I'd be used to someone trying to kill me, huh?" said Ryan with a curt laugh. "Knives, guns, I've seen it all."

"I hope you don't get used to it, darling," he breathed. "I worry about you so much, you know that?"

"Yeah. I know. But you don't have to worry about me, Hunt. I'm a grown woman."

"That's not why I worry. It's because you don't realise sometimes how much I need you, and you'd throw it all away in a second if that meant saving someone else," he whispered. "Do you know how scared that makes me?"

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